I know
my pain is real
when hours pass
and i get silent
then i finally hear
my heart
gasping for air

I know
when art is good
my heart whispers
lines of beauty
between breathing

I know beauty
when my heart
stops beating
until i take in what i watch or hear

and i know
suffering
doesn't seem to make sense
and i would do less of that
with a smaller heart
but my heart just won't stop growing

My heart allways says
and allways screams
and often cries
until i give it the pain
mine and yours
and even the pain of the people on the news
and sometimes even pain from fiction

And my heart gets heavy
so heavy i think
it can't beat anymore
my limps ain't strong enough
to carry around all this pain inside me
my muscles are screaming to close off my heart
stop entering pain because we just
can't take it anymore
But my heart keeps adding
my heart keeps going on
'you think this is pain?
just wait for the day you get cancer
or your mother dies.
Or nature finally finds it's way to your city
and show you what real pain is all about'

every time i feel like collapsing
(i may even consider to leave life
and search for a world without pain)
my heart beats
that single knock, really saying
'I am the one carrying oxygen
and life
to every vein and ever muscle
if you think you are alife,
that's just because I turn your pain into something else
every time you hear me beat
you feel me shaking inside you
that's the sound of me fighting your pain
I chop of it's head
create life, by turning it into something else
I TURN YOUR PAIN INTO LOVE

And yes, my heart get's heavy
i look at it
and lose all hope
i am just one person
how did i collect so much pain
and how can i bear this kind of suffering?

'don't look at the pain'
my heart says
'look not at what I take in
look at what I let out
look at every day I make you get out of your bed
look at the words I make you say
turning a smile on someone's face
look at all the small acts of kindness you will do
making life a little better'
my heart says 'it's all small steps
but every time I beat, I make this world better
every time I beat, I create a little love'

'and this is all just baby steps
I am still growing up
practising
I'm learning of what I am capable
I'm preparing myself
and when I'm done
I'll show you so much love
that you'll forget
what pain even looks like
don't even ask me why you're here, because
I am beating
until I have given

All my love'