The fleeting years have
past by like a deer.
But I still think of her
every single day.
The first moment when we met
haunts me in my sleep.
She walked into the room
and into my soul..

They say there is no such thing
As love at first sight.
I do not know
or want to know.
Our eyes met and a thousand
kisses exchanged.
it was need  desire lust
like I had never experienced
before or since.

Our marriage vows were
irreparably broken in moments.
Secret meetings full of passion.
You were my drug of choice.

I wish it had been
just sensual attraction.
For that could burn out
when the fuel ran out.
But you saw me
not as a husband or father.
But as a lover and a man.
No longer a label I existed again.

After each meeting returning home
Drowning in guilt
lay next to my wife
Alone and lonely like strangers.
My marriage now a hollow shell.
If only we could have met first.
At least before the kids were born.

I tried to break it off several times
But she would smile and I looked
Into her beautiful eyes.
And the need for her
exploded in me once more.

It was she who finally ended it
I did not have the courage to do that.
Desolate and alone
within my marriage
I mourned my loss of her.

I eventually regained my status
as a father and husband.
I even loved my lady
as a wife and a mother.
But never again as a woman.

I saw her again  several years later.
It was snowing lightly and Carols
Were playing in the town square.
She was Christmas shopping
With her son now a young man.
It was her smile and her eyes
that I remembered.

My heart raced and I almost
Called her name out loud
And run to embrace her.
But instead I sat on a park bench
across the way from her.
With my head in my hands
And I wept like a child.