today i slept in my bed for the first time since you've left.
i even used your pillow.
i smothered my face along the threads, trying to contract any past scent i could try and find.
on some cream colored sheets where we found more than love,
it's not fun going at it alone.
a piece of me wishes you'd smoked a cigarette.
so even the ash fumbled into my eyes,
i could cry with you in me.
god. oh good god,
i miss waking up next to you.