Why isn't it like in the movies?
I thought that's how it would be
But there's no windswept kiss
Or romantic triste
Instead, I live my love vicariously

The films promised a one and only
Or at least a handsome lover
But when the last one left
I remained bereft
I can't seem to find another

I could have won best actress award
Oh, the nights, how I cried and cried
Stayed in bed for days
Whilst counting the ways
That my ****** Jane Austen had lied

Perhaps there is no Mr Darcy
Or even a Mr Gray
I'd be happy with a simple soul
But while my heart's on parole
I'm stuck in a Groundhog Day

No Sliding Doors romance for me
No Love Actually, no fun and laughter
My hope has gone
Of that special one
Or my happy ever after