I sat next to your hospital bed
gently holding your hand
I was trying my best to stay strong
but it was hard because I didn't understand
You were dying in front of my eyes
there was nothing I could do
but I sat with you everyday
because I didn't want to be away from you
When the doctor said they did all that they could
I got frustrated with their words
they told me you would soon be gone
you will never know how much that hurt
to be told your losing the one you love
and you have no sense of control
it leaves you helpless and speechless
and in your heart it forms a hole
When you started throwing up your food
I knew what was coming next
your body was going to shut down more
all you could do was rest
I stayed up for nights praying
that a miracle would come
but I don't think God heard me
he still took you away from everyone.

The day you died was horrible
I wanted to fall apart
but I couldn't let you see me cry
so instead I kept strong
it took all I could to laugh with you
whenever you told a joke
it took every part of me to smile
whenever you spoke
on the night you night
you quietly whispered my name
you put your hand on my cheek
and for a minute it felt like nothing changed
you looked at me with those beautiful eyes
and you told me the words "I love you"
that's when it hit me
your life was finally through.

I kissed your lips for the last time
I laid beside you as you closed your eyes
I kept listening to your heartbeat
until God took away your life
when the beeping on the monitor went blank
I sat up and looked at the screen
I saw the flat line flashing
and right then I released everything
I think about that moment a lot
that memory never leaves my brain
I think about it so much
that it keeps me from doing anything
everyday is a struggle
it's a struggle because your not here
I'm used to doing everything with you
your voice was all that I used to hear
everything changed with one diagnosis
we didn't have time to prepare
so many dreams we had were shattered
but at the time we didn't care
So many things happened
during the last days of your life
your death taught me appreciation
it taught me to realize
that life here on earth is short
you never know when your time is up
you taught me to keep on fighting
and to never worry about the small stuff
I miss you more everyday
some days are hard, some days are easy
but I remind myself everyday
that you are always here with me
I will never forget our life together
you are someone I will always treasure
thank you for keeping your promise
to always love me forever and ever.