Never let me go
For I'll
Hold onto
You forever.

I've been on the run
My whole life
I've been lost
Roaming
Hoping for sanctuary
Needing something permanent
I'm filling
Bursting with emptiness
I buried the pain
And covered it with ignorance
I avoid every flashback
Wince at every thought
Because they still remain
I'm breaking
Into complete catastrophe
I'm running
From the life
I wish I never lived

When affection
Was bred from
Those innocent looks
The first thing
I could muster was
I'm with him
And that is not
Going to change
And I meant it.

I lay in my bed...
My mind wanders about...
Then I begin to imagine it all...
Him laying on me kissing me...
Slowly kissing down my body...
As he reaches my ******* I don't know what to do...
I smile and say his name for the pure joy has overridden my brain....
He continues down my body kissing every speck...
And when he and I are making sweet love....
We say only each others names...
Panting with such passion...
Our glorious moments they have to end...
and when they do...
I find my self lying in my bed alone and I realize it was just a amazing dream....

I had to clear my mind,there was a memory I had to find.
His love made me blind,he was once so kind,
The snow gently fell upon his face,
In our special place,he always did make my heart race,
He had this untouchable grace,
Even as he'd pace.
Our laughter grew,It was then I knew,
As the air blew,
My heart Flew,
And it was that moment I fell in love with you.

I

F
    A
          L
                L

Like a leaf

Floating from

A colored tree in autumn

Straight into his arms

I absolutely
Love it
When he cups
My face in
His palms
And kisses me
Because
I never feel
More loved by him
Than in that moment
It's as though
The world has slowed
As though his heart
Is whispering to my soul
I want you forever
And I can't help
But smile as my heart
Flutters for the first time
In ages.

Within An Instance I Was No Longer Me,
I Was One With Him.
Two forms became one,
Our lips met and suddenly the world began to slow,
The clock seemed to stop dead,
The only thing that existed was he and I,
And We Had Become One.
The feeling of his lips on mine sent chills everywhere,
I swore in that moment nothing could get any better,
I knew nothing could surpass the wonderful taste of he and I passionately kissing in the rain,
I had craved the moment so long,
And then when hope was nearly lost,Miracles occurred,
He was mine,
And I was his,
Nothing else in the world mattered,
Everyone else ceased to exist as long as I was with him,
In His Arms The Only Thing That Mattered Was Him,
And How Much I Loved Him.

She realized she anchored people
Made them feel like staying was a trap
So when they got away
She realized that she was her own anchor
Always trapping herself
Always saying nothing would work
Because lack of faith is what shatters
She realized being an anchor
Was too much weight even for her
So she cut the chains
And she threw herself overboard
So she would never hold herself back
Never again.

I love you
Love the way
You kiss me
And hold onto me
Sometimes your hands
Lingering at my waist
And my face lights up
I love the way
You look me in the eyes
And how you say
I love you
I love that you mean it
And that you want to spend forever with me
I love that we
Want a child someday
And we both want it badly
I love the way you cry
And I cry
For each other
Just because
And how we can be jealous
Not because lack of trust
In one another
But because neither
Of us seem to trust the world
We've both been disappointed by people
Even each other
But we're stronger
Together
Than we ever could be apart
So I love those freckles on your ears
And the way your eyes shimmer
I love the way you
Open your eyes when you kiss me
And I love the way you want me close
No matter whose watching
Yes,
I love all of these things
BUT
It's not WHY I love you
You see I love you
Not for what you look like
Or the things you do
But for the kindness in your heart
And the way you make jokes
I love you for your fear
And for your patience
I love you for everything that you are
Your fear of clowns and spiders
And your insecurities
Because to me
Their just perfect
To me
Your amazing
And I love you
For everything that you are
Everything.

You cannot
Deny the facts
You've loved before
*You will love again.

