My enemies hate me for all I stand for, and all I'll someday be.
My acquaintances know my name and recognize it.
My casual friends may not know who I am, but still make life lighter.
My friends are the ones who comfort me when I fail but draw away when I succeed.
My best friends laugh with me about my failures, celebrate my successes, and tell me straight when I'm being a pain in the neck.
My family supports everything I do and are always there, even if I don't want them to be.
And all those in between make life interesting, whether good or bad.

None of that matters unless I say so.

My enemies make me stronger.
My acquaintances give me pride.
My casual friends make me smile.
My friends keep me social.
My best friends warm my heart (and strengthen my patience).
My family is my lifeblood and backbone.
And all those in between, make me who I am.

Thanks to everyone in my life, no matter what you think of me.

And sometimes I take baths at six in the morning in tubs that aren't my own.
And sometimes I drink too much whiskey and tell people that they’ll never actually understand anything. And when authority figures talk to me I can’t help but to rebel. And yesterday was my 22nd birthday, but I asked you not to call. And as I blow out candles on a cake you’ll never make me again I wish for a time when I thought you truly cared. And as I look around the room at those smiling faces who chose me, I am reminded that blood is no thicker than water when you have parents too ashamed to look at their daughter.

we are seven billion people
on this great big rock
and we are all alive
together.

"I'm sorry, forgive me"
"I'll never raise my hand at you
I swear"
"I love you"

These bruises on my face that
I tried to conceal are finally
Wearing me
Not all the make-up in the
World can beautify the tallies
Of your anger that adorn my
Skin

Your heart beats anger
And it courses through your veins
Pulps of blood I tried
To hide with layers of clothes
Have finally stained
And I can't lie anymore

You call this love?
Is love the purple bruises
Plastered across my pale skin
That have been left behind
By the velvety hands I used
To yearn for?

You love me
It's okay
I should not be afraid
You were just blowing
Off steam
You love me

I've been swimming in this
Pool of denial long enough
To know that I can't really
Swim, I'm drowning
And my feet are firmly
Fixed on the ground

I am afraid of
The monsters lurking
Behind the iris of your pupil
The demons that lurk
Behind your shadows

I haven't seen my mother
In a few months
I'm scared she'll see behind
The facade I put on
She'll tell me
"Baby, you need to leave"
And I don't want to leave
He doesn't want me to leave

My head has been banged
Across the kitchen walls
More than it has been raised
These walls have been repainted
Repainted, and repainted
My scalp has been snatched
More times that I've cared to
Admit

I'm ashamed to say
I've traded parts of me
For shambles of trust,
A lot of bruises,
Rough ***,
Infatuation,
And called it love

Tiptoeing down the hallway
Praying my parents wouldnt wake
Sneaking out the back gate
To meet you by the lake.

Its become tradition
To grace this spot at night;
And down behind the cattail bog
We can disapear from sight.

Crickets hum and whisper
The lightening bugs aglow ,
They dance and flit about us,
Putting on a show.

Summer heat , a giant moon
and only you and i ,
On a blanket making love
Beneath the twilight sky.

I'm tired of giving away
Pieces of myself like
Free samples.