When we were younger,
we had this magical turtle who went by the name of Fred Cleese.
He spoke in rainbows and had sapphire teeth.
We pulled them out one night while ol' Freddie was asleep,
then tried to sell them to the Fox man who lived down the street.
He wouldn't buy. Would you believe it?
That sly guy is so cheap!
So instead we ground them up with a mortar and pestle,
then baked it with sourdough to make a shimmering pretzel.
We broke our molars when we bit into it,
and all of our bones cracked too.
It tasted like the ickiness that exists in me and you.