Staring at the ceiling
Wishing sleep would come
Can't keep my mind from wondering
What has happened to our home?
The words that come from you
Are angry and full of hate
What happened to saying you love me
Being my partner and my mate?
The more pain you are in
The more problems that arise
The more you shut me out
And turn away from my eyes
I don't know how to reach you
You bury yourself inside
Shutting out the world around
You run away and hide
We all are damaged to some degree
Some to the core of our souls
It is your choice to set it free
Or let it take control
If you do not fight to truly live
Even in the midst of pain
You will lose your soul completely
And never get it back again
Let go of the things you cannot change
Take care of the things you can
Appreciate all God has given you
Take comfort in His hands

August 25, 2016

It's been a year.
A soul wrenching
Heart ripping year
I find myself at times
Wishing
You were still part of this earth
Yet.
To have you here
In the pain you were in,
Not knowing what you were worth
Would be selfish,
And more painful for you
Than this.
I know you are free
And send signs you are here
With me.
When I cry
I can feel you hug me tight
And whisper to me
Mom, it will be alright
Then a feather you leave
Right by my feet
Where I sit on the porch
To feel you with me
I know you had
your own journey
Your own plan
But to know the pain
You were living in,
And peace you could not attain
Is what I grieve
the most these days.
To know your child
Was so lost that he died
Is more than I can bear
Please forgive me
For not seeing thru
To your agony and despair
I know I couldn't fix you
I know I did my best
But the mother in me
Doesn't believe the rest
I wanted to save you
From yourself
I wanted you...
To want to, too.
I pray in the next life
Your journey is calm
Your soul is free
And as peaceful as a psalm
So journey on
My beautiful son
I'll love you
Until the last setting sun❤️

July 12, 2016

Like a newly planted seed,
So begins our love
We struggle to find our way
In this new life we've begun
Learning how to allow
For the other to breathe and be
To include them in decisions
And not have the urge to flee
Being alone is what we've known
Many years for us
Letting another into your life
Is hard, but it has a plus
We know that these are growing pains
Our relationship will survive
We'll find our groove, settle in
And our love will begin to thrive
Never think I'm leaving my love
I have chosen you for life
Do not doubt my devotion and love
Thru pain, joy, happiness or strife
Just ride the wave thru this awkward time
As we find our place in this new life

Love you always❤️
July 11, 2016

Where are we?
On this tiny planet
In a million galaxies
With no end to it?

What are we?
Spirit or flesh
A corporate mongrel
Or a fledgling in a crèche

What is our purpose?
Why do we live?
To take all we can?
Or be of service and give?

What do we serve?
In this life given us?
The almighty dollar
Or something greater than us?

What will they remember
When your name is spoken of?
A bitter, broken heart
Or a soul full of love?

Is is important?
What does it mean?
This life we are given
May Not be what it seems


June 23,2016