Father, forgive him,
For he knows not what he does.
Cast him not aside
With the thrown dice
And torn clothes.

Forgive me, Father,
For it is I who knows,
And it is I who throws
The dice and clothes.

- p. winter

Time plays in reverse,
Even the light adjusts her hue,
All the universe is silent and
The world hears only you.

- p. winter

To a fault I am wary
But if you could carry my eyes
You’d see life is deceptive
And so deeply buried in lies

Of happiness being
A destination to find
When I know it’s the memory
Of feeling your heart beat to mine.

Do the angels get tired of
Hearing your name find its way
Into every request they receive
When I kneel down to pray?

Will heaven remember
The sacrifice made on the day
You let go of my hand
And I watched as your car drove away?

It’s that time of the day when my eyes
Come to life in the light,
But without you to see it
They fade with the dark of the night.

Am I weak for how strongly
I long to turn wrong into right?
Does it hurt more to forfeit
Or watch ourselves die in the fight?

In the midst of the pain I’ll try
Not to lose sight of the fun,
But ignoring what’s true would be
Laughing while loading the gun.

For the knots that we tied with our hearts
Won’t be easily undone
And I’ll cry as I pick them apart
Wishing you’d been the one.

- p. winter

you know how badly i want you here
how badly i want you here
i want you here

say it again
say it again
again

how badly do you want me there
how badly do you want me
how badly

enough to come home
come home
come home
home

i am here
i am here

you know how badly i want you here
i will always be here
always

- p. winter

i lie within a patch of sun on my bed,
the sound of a guitar in the air around me,
and gaze across the street
while children laugh and dance at school

i am alone
but you are here

in the sunshine by my window
in the music that i play
in the laughter and the dancing
in the pavement ‘cross the way

i stroll through familiar streets
the cold biting at my ears and fingertips
i keep my eyes down and do not look at the trees
but i feel it in my heart when i pass the very one

i walk alone
but you are here

my hands cannot be cold
when they are rested in your own
the tree blooms in november
from the warmth that it was shown

i close my eyes and hope to dream
of anything but you beside me
for waking to an empty bed
would only rip my scarring heart open again

i sleep alone
but you are here

not only in the comfort
and the slowly fading light
but in the rosary i prayed for you,
and still do, every night

you are everywhere
and yet i am
alone

- p. winter

The hours in the day
Seemed so few
Until I had to force myself
Not to fill them with your company

For when you were there
They drifted by so easily
And now they dawdle
As if mocking me in my loneliness

- p. winter