Am I deliciously complicated?
Like a sunsets colours
Or a quiet love affair.

Or

Am I muted softness?
Like a daisy in a vase
Or a small candles light.

Perhaps I am too much
For one woman's body,
And that is why I read.

Living outside the lines

They say silence is golden,
Real women wear heels
You aint really settled down
Without a house and a set of wheels
Now I aint doing too bad
But not good enough it feels.
It just aint real...
My children are golden,
But silence is suspicious.
Who the hell has time for heels
When I have this many dishes.
I rent my house and the cars a loan
But I’m doing alright
Here in my little life
Living outside the lines.
Back to schools a nightmare,
And Im allergic to holidays.
Not sure if its the relatives,
Or the money trickling away.
I used to dye my hair for fun
Now I dye to cover grey
But thats alright,
It’s my life.

I am a women often told
That I am built to hold.
To look at.
To admire.

Someone stop admiring my fire
And ask me my name.

Standing in a hair salon,
I run my fingers through your hair.
It matches mine.
"You are the cutest" the hairstylist raves.
Cold sweat, I awake.
A memory of mirrors.
Sleep is so much harder now.

******
I scream,
Mind deep in creative things.
Your name tastes sweet
And bitter, and whiskey neat.
Haunting my questionable day dreams.

Why can't I lose you.

I know the world has not been fair to you.
Despite how many people try to get you through,
This war we call a revolution.

Even if this is only single custody,
You can always, always count on me,
I will make you a better way.

You are my brighter day

Living with a partner who
Thinks they are fine
And refuses to get help
Is not an easy thing

Living with a partner who
I cannot diagnose
I am not a doctor
But they treat me like I am

You never know who
You are coming home to
Who he is with
Or who he will be

Why then do we
Always blame ourselves
And try to be better
When we were always
Good enough
To begin with.