Nov 2015
A poem by
Vicki Acquah
Alive
(how do I know)
I knew I was alive
Not from the pain
Of giving birth
Not from the excruciating
Re-occurring tooth ache
Sometimes its things like this-
That makes you call on death
I knew I was alive -
Tho I did not feel alive-
I felt no pulse
Like when I
Was kidnapped
--
Nor the day she stabbed
And killed my brother-
Not when they sentenced my
Black male child
For trying to be a hero.-
Somehow
I knew I was alive
because of
Little insignificant things-
Little things -that opened my eyes
Such as
Robotic moves - A glimpse of
The mundane these things
Made me aware-of
Where the illusions end
And real life begins
More times than not
The heavy loads are
Too painful to digest-
So I focus
On the insignificant
Like when the man pushed
His glasses upon his nose.
But not when the weather
Was below zero- and cold
I knew one day the
Tragedies would cease
And that feeling of
Living would increase
That one day in spite of
All these pitfalls
And stumbling blocks
I finally realize
That I am alive
When I saw a man push
His glasses upon his nose.
I knew I was alive when
I saw the woman eating
Cheese-less Cheetos
One day life flashed
A warning button
Alerting me that
This life is real
Yet there were no rules attached
Life is complicated without rules
And even with rules
Life is still an unfair game
A complicated game of chance.
I made two babies
Laughed as much as I could
Without appearing insane
Sat through a few movies
Read only what and when
I wanted- only
When I wanted.
I was busy writing
A bunch of poems
I wanted to dance every day
The only sacrifice I made
Was sometimes I wouldn't let myself
...
I wanted to leave right
After the dancing stopped
Still knew I was a
Living being when
I saw how I stayed on
The minds of the babies..
Babies never forget me.
The child ran toward me .
He had on training pants
He could not have
Been any more than
Three -or a bit more -
No more than four.
He ran to me as
I had been gone for so long
But he was gleefully greeting
Me - how could he remember me.?
He was only one year old
When I left town.
The other kid came over to help me
But he charged me two dollars
I said" I thought you were
Helping me from your heart"
"I am". :..He Said
"but I still need two-dollars“
That was real.
The only thing acting up on my
Computer is the software
That keeps my “puter”
From acting up.
I knew when I saw him
The man - pushing his glasses
Up on his nose. It was then
That I knew that
I was still alive ..
This must be my test.
A child ask for two dollars
To help me.. from his heart
My maintenance software
Opens to error messages-
Man pushes glasses up
On his nose-incidentally-
It was at these crucial points
I now know my life
Is not an illusion-
But that is how -
Somehow -
That is how -
I know I am alive -
How bout you ?
Copyright ©2015
Vicki Acquah
Vicki Acquah
Alive
(how do I know)
I knew I was alive
Not from the pain
Of giving birth
Not from the excruciating
Re-occurring tooth ache
Sometimes its things like this-
That makes you call on death
I knew I was alive -
Tho I did not feel alive-
I felt no pulse
Like when I
Was kidnapped
--
Nor the day she stabbed
And killed my brother-
Not when they sentenced my
Black male child
For trying to be a hero.-
Somehow
I knew I was alive
because of
Little insignificant things-
Little things -that opened my eyes
Such as
Robotic moves - A glimpse of
The mundane these things
Made me aware-of
Where the illusions end
And real life begins
More times than not
The heavy loads are
Too painful to digest-
So I focus
On the insignificant
Like when the man pushed
His glasses upon his nose.
But not when the weather
Was below zero- and cold
I knew one day the
Tragedies would cease
And that feeling of
Living would increase
That one day in spite of
All these pitfalls
And stumbling blocks
I finally realize
That I am alive
When I saw a man push
His glasses upon his nose.
I knew I was alive when
I saw the woman eating
Cheese-less Cheetos
One day life flashed
A warning button
Alerting me that
This life is real
Yet there were no rules attached
Life is complicated without rules
And even with rules
Life is still an unfair game
A complicated game of chance.
I made two babies
Laughed as much as I could
Without appearing insane
Sat through a few movies
Read only what and when
I wanted- only
When I wanted.
I was busy writing
A bunch of poems
I wanted to dance every day
The only sacrifice I made
Was sometimes I wouldn't let myself
...
I wanted to leave right
After the dancing stopped
Still knew I was a
Living being when
I saw how I stayed on
The minds of the babies..
Babies never forget me.
The child ran toward me .
He had on training pants
He could not have
Been any more than
Three -or a bit more -
No more than four.
He ran to me as
I had been gone for so long
But he was gleefully greeting
Me - how could he remember me.?
He was only one year old
When I left town.
The other kid came over to help me
But he charged me two dollars
I said" I thought you were
Helping me from your heart"
"I am". :..He Said
"but I still need two-dollars“
That was real.
The only thing acting up on my
Computer is the software
That keeps my “puter”
From acting up.
I knew when I saw him
The man - pushing his glasses
Up on his nose. It was then
That I knew that
I was still alive ..
This must be my test.
A child ask for two dollars
To help me.. from his heart
My maintenance software
Opens to error messages-
Man pushes glasses up
On his nose-incidentally-
It was at these crucial points
I now know my life
Is not an illusion-
But that is how -
Somehow -
That is how -
I know I am alive -
How bout you ?
Copyright ©2015
Vicki Acquah
