You kiss me often
Hot lips to hot skin
Our burning fever bright
But we know not much more

Every meeting, in all our crossed stars
Although as heavenly as the bodies that contain us
Ends in heated whispers
That now glow like burning scars

As I look back upon our moments
That are supposed to hold our strongest love, not greatest fears
And see that they could be echoes
Of nothing more than
A sixteen year old boys newest ambition
From your half

From my half, in runny eyes
I see my fairytale reality
Imperfections and all
Fall apart at the fault that
You love me no more than your right hand
No more than the second choice
To the girl you would rather have

I am no angel or barber doll
I have faults, scars, and a past
-so do you
My reactions may not be impeccable
And my face one you'll never truly see
-although I wear no visible mask
Still I thought maybe,
For someone,
I was good enough
You made me believe I was,
Good enough,
For you

But then came the Days you were busy
And my Demons ran wild in the Night
Bouts of darkness so great
I was almost seduced by a knife
As my fear is loss,
Not being good enough to stop it
Not being good enough in life

And in your 'busy' you told your girlfriend you couldn't talk for days,
But still you would find time by some quirk
To talk to others of your current horrors,
But I'd pass it off as you needed time away from me and work,

Again and again my nightmares stirring
Were of you and your so personality-pretty friends
Or how behind my back, really
You were laughing at your means to an end
I pass that off as my paranoia
Our inability to talk, my anxiety
How it all made me feel ignored?
My depression entirely

Cause one day each week I would reset
We'd meet and greet, no work
Play games, have fun, smile and laugh
And make our relationship brightly burn

But now my fears have swallowed me
As one week turns to two and more
Your texts and calls no longer follow me
Other than a single, quick "are you free?" Drill, our "***" 's ignored,

This whole thing started out so beautiful
But now the monsters don't want to just play,
And I realised some of the scariest moments
Are those that burn bright as day

As closeted skeletons rattle their bones
I know I let someone in who set them free
I haven't said anything, I'm always right here
Right here where I said I would be

Now maybe you're going through some business right now
With which I have nothing to do
Or maybe it's all in my head after all
And another set of pills'll help me through
But I just want to say
Through it all- I'm still here
So where the hell are you?

Because your empty lips may kiss me often
But I'm more concerned with the pain in your eyes
I let you in, I won't hurt you,
Trust me please, it hurts when you lie
It hurts to think that I'm nothing
But your sixteen year old self's right hand
Yet it's the only way you ever seem to want me
And inside I wear **** like a brand.