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471 · Jan 2013
I'm A Failure
I get so
Happy
When I
Talk about
Marrying him
And the life we could
Live together
But then we fight
And A fear arises
Perhaps he and I won't suceed
For young love dies fast
But still I want it to last
I've been praying on my knees
Since day one
And hope has yet
To die.
470 · Mar 2013
March 30th
What is there to say
I will be a year older
Yes I the outcast
Of society
This marks another
Year closer
To freedom
To casinos
And maybe a drink
But why should we
Celebrate
You see
I'm old enough to see
Just how lonely I can be
I will spend my day
"The day "
Alone
Roaming the streets
Waving goodbye
To all those years
Of parties
Where I only invited
Two friends
Because it's all I had
I'll be waving goodbye
To the memories of
Crying each year
For no good reason
You see this year
I'm one step closer
To being
Not only a fully
Grown woman
But an adult
And with age
Comes a new responsibility
I just wish
I was good with goodbyes
Or with handling life
But hey maybe this year
Things will change
But if not
Let's have some
Great ******* cake instead.
470 · Feb 2014
HOLD
I'm feeling like
I don't really
Have anything to
H O LD
Onto anymore
And I'm not
Very good at
H O L D I N G
On by myself.
Lately, With him away, I seem less alive. I have one friend maybe. I hardly get to see him and now I'm gonna see him even less, school is kicking my *** and home is just additional stress to top it off.
469 · Feb 2014
Weather
A hurricane swept us away
And for a while i didnt know
Where we were
The storm had swept away
All goodness
And all I could grasp
Was the gray cold air
Suddenly I was on ground again
And the sky cleared
And wherever I  was
I was happy to see light
But the storm in my heart
Raged on
My heart raced
And I worried
Because I just wanted
To go back,
Before the storm
But this sunshine will do
This light will keep me at peace
I must believe the storm has passed.
Idk.  This is generally ******. But the first sentence was in my head.
469 · May 2014
Sweetie(10w)
One word
Can almost make
Everything alright.



Thank you baby.
469 · Feb 2012
"Hold On"
Fear riding me,
Nerves on edge,
Excitement waiting in hopes of this,
Patience is ending,
Hope is beginning,
I need the words to be true,
I need my love to only be you,
I want you to love me too.
Is this all a game?
Was it all a lie?
I guess I just have to try,
I have to hold onto love,
Hold onto hope.
And promise not to let go.
469 · Dec 2012
Run As Fast As You Can
I wanna go
Run away with you
Escape these
Miserable yet
Minuscule stressors
I want
To only.be with you
Because you
Make it all better
468 · Jan 2013
Darn Spanish Class
You're a ****
And I'm so
******* sick
Of backing
Down and
Turning away
I don't care
What you say
I'll say something
Back to you
I'm standing my
**** ground
And I'm not
Backing down
You are a monster
And I'm finally
Prepared
To fight back.
468 · Jun 2014
Aged Paragon
I pray
I cry
I hold onto hope
That something
Has changed
Something was wrong
Just so you can stay
And our plans
Can follow through
You use to wake up
And call me
Your paragon of a wife
Your packing up now
And I don't want you
To ever pack up us
Because I'm afraid of being buried.
Everyday I hope things can change so you can stay...
Can we
Just agree
To make up
And let things be.



I need you.
466 · Apr 2011
...
...
You were my new disaster and in the end it led to my broken laughter.I tried to fix the pain But I had already gone insane
466 · Jul 2014
Gently Rough
Just the thought
The distant memory
Of your hands near me,
On me, around me,
It makes my whole body
Tingle with excitement


Oh I miss the gentle touch
Of your hand on my cheek
And the roughly passionate kiss
Of your lips melded with mine.
You left me with a kiss
                             Your good-bye was the sweetness on my lips
      The tenderness
             The warmth
                       The comfort that I found nowhere else
Every kiss after
          Poison on my tongue
                          A sour taste that couldn't be killed

Their lips nothing like yours
           It is not their faults
               For you are the only one I truly loved
                    And for that every other mouth
Was like toxic waste on my lips
        Numbness at every battle
Knowing this was another fight my tongue would lose
     Out of disgust
I'm sorry that we kissed
  Because now I'm in withdrawal
And if I do not kiss one of my loves soon
       Every kiss may taste horrid
            And I certainly don't want that.


;P
466 · Feb 2021
Wake me up
Too much sleep

Too many R.E.M cycles

Too many dreams

Of course your face had to show up at least once.
Sometimes this corrupt world
Makes me feel silly
For loving words
While they gallivant off
Into the world
Doing whatever they do
I write my words
Heart aching with every word
For I am released
And they give me a wide eyed look
When I say I love reading
And that I can finish a book
In a matter of hours
But I don't care
Because to me
Words can be beautiful
Words can set you free
Whether your writing or read
Words are just wonderful.
465 · Apr 2014
No Competition
Baby there's no competition
My priorities are simple
God is the first
And then there's you
And anything else
Just falls behind.
465 · Sep 2011
Hating this want
So torn,
So confused,
You no longer want me,
And I no longer wish to have you,
Yet still your memories roam my mind,
Haunting me,
Making me ache for the memories to become moments,
But I don't want to,
I don't wanna think about you,
I want to love someone new,
Someone who actually loves me,
Someone who won't break my heart so often,
I can't let go,
I want to,
But you still visit my dreams,
You still taught me,
Your ignorance makes me want you more,
But I don't want to,
I don't want to want you.
465 · Oct 2016
Sigh
She sighed into the cold air
Watching her breath

