John Keats
John Keats
John
Please put your scarf on.

Have you ever had bronchitis?
Tuberculosis?
Have you ever shot pigeons?
Been to prison?
Played with yourself?
Have you ever been to Egypt?
Told stories of your backyard?
Been to two places at once?
Are you religious?
Have you had dental surgery?
Does your knee hurt?
Are you scared stiff?
Do you envision everything working out?
Are there toys in your closet you haven’t played with?
Are you sexually satisfied?
Do you cry at the drop of a hat?
A sad song?
A beautiful sunset?
Does the mere act of hugging make you long for more?
When will you be happy?
Are you already happy?
Does your medical record tell your whole story?
Do the stories you tell reflect the whole you?
Are you free to visit your true self on a daily basis?
When will it be too much?
Where do we go from here?
Are there aspects of your life you would rather not talk about?
Or are you willing to tell all?
Who is your best friend?
What can we have for dinner?
How hungry are you?
For ***?
For companionship?
For peace of mind?
Will there be ample time to figure it out?
When?
Why are you so impatient?
Is it your age?
Your name here_____ (not required)

What is the hardest part
                    Of being alone?
It's the quietness,
A stillness making
What ought have been a home-
a house.
It's filled with beds,
But those lover's nests
Are             Empty.
And the thought is
As occupying as a dream.
A dream you cannot feel
Because the loneliness is keeping you awake

With no one to hold down your fears
         And keep you safe.

getting day-drunk and
wallowing in self-loathing,
not only
welcomed
but
encouraged
(and more importantly-
                                         expected).

Conversation minefields,
to navigate
with only
the utmost care.
Talk about the weather
and whether
                       or not
"the game" will go the way you want,
the sitcom situation will reach resolution,
the recipe could use some almonds,
or cumin-
                     (or *****).

But avoid the specifics
at all costs.
Just remember:
School is
                "good."
                              Work is
                                             "busy."
                                                         Your husband/wife/bf/gf/partner/cat/landlord is
                                                              ­                                                                 ­                      "great."
                                                        ­
                                                                ­             You are
                                                                ­                "fine."
Just remember:
Today you are not
                                overwhelmed.
Your personal life is definitely not
                                                             in shambles.
Your financial situation is completely in order and not
                                                             ­                                   inadequate or
                                                              ­                                            hopeless or
                                                              ­                                                   causing insurmountable stress.
  Today,
                                                ­                             You are
                                                                ­                "fine."
So
laugh politely,
accept the guilt-trips,
roll your eyes only when they look away.
Know
they mean well.
                            (or at least pretend they do)
Reminisce and
overeat and
don't apologize.
Fight and bicker and debate.
Cheat at cards
(but don't get caught!)
and accept each other's flaws.

No matter what,
just remember what
is ultimately important-
Despite the criticism,
                                    the misunderstanding,
                                               ­                            the generation gaps,
                                                           ­                                                    the dysfunction,
                                                    ­                                                                 ­                      the disappointment,
                                                 ­                                          the unrealistic expectations,
                                                   ­              the heartbreak,
                                    the competition,
             the confusion,    
the pain.    
To have a family (no matter what form)
guarantees
you have a place you belong.
The place can be uncomfortable,
and small,
and unbelievably hard to find
and a nightmare to maintain
but it is yours,
so be grateful.

And revel in the strange and difficult and wonderful love only a family can offer.

Imagine a universe with no galaxies, no planets, no stars, no meteors, no satellites, no moons.
A vast blackness.
Nothing to grow.
Nothing to become.
A never-ending emptiness
in which you're forced to survive.