i gazed upon the fields
of deceased memories
and i found
black and white photos
of how things used to be

i cut away
from all those things
i cut away
   from everyone
leaving myself stranded

i lost every connection i once had

and somehow
beyond the disconnection
   i found myself
     comforted
       by the company
         of my own

*and that's how it's always been

i am a withered tree
as i wake up half heartedly
"good morning"
rings throughout a desolate room
while clinging to the thought
that misfortune goes up and down
like those graphs we used to draw
and the persistent side of me
is surely convinced
that i'm running trails
to something much brighter

it is a nice feeling of tragedy
when i let the bathwater
gently slide into place
and underneath the door
through the threshold
blue wisps from the television
keeps your face lit up
throughout the course of the night
i hear birds and those sounds they make
not just in the early morning
but always
leaving spots translucent beside me
every noise is subtle and
sinister
staring at the dark corners
cadaverous
forgetting only means that you’re
making room for something new

My hearts made of tinder
And every word you speak
Is another match ignited
Every empty glance you give me
Produces sparks
I'm highly flammable
Please stop trying to burn me to ashes

you sought, you pondered through ideas, thoughts
of life and death
you scribbled them out
with harsh lines and heavy ink
you began to see the big picture
and your eyes of realization
should have been of those
in movies
with a loud applause

i'm sorry that i want to die sometimes
because life is beautiful and i realize that
did you know
i wrote a poem about our fingers intertwined
before we've even met
well now
the only things that rest in my hand
are made of fleeting self destruction
while my vessels sleep in silence
quick
break any chandelier you might see
because your bones are similar to art
tired glass friend
we both lay sharp and deadly
on the dark wooden floor
so it only makes sense
if you cancel your plans

Sometimes I dream I'm floating
Weightless throughout space
With this thought my heart beat steadies
It dark up here in outer space
I don't know how to get back home
but that's ok
It's cold up here in outer space
So cold it makes my skin turn grey
my hair comes out here in outer space?
Something's not adding up
It's supposed to be lovely in outer space
I’m far from home and i am cold
This isn't peace
This isn't beautiful
This is prison
This is hell
This is an eating disorder

You're such a joyful spirit
Painted vibrant yellow
I wonder what went wrong
And where you are now?
Are you just as cheerful now?
Do you dance around the graveyard at night?
Singing loud for all the other ghost
Who roam the night restlessly?
Please tell me what you're doing
Tell me how you are.
Are you dancing in the graveyard?