The silent creak of the small blood vessels Closing in on themselves
Restless in my scarred hands
Killing me silently

The freezing cold silence washes over me
The stillness unbroken
But for the steam rising,
This tea dying,
To warm me in a zero sum game,
wishing,
To reach the moon through miles of cool air

But
falling
  from
    this
     still
      tree,

Holding me out,
offering me to this starry sky,
Holding me out,
far from this cliff
High above shallow river water and muddy banks.

I sit here in this cradle,
Finally alone again,
without attachments
Finally myself again,
lighting a cigarette
to clear the silence,
to ward off the cold...

And as this smoke
Fills my head
Warms my chest

My heartbeat fades from my ears
Hearing unwarranted storms in the silence
Born from the swirling smoke in my thoughts
I think,
'Who am I now that I am myself again?'