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May 2015
Hold me close dear whilst I cry. Hold me close my love whilst I die. Hold me and watch, watch me fade into nothing, a flower wilting and soul not worth saving. I’ve watched the inevitable, leaving, giving up. On me, on you, on us. Hold me as I bleed, it dripping down my arm. Hold me darling as I choke on your sweet hatred.
When you hold me close I wonder, wonder what how I’ve done this to you. I’m not good enough for you, I’ll turn you into me, emotionless, hateful and spiteful. I never wanted this for you so I’ll cry, I’ll die I’ll say good bye.
Will you hold me dear when I’m dead in your arms. My cold body pressed against your  warm body, lifeless. Will you cry over me? Dead in your arms. I guess you wouldn’t. You see, my dear, I told you I wasn’t worth it. I told you what a waste I was, I am. A waste is what I am.
Eventually, one day, we will be old and we will die. Together I hope, life has never been on my side though. When you die, when you leave me, when you move on without me I will cry, I will die, I will mourn the love I wish I still had.
I don’t know, I don’t know when, I don’t know how but here is my suicide note.
Joy Entler
Written by
Joy Entler  England
(England)   
461
 
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