I miss him
Almost as much
As I miss smiling

I miss him
I need his hug
His friendship

I miss him
Because honestly
No matter how bad he hurts me
I will always love him.

Its like the war never ends
We fight and fight
Make things alright
and yet we hurt
And are wounded
When does the war end
I just want it to end.

I want to go
Wherever it is
That you are.

I want to escape
From my home
Because at this age
It feels more like a prison.

I want you
To be with me
For us to be free.

Free to make love
Marry
To live our lives
And just be together.

I just want
**Want You.

Don't stay
If its because
You pity me
Or because
I'm partially
Your creation
Don't stay
Because you
Feel like
You wanna fix me
Or because
You feel bad
About
How my life changed
Because of you
Stay with me
Only if you love me.

I love you
And I miss you
And it hurt so bad
To be dropped
Like that
But I understand
Because I almost
Always understand you
It aches so much
Not to be yours
To be alone
In my fight,
But I suppose
You can't help
Or shouldn't
But every moment
We have spent
Or could've spent
Passes through my mind
And reminds me
Of all the sweet
And tender words
That I'm missing
Right now
And I thought
About using
The word sweetie again
And all I could do
Was cringe
Because thats you,
My baby
My sweetie pie
My best friend
My lover
So I stopped crying
But I'm not happy
And I miss you
And your hugs
And your comfort
But I wait until
You deem me
Okay
And I will
Be waiting.

You scare me
No, you terrify me

With every touch
With every word
With every smile
Or heartfelt care
I am terrified
More and more

Because don't you know
Loving is terrifying
Because heartbreak
Is the scariest thing
That I have ever known

Because it brings more darkness
Than a starless night

More darkness than
When you shut your eyes tight

You see you terrify me
Because you are everything
I have hoped for.

You
See
Everything
In me
That not
Even I can
Somewhere
Beneath all
Of my flaws
And impurities
You see good
And you've fallen
For it
For me
All I know
Is that the
Best part
Of loving you
Is how you
Accept me
Is how your here
Now
And hopefully
Forever.

We're old enough to know we want each other forever but young enough for dreams and aspirations to come true and together I believe everything we want and everything we dream is possible.

Your the only man
I could ever see a future with

The only one I can see
Myself marrying

I always imagined having a child
And it would always be our baby

I dreamed of us and our marriage
My dress and your unhappily worn suit

We'd live together so happily
Sharing that bed
And you'd no longer fake sleep

I'd call you husband and you'd call me wife

We'd raise that child together
Teach him right from wrong

We'd die together
Or one after the other
And our souls would see


Exactly what I always suspected
That we were meant to be

That we have been bonded since the
Very beginning
And that's why we haven't given up

That's why no matter what
We'd return to each others arms


You get blinded sometimes
I do too
And as lovers
It's our jobs to help the other see

There's something here SO
Worth fighting for

So baby don't let go
*Let our dreams come true.

Sometimes I close my eyes
And watch our memories
I have my hands on your chest
Smiling with a heart
That was never more content
Than in that instance
And you laugh at me
And you just lean in to kiss me
I watch that girl, me
Know without a doubt
That your her forever
Her lover
Her mate
Her future husband
And as I watch them
I realize how willing
I am to fight for that back
And as long as you never give up
I promise I won't either
I watch them laughing
Crying, making love,
Napping and eating
And suddenly I see
His eyes
Looking at her
And all his love
And all of hers
All the shared energies
Flows freely and peacefully between
Oh how wonderful it is
To almost feel it again.

Know here
And now
I love you
With all that
I am
And ever have been
I hope you see
That you mean
Everything to me.

I told you

Go

It's okay

I understand

This problem

Has no solution

You said it yourself

I'm ****** up

So its okay

Go

But **** me on your way out

For my heart will surely break

And I'll lose my will to fight

Go

But know I will always

Love you.

