I wish I could wake up and feel happy. I'm so tired of the same old thing. Wake up, go to work, get off work, go to sleep. Repeat. Where's the adventure, the fun. Why don't I live every moment, in a state of who cares, this will be over soon. I think I'm going to do mushrooms tonight after work. Maybe I need this right now. Maybe that's why he gave them to me. Or maybe he loves me. Why does every passing minute feel like some sort of sentence and I'm just waiting for it to be over. I have to get a new job. I have to find happiness while I'm still young, or someday I'll be 52 and everything that I used to think was magic, will be gone.