i only realised what "love" was
as we sat in my room smoking
breathing in eachothers scent
and i knew
that neither of us
would rather be anywhere else

it's been
572 days
since 'you' and 'I'
were 'we'
and it's been
571 days
since you decided to hate me
for breaking your heart
whilst trying to save my own
and it's been 640 days
since i fell in love with you
and the way you talk
and your voice at 3a.m.
i've been with 6 people since then
and had about 14 crushes
and you're still at the back of my mind
pushing forward
it's been 4 hours
since you last broke my heart
just a little bit more than before
but still enough to feel it
and finally
it's been 0 seconds
since you made your last appearance in my head
and i thought about how you used to hold my hand
with our little fingers
i/n/t/e/r/l/o/c/k/e/d
so you could break us apart
when anyone you knew came round the corner

(it's been two years and you're still breaking my heart)

i have a problem
i have a problem in that
i am again questioning
if i am allowed
a glass of juice
or if i should have had
three grapes instead of four
or if i am ever going to be
enough