She was drowning in a pool of thoughts
Trying to silence who she was

Left and right
She had always been confronted with
Nothing but illusions of happiness

She was told happiness was a choice
Logic then indicated that
Depression was a choice too
And her choice ,
her choice was always depression

It was something about the pain
That soon became a ******* game

The adrenaline , the rush , the insomniac nights
They had all became a habit
It was the source of her writing
The source of  her life
It was addictive
It was a drug she loved getting high off of
It had become her best friend,  her companion
For it was always around
Anxiety was her cousin

She had learned to love them both
She embraced them
I mean how could she not
when they were the only ones
who were always around when no one else was

Time obliged her to learn how to conceal her depression
She had mastered it
And no one had a clue

She thought to herself one night
Asking the awakened sky
Why it seemed that she needed depression to survive
Why she needed depression to get by
When all she ever wanted was to ******* strive