She hoped someday
Somehow she wouldn't feel
Like this
So in love with love

She hoped when she whispered
"I love you" into the night
That one day
It wouldn't be unanswered

She was so tired
Of loving so much
To be used and left
She was tired of lies
And of being alone

She felt like he had to be out there or maybe she had already met him and he was one of the people who left her

She wasn't quite sure
She wasn't sure of anything
She was lost
But she was still full of love
Even if she had no one

She sighed and whispered
"Someday"
Because no matter how the world breaks her she will always find love and she will always find hope.
464 · Mar 2013
Don't Wanna Bleed.
I'm too happy with you
To bleed
To ruin it all
For a blade
I miss the sting
Miss the relief desperatly
And though it's been months
I fight it each day
But I'm too happy
Too in love to bleed.
464 · Sep 2012
There he is!
Your ignorance
My acknowledgement
Your glance
My stare
Your glorious gaze
My fight to ignore
Our eyes meet
You smirk
I walk away
Put my head down
And smile
Because
In your smirk
I saw the boy
I loved
Once more
463 · Apr 2013
Holy Matrimony
Soon my love
We'll show those who doubt
Soon they'll see
Our love is not temporary
Our battle was fought
And we won
Soon we'll be more
Together forever
United and unbreakable
We are forever
We belong together
We are soul mates
I will never stop
For my love is undying
Until the day I die
My heart is yours.
463 · Mar 2021
Aries
We are addicted to people

We fall so deep

We never quite know how to let go.
They've destroyed the place we met,
That school that we made the home of our meeting,
The hallways where we walked by one another,
Waving like idiots,
The tables we sat at,
Perfectly positioned so we could stare at one another,
The desks we learned in,
The one that were in perfect view so we could laugh even from across the room,
The door we stood by,
Patiently waiting for them to let us in,
The doors that we stood in front of so awkwardly in silence,
That's all destroyed.

Now all I have left is the place we walked to,
Up the street,
Behind another building,
The place where we shared hundreds of laughs,
And thousands of smiles,
That place,
On that step by some random door,
The one where we first kissed,
I remember the rain,
It was always light and cold,
Always,
As in the two days we visited that place,
The two days we actually kissed.
I think about that place all the time,
I loved it,
It had a essence unlike any other place I've ever been,
But Maybe It was just because the memories made,
The ones that have not yet been destroyed,
And even if they do,
I'll have my mind,hopefully for many years to come,
But even when that too perishes I will have these words,
These Words Of Our Special Place.
I've been

Abandoned here

Left to fend for myself

I've been left

I'm now a formation of nothingness

I'm used goods

I'm weak and broken

No one wants me

Not even me

I'm hated by many

And I hate them in return

But it doesn't change that I hate myself most of all

I'm a worthless nothing

I'm just a girl

That grew up to be

A shadow

Of it's true inhabitor

I'm just a human

Who feels the pain

Like a million tons of brick on her chest

Because each breathe I take

Is another moment I'm reluctantly alive

But look at the bright side

Each breathe I take gets me a little closer

To My Ultimate  Demise.
463 · Apr 2011
In your eyes...What am I
In your eyes what am I...
In your eyes am I a monster?
In your eyes am I a beautiful woman?
In your eyes am I a nuisance?
In your eyes what am I...
Am I smart?
Am I funny?
In your eyes do see the woman you could love forever?
In your eyes do you see someone to love or someone to hate?
In your eyes what am I?
462 · Apr 2011
I....
He was my everything...
Our memories consisted of so many things.
Some bad,Some good
I remember when we met I felt so sure I'd love him and I was right.
I remember all the things that let to that event.
Our snowball fights.
Walking beside each other.
Laughing together.
Staring at each other.
I remember when he found out I loved him.
I feared he'd leave me.
Then when he stayed I only loved him more.
I remember the first time we spent apart.
I was destroyed.
I barely recovered even to this day.
Now he is gone for good it seems and It hurts each day he's away.
I think of bringing myself pain again.
I think of how much life has changed since he left and not for the best.
I miss his hugs.
I miss his kisses.
I miss him saying he loved me.
I miss him.Being by my side and making everything feel like it's going to be alright...
461 · Sep 2013
Every Breath
You are my dream man
And even when we
Were young I knew
My heart would
Whisper each night
He's the one
He is your true love

And I smiled at the thought
For you were and are my best friend
And now to be yours I see how right
My heart always was
Because you make life worth while
You make every bad moment
Every tear
Every cut
Every sad thought
Worth while
I awaken each day
With a smiling face
Knowing I'm yours
Looking into those eyes
And seeing your love
It completes me
I love you
For you are my soul mate
You are my best friend
You are my lover
My fiancée
My one true love
And one day
You will be my husband
And I'll sleep peacefully each night
Knowing I am forever yours
Knowing I'm your wife
And that our struggle
Has all been so
Worth all the wonderfulness that has yet to come
But that I know deep in my heart will.
461 · Jul 2014
Seven
Your

           Arms

Are

         A

Synonym

                For

Home.
461 · Aug 2015
Cracked Pavement
I grew up
Only to want so badly
To be a child again.

I became a woman
After my battles
In girlhood
Only to wish to go back
And patch the pavement
Where all the mistakes