As always without you
I am a pile of withered ashes

Brokeness that can't heal
Not alone at least

As always I realize another mistake
Another flaw of mine

Another reason I have lost you
**** babe

I tried so hard not to love you
To not need you
To not miss you
But your soul
Has always been a part of mine
And even when others said you
Were completely insane
I said that your craziness was mine

**** sweetie pie
I freaking miss you
You were my best friend
And even though
You could forgive
You couldn't forget
And even though You didn't understand
You tried so hard to
And I think you knew
The contours of my soul
More than anyone ever will

Because ****** baby
You were my eclipse
Always passing through
Sometimes you'd brighten everything
Other times make it so dark
And every once in a while you
Would make it both
And it would be beautiful
We never worked
But we wanted to so badly
We fought for years
Until we quit

And I still miss your little scar
And your freckles
I miss your weird appetite
And I miss your fear
Of hugging me when I cried
I wish you were here
Because I'm a bigger mess without you

Some love stories aren't perfect
Some don't have a happy ending
I know ours didn't
But it was still amazing.

It crumbles from beneath you,
You watch in both silence and fear for your world has collapsed,
Your sins are unforgiven,
The pain only surges through you.

Alone in the darkness and nothing seems right,
You watched life be taken and death be given,
You must realize that this is now your everyday life,
Breaking down and letting the world fall to infinite pieces.

It all crumbles and all your left with are the memories you've buried,
Your poor soul burned by the schorching memories,
The one person who can help is acting as the devil
And truly you are alone.

Now you cannot ignore your arrogance,
Your face to face with the worst of you because it's all you've ever seen,
Escape is unreachable for the darkness in you outweighs the light,
And still you watch as it all crumbles beneath you,
Feeling the pain and suffering,
Feeling the terror you cannot control.

You let it crumble but you don't look away for a moment in fear of any good you may miss.

He
Yes he is like
The waves
That make me smile to see
He is the sparkle
In an animals eye
He is the beauty
In every raindrop
You see
He is wonderous
Like the wind
On a warm day
Or the sun's rays
On a cold day.

Everyday I can't remember because
That hurts way too much
So I'm trying to put myself out there
At least through technology
Because let's face facts
I am not an openly social person
But I'm swallowed by the lack of decency
I am not just body parts to be displayed
I am not going to give myself away
I am not just one part
I am not a pair of ****
And let me say since when did ****
Outrank a personality
I will not send pictures to appease their fetishes
Or to satisfy them
I will not settle for a hook up because that is not who I am
That is not what I deserve
I just had my heart thrown aside
I do not need ***
I need a conversation
A friendship
A polite interest
I do not need to be objectified day in and day out
My confidence levels are lingering on low
I don't need anymore problems
I need a solution.

There was a basic interview
Where we asked
What you liked
Who you were
And you responded
With so many words
That sounded like angels
Whispering in my ears
Your everything I want
And the thing is
I barely know you
I know facts
I know this insticnt
It draws me to you
I smile and say hi
You smile and wave in return
Our eyes in constant lock
Never breaking
Until we're walking in
Opposite directions
I **** the urge to follow you
To follow and keep staring
Into those eyes
I'm tempted to talk
But there is this fear
That you aren't everything I want
Even though
My heart screams
Your Just Right.

Hey there,
I know we don't know each other very well, but I thought you ought to know how much I love you. I've waited my whole life for a man so wonderful, a man who maybe, just maybe, could love me in the same insane way I love him. I know my love of ice cream and the color green is a bit crazy and that I can be wild and weird but that's something I hope you'll learn to love. We can watch science fiction series together and have snacks, of which I got way too many. You'll kiss me all the time and it'll always make me smile. You won't look at me like I'm a total loon when I refer to you as the father of my cats, or at least I hope. You'll watch the same Friends reruns with me whenever they're on. You'll soothe me when my anxiety is bad. You will always be extra careful when we are making love because you understand what I've been through. Hopefully, you believe in aliens and bigfoot like me because that would be so cool. If I'm lucky enough to find you please know I'm not good at letting go and that I will love you so much, even if sometimes I try to act independent and self-sufficient. I hope you're real because I have so much love to give and it's hard when you have no one to love. It can get pretty confusing but I think once I meet you it'll all become clear.
                 Until we meet my love.

