He sends me a card every year for my birthday
and he signs it
"Love always".

Not long after I get a call,
"you've grown so much,
you're absolutely beautiful,
I love you.
How old are you now?"

I ignore the phone everytime he calls
But my mom always finds a way
To pass the phone to me.
"Who is it?" "Just talk"
I don't want to talk.

She makes me thank him for the gifts
And the money and the cards.
She makes me thank him.
"He's always thinking of you".
I too am always thinking of him.
Even though i don't want to,
Even though i would rather forget him,
But i take the phone and say thank you.
"Its polite" my mom states matter of factly.
As if everything is okay,
As if she doesnt notice I hold my breath until the very moment i give the phone back.
As if I dont know why he's on vacation.
Why hes been on "vacation" for the last 6 years.
It should have been sooner
I couldve stopped that.
I didnt know.
She doesnt know.