All I do in life is long for something that can't be fulfilled. There is no answer to the questions; no filling the void. The girl I miss would be of no comfort if she were in my arms tonight. I would just be uncertain about something to do with her, wondering if I'm really happy with her; and the truth is I wouldn't be. When is it going to be my time? It's coming one day anyway, and I see no difference whether it comes today or in 40 years. I will not be fulfilled or happy in this life. That is a plain fact. Music, drugs, self-reflection, friendship, family, work, relationships - all these things leave me wanting more, needing more. God is no longer something I can believe in. I desire more regardless of what activity I'm engaged in. Connection is fleeting, never truly attainable. When is my time? I'm as ready as I'll ever be. When is my time?