You carry my heart
Promised me
You'd never tear it apart
Darling you keep me whole
Always
You have a piece of my soul
You keep me from the brink
Hold me close
My only perfect link
A smile fills my chest
Oh how you feel
So unlike all the rest
We're so strange
And together
I hope that never does change
You lighten my day
And make me believe you'll stay
I love you
I don' know if it's true
But you say you love me too.

I think I hate you
Or hate myself for loving you

How many breaths of betrayal
Did you inhale my dear

Let me **** them out
Let me ride the dark wave with you

I won't let you be alone
Won't let myself forget

Once upon a time
We were happy

We were more than roommates

We were lovers
Wild and free
Roaming the streets
Kissing at every corner

We were friends
Laughing at all our misadventures

We held each other when one
Was distraught

I craddled your body in my arms
And you craddled mine in yours

Our souls forever entwined
Forever my dear

But alas the mortal world
Has once again corrupted
What was once perfectly imperfect love

I cannot sleep without remembering
That you once laid beside me

I cannot breathe without feeling you
Your deep internal aching

That no amount of denying
Will convince me of

You were not perfect
Neither was I

But we loved
We loved

In a way no one else
Can ever make us forget.

Tomorrow
I promise
To crawl into
Your arms
And just hold
On tight
But as for now
I must rest for the night.

My love
It's always
Existed for you
And now
My lust
It grows
My body
Desperate
For intimacy
For the passion
And the
Sweet feeling
Of your finish
As well as my own
I so
Wish
For our
Bodies to collide
But sometimes
Patience is needed.

I don't
Feel like
Doing this
Anymore
I simply
Can't handle
It all
Not anymore.

His words,
They scorned her,
The tears she withheld burned her eyes,
He broke her once again,
Still she goes back to him,
Even with her heart that has just been smashed,
She still loves him,
She pretends she's unharmed,
She knows a part of him cares,
But his heart simply does not love her,
Not the way she has always loved him.
Still she can't let go,
She will wait forever,
Just for him,
Just for him to call her anything more than a friend.

My heart
Aching
As distance
Is leaving
Us apart
This holiday
Without you
Reminds me
Of all
The loneliness
That I
Spent in
The past
Few years
I miss you
My love I
Need you
I must wait
But I need you
Your kisses
Are desired
And the whispered
I love you
As well
I hope
To see you
Soon darling
And when I do
Take me in your arms
And just hold me tight.

In my mind
I am Aphrodites daughter
One of many
In our magical lands
We roam
Like wild beasts
Lust and desire
Filling us to no end
We're determined for
Love, ***, and an eternal mate
We search
Occasionally finding one
Or another
Never all
Traits in one
But we grasp
Each one we can
we harvest it
And continue on our
Rampage for eternity



Until we find cupids sons.

My kitty
Is here for me
If no one else will be
She'll share this bed with me.

It's too late now
and we can't go back
and fix everything that fell apart
in the time that you
were taking my heart
We can't put the pieces together
Because they no longer
Fit
We've each been torn
To bits
Apologies don't rid the dark
Won't bring the light
Can't relight the spark
We've harbored the pain
Love is gone
And We're both a little insane
We're troubled and lost
Can't find our way
Our joy comes with a cost
And we're unwilling to pay
I'm sorry this can't be bargained
I'm sorry for the words I didn't say
And I apologize that this is good-bye
Just promise never to ask why.

I appreciate the little things, or at least I try to
Like the way your warm when I'm cold
And cold when I'm warm
Or the way you make fun of me
Because when we hold hands
I don't always lay my fingers against your hand
I love the way you kiss my cheek
And tickle me with your stubble
The way you look at me when you want me
The good morning and goodnight texts
How 5 days a week
Your outside my house at 6 a.m.
I appreciate that I have you in my life
Because I love you
And I never wanna live without you again

All I know is that I'm a little lost right now
A lot like you are so often

All I know is this ring on my neck
Is a promise
That I would rather die than break

A promise that I'd one day
Be your wife
No matter what happens along the way

This is me
Telling you
That my heart has always been yours
And that I'm never letting go
The vows we'll one day take
Are already in affect for me

You see I vowed the day I fell in love
That no matter what I'd find a way
To make us work
To make sure
That in the end
You will be in my life.