I was 15 when I found
My mom's self help book
It was lying on a pile of
Clothes and trash
That's what seemed to cover
The entire floor
Of our 1 1/2 bedroom apartment
The 1/2 wasn't much more than
A glorified closet
And there was 6 of us stuffed in there
And 7 cats
I thumbed through
moms self help book
And laughed at the inspirational
*******
But then I found a survey in the back
"Do you feel your life is worth living?"
"Are you happy with your current position in life?"
"Do you feel loved and appreciated
By your family?"
"Does your family provide a sense of comfort and fulfillment?"
Etc.
The boxes were all checked no
Straight down
I felt a little more
Empty
After reading each question
Then I started to cry
I realized there really was
No happiness here
There was no one to turn to
I had hid a few beers
Down in the garage
I paid some *** to buy for me
I was always so afraid of my mom
Finding out
But after seeing the book
I brought them upstairs
And I sat on the couch drunk
When she walked in
She looked at me then down
At the empties
Then into my soggy eyes
she walked into
the 1/2 bedroom
She didn't say anything
And I felt I had said
Enough