you know, i can sit here and write endlessly about how i feel & try to express through words what's hurting me..
but, at the end of the day this is only temporary..
the relief i get from writing is similar to the relief i get from cutting, its beautiful yet so ******* temporary.

of course, its better than nothing at all but i dream of a time where i no longer need to write poetry with anonymous subliminal statements\ messages.. where i no longer run on here every time that i feel an urge to cut or every time that i get this beautiful yet dreadful tingle in my chest.. i dream of a time where i can run to you, and you know without it being said what i am feeling..
a time where your ear becomes my canvas.
i dream of a lover that doesn't despise my scars but finds so much interest behind them that they won't rest until they know what caused them, who caused them and when it will stop.
a lover above all lovers, my lover... *but i'm stuck between "if its meant to be, it'll happen" & "if you want it, go and get it."