God, I don’t want to break,
but my bones have forgotten how to move without his puppetry
to lead them.

I am bending the wrong way- pulling muscles, twisting myself into
dances I did not learn
my feet are slipping on the floor

and you find yourself laughing because you do not catch me
you puppeteer
you mockery
you mock me
as I lifelessly move for you

I cannot break these strings you’ve attached to me
they are sewn into my heart,
my lungs,
my head
cannot think for itself anymore
as he watches me,
this mockery,

I did not want to dance for you
when I fell
but the evenings catch my shadow
moving in beat-less motions
you twist me
into your smile

and I cringe the best way
a puppet can cringe
with strings attached to my mouth
smiling only out of fear.