Feb 2015
Getting back in touch with the comfort of the clutch. a miserly that I miss so much
of a life lost in the exhaust of a burnout
and u know there's only so many ways things can turn out
so no surprises
reminded every day how pointless his life is
Not the man that I wanted to b
n definitely not the man that I wanted u to see
you'll agree
the real me, is one of those things ud wanna hide and hold secretly inside
I only lied cuz some things r better untold,bring it up and watch me unfold
a cycle that gets old real fast
leaving u on the shore to watch as I cast myself into a sea of self destruction
I find comfort in the familiar dysfunction
where I finally feel like I fit!
so I sit n ride out the storm. my insecurities keep me warm as the world is torn apart
I grab a horn n start playing...I dunno something like the blues I guess.
My mom n dad made a mess who's willing to confess he's never been the best son or sibling, the one who did bring shame to the family name
A flame. Lost in he clouds of smoke.
No joke
We soak up the suffering n the sadness
To the point of madness
Dad this....isn't the way it's suppose to b,is it?
I avoid your calls n refuse to visit
Sometimes I think I hear u call my name
The way u did when I was a boy n we were playing a game
Gabblie ****, monkey, or worm
I'm 30 years old but u still use the term
After how many times this bridge has been burned
U helped me rebuild, warm welcomed return
Ud think I would learn n I did as a kid,
You'll always love me, despite the **** that I did
I use to cry when I'd see u calling when I went off the grid
I felt such failure, how many times r u gonna have to bail yer
kid outta jail, so he can just home n snort another rail
Then lie to your face, accepted my position as a disgrace
A grown man behind bars who just wants to feel daddy's embrace
To u I'm not fair we spent so much more time together while I was there
Just know that I care, but I can't bare to b swallowed by your stare
When u look in my eyes n your son is not there,
Both torn apart within that moment we share
Realize as I try my best not to look high
That Everything that I say, is still a lie to this day.
Every night I still pray that I'll wake up n not b this way
But for now all I can say is I'm sorry....silently too myself
The words "Im still a tweeker "stuck within my mouth
of a life lost in the exhaust of a burnout
and u know there's only so many ways things can turn out
so no surprises
reminded every day how pointless his life is
Not the man that I wanted to b
n definitely not the man that I wanted u to see
you'll agree
the real me, is one of those things ud wanna hide and hold secretly inside
I only lied cuz some things r better untold,bring it up and watch me unfold
a cycle that gets old real fast
leaving u on the shore to watch as I cast myself into a sea of self destruction
I find comfort in the familiar dysfunction
where I finally feel like I fit!
so I sit n ride out the storm. my insecurities keep me warm as the world is torn apart
I grab a horn n start playing...I dunno something like the blues I guess.
My mom n dad made a mess who's willing to confess he's never been the best son or sibling, the one who did bring shame to the family name
A flame. Lost in he clouds of smoke.
No joke
We soak up the suffering n the sadness
To the point of madness
Dad this....isn't the way it's suppose to b,is it?
I avoid your calls n refuse to visit
Sometimes I think I hear u call my name
The way u did when I was a boy n we were playing a game
Gabblie ****, monkey, or worm
I'm 30 years old but u still use the term
After how many times this bridge has been burned
U helped me rebuild, warm welcomed return
Ud think I would learn n I did as a kid,
You'll always love me, despite the **** that I did
I use to cry when I'd see u calling when I went off the grid
I felt such failure, how many times r u gonna have to bail yer
kid outta jail, so he can just home n snort another rail
Then lie to your face, accepted my position as a disgrace
A grown man behind bars who just wants to feel daddy's embrace
To u I'm not fair we spent so much more time together while I was there
Just know that I care, but I can't bare to b swallowed by your stare
When u look in my eyes n your son is not there,
Both torn apart within that moment we share
Realize as I try my best not to look high
That Everything that I say, is still a lie to this day.
Every night I still pray that I'll wake up n not b this way
But for now all I can say is I'm sorry....silently too myself
The words "Im still a tweeker "stuck within my mouth