Tomorrow
Marks another
Lost day
Because I was
No good
Tomorrow
Marks another
Agonizing
Day of misery
Because you were
Suppose to be here
Mouthing I love yous
As you kissed and held
My hand
And I was suppose to
Pretend I was more
And cry looking into
Your wonderful eyes
Tomorrow was
Gonna be a day
For us to be close
And to cherish this
One day
That we got
And now
All it'll be
Is another day
We missed
Because of me.

As always I am
Healed with passion
With love
With an undeniable
Connection between our souls
So that in the end
Everything
Is better than okay
And we can live out
Our lives
Together
Just as we planned.

Don't tell me you miss me
When you're lonely

Tell me when you're
With friends or busy

Tell me when I least expect it

Tell me all the words you know
I want to hear
But only when you mean them.

Curiosity
Is not
Always
A good thing
And Appreciation
Is more important
Than you think.

If you won't let
Me die
Can I at least
Grab a knife
Pick up a blade
Use my pin
Metal music isn't
Loud enough
It can only release
Some pain
A cut
Might release more.

Never
Don't
Let your
Walls collapse
Don't let
Your heart
Lie freely
On the ground
Because
If a billion
People miss it
One person
Will
Get it
They'll stomp it
And then
All that will
Remain
Are shattered
Pieces
That will
No longer
Fit.

I was born an unhappy girl

In an unhappy existence

And when we came together

When you're eyes met mine for the very first time

I knew of happiness

And suddenly it was swiped away

And I fell

And I cracked

I lost everything

I messed up as a young girl

Because that's what I was

An unhappy girl

Who had life dangle

All her hopes and dreams

Before snatching them away

So when I saw your eyes for the second time

I had already fallen all over again

And I say again because you were right

I couldn't love you that time apart

Because I couldn't love me

Because you can't love a person

When you spend days wishing for death

So when I fell in love with you

For the second time

I was scared

Terrified of you leaving

And even though you left again

I will not break like I once did

Because your still out there

In the distance

And a girl with a dream

Is a fighter

A girl who dreams of a boy

With brown eyes that sparkle just for her

So as you inch away I'll inch closer

Because let me tell you

Past present and future

We have something infinitely strong

And completely undeniable

I still believe God paired us

Because a God with mercy and love

Blessed me with a heart

Able to love you until the end of time

And I do not believe He squanders love

So I won't either.

You asked me
To be yours
After we talk
Caught up
Made out
And I said yes
With such
Limited emotion
Because I
Couldn't say no
Not to you
Not to that kiss
No one has ever
Kissed me like that
It had been so long
Since I felt its sweetness
For I never had a kiss
Like that except the days before
You left me.

I saw your face today
For the first time in
Far too long

And it was somehow
A breath of fresh air

My eyes widened and I smiled
But my heart gasped
Aching for you
Aching because of you

God I love that face

More than I ever planned to.

Sometimes I wonder if you see our memories like I do
Flashing by in your mind
Every smile and kiss and tear
All those years
All those precious moments

Sometimes I wonder exactly at which point in those memories
You decided you did not love me anymore

Sometimes I wonder if you knew I loved you
With every single bit of my soul
When you had me sleep in your arms


Sometimes I wonder
If you maybe loved me
If maybe you felt like we belonged together the whole time
Or was it just me?

I wonder if you knew just how many tears
And how much pain I have felt since I met you

I wonder if you know
How hard I tried not to love you
But it's engraved in me
And nothing and no one can etch it away
Not even you hurting me for the umpteenth time

I wonder if you miss me
Because I miss you every morning
And I miss you every night
And **** it I miss you every moment in between

I wonder if you care at all
Or if you've just passed me off as the crazy girl
But f* man I feel like I was just in your bed
And now someone is in my **** spot
And yes that is my spot
Because I can guarantee they don't rub your back
Or let you be the little spoon
Or play with your hair the way you love

I wonder so much
But it'll never be answered
I am just a dumb girl
Who fell in love with a crazy boy
And now we're all grown up
Living these separate lives
And I just can't see myself being happy that way.

I Just Hope
That Our
Passion
Never Dies


Not Ever.