walls or no walls,
(take out cash)
walls or no walls
(break out, then dance)
remember childhood
(delete, and fuck you)
remember teenage years
(you're still 18)
walls or no walls
kick me to the side of the curb,
let me bleed out while you laugh
laugh because it's hilarious
spit on my face because
it probably gets you hot
probably because it's funny
two times on the ruined field
frustration and masturbation (both of us)
kill me with silence
while I search for serenity
walls or no walls,
deep inside is my soul
I want to try again, but I can't
and I can't make this any better
walls or no walls,
walls or no walls
walls or no walls
walls or no walls
when you skim down to the good part,
there is no good part,
there is no time where it is good
when everything isn't some
cry for attention or
shitty pseudo-intellectual bullshit
you like to push on people
or at least I imagine you pushing on people
and I sit and try to remember that
this is not a venting machine
that poetry should be imagery
and metaphors and beauty or even anger
with imagery of the sun (walls or no walls)
and stars and how stars are
like the souls of people when they die
and we're all a fucking star
haha-haha-haha-haha
but that's not true (nothing is true)
I bet you didn't even notice
that I want to become what I never
wanted to become and I bet you don't
care when you hear on the news
that I was not successful and I
was not good and I had no more
imagery left no more imagery left from a few
years ago where I thought I liked
to write this stuff and I stuff my mouth
full to make myself shut up because holy Jesus
I don't want to be an asshole,
I don't want to be a horrible person
But I've already messed it up
In a month, on the same day, it will be our 19th birthdays
I remember I thought that was so cool,
and I wished on 11/11/2011 that we would be together forever
haha-haha-haha-haha
we will both be 19,
but I will not wish you happy birthday because
I was afraid you wouldn't either,
and you probably wouldn't care,
just like how I don't care about this anymore
hey, it's great that no one knows what they want to do, except you
except you
except your happy
hypothetical
bullshit
marriage. (good)bye