I am a mirrored twin, the nostalgic one.

And I could hand you a sermon on kindness
But you wouldn't want it because
I've seen you kick down young children and grown men
With words and clenched fists,
Holding on to the things that you've always known.

You could try to strip away the skin to find out what's inside and
I don't know what you were expecting
Since my lungs could be your lungs,
Or my liver the same as yours, even.
We bleed the same blood from the same wounds
And my heart beats at the same tempo as yours.

I suppose I should thank you for shaping me,
Giving me my leather skin,
My ******, word-worn heart.

Oh, daddy.
Oh, classmates of mine.
Oh, teachers that never cared.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Oh Christ,
Soupy's done it again
With just his voice and a pen
He knows how to speak to me
Just through the lines that he mutters
******,
He's done it again
This time it's just like he said:
I wanna live in the city
But I wanna die in the suburbs

For once I don't care
Where the other roads lead
For the first time,
In a long time,
I don't hear them calling out to me
I'm not looking for anything
to start being distracting
I'm more focused on the path
that's been placed beneath my own feet

I've spent every waking day
Believing that everyone needed to be saved
Now I've finally found someone who does,
And for once,
I can't find the strength

     Am I losing my way?

Because I've been acting
like I'm losing my ground
But the truth is
I've been coming around
I've worked ******* picking up the pieces
And now
I dont want us to get attached

This way you can't bring me down

I am torn

Between the missing and the hurting

The ache you left is still hollow and

I don’t know if time actually heals all wounds or if it just fills them

With one part pretending and seven parts regret and

The mountain of words that is rotting in my belly

Just waiting to erupt from my tired throat

I am torn

Between my heart and my mind

If I don't cage up my thoughts

All they do is wander back to you

My skin tells me that you will be back soon

But this skin has never touched you

It’s been too long

I have since scrubbed you out of my pores and

Washed you away from my sheets

Taken you down from my shelves and

Tucked you away from the light

But when I close my eyes at night they remember

The way your voice tasted when you laughed

I am torn

Between love and resentment

Sappy is sticking to me like a band-aid and

I’m too chicken to rip it off

I’m too stubborn to let myself forget because

If I forget that we existed,

If you never hold my eyes again,

If I let you slip through the cracks,

What will I have

Then

It is a question that I won’t let myself answer

Consider this

Time heals all

Wounds but in the healing

Wounds

I've been smiling a lot lately,
laughing more than ever
taking in all my surroundings.

For the first time in a long time
I am confident in myself again
and I am surrounded once again
by beautiful people who actually care
about my happiness and my well-being.

For the first time in a long time
I do not fear sharing my secrets because
I know that I can trust these people with
the world itself if it were entrusted to me
or if it were mine to give away.

For the first time in a long time I
am truly, completely and wonderfully happy.
And it's been a long time since
I've gotten what I wanted
but for the first time in a long time
I'm getting what I need and that's even better.

And as I sit here in the dark,
I unwrap another piece of chocolate
and I think to myself with a smile:

I don't deserve all this happiness,
but I will gladly accept it anyway.