Heavy eyes, so tired all the time
Holes in my pants, looking like
Bras and little *******
As Jameson shots claim and dance
In our throats
I tried to eat the flower you gave me.

City skylines an uproar of lust
I can tell in your eyes, you know
What you have lost
Subway shenanigans, you
Lick your fingers repeatedly
The taste of me.

Up against a wall, loss of control
Dark beard and blue eyes
I once swore my heart into
Now there is a knowing in my step
As a bar bathroom spins
Your longing to be near my skin
Again.

Wish I could sleep on the bus
But I feel anxious about all the things
I must do and taste
A castle we climbed into
Like a little girl and boy
You wanted to take
My lipstick off.

The village.
I had to walk away and leave you
The way you left me
So many times before
Gin & tonic punishing me
As we both throw down dollars
We didn't own before

I watched you see me disappear
From afar
Wandering into the city,
I took the wrong train
Felt like all those times
I got lost as a little girl from
My mother in Walmart
Once in Disney World
I cried into the night
Fear of never getting home.

But I did.
The aroma of you still thick
But things are different now,
I tell you
As a light rain mists all over
Our present tense
What it will take for you to stay away.

A few weeks, a heavy kiss
Give you a day in May
But I won't stay, to ensure anything
With you, my Betrayer Love.

Exits, words, no goodbye
For the final time?
But opening myself to hard work
Joy, fight, respect, fulfillment


So I think of a toast
A toast for me:
Evolve, always.