Waiting for the weekend is not longer an option
Anticipating a pay cheque is no longer just waiting to go shopping
The freedom that comes along with sobriety is no longer an option

Sobriety has never been my strong suit nor something I am ready to achieve

Lines and parachutes are the ropes that hold me together
But they are also pulling me apart

It's Tuesday morning and I arrive at school with my sunglasses on feeling both nothing and everything at once
Overwhelmed with the fear of being found out but at the same time afraid no one will find out
The damage I've done and continue doing can be stopped
But not without my minds consent and my nervous systems support
Both are severely lacking and attacking what little I do have left

Getting high on the weekend at parties used to be fun
Now I can barely feel the high even after several pills and lines

Sobriety is a group effort and not all the parts of my mind are open to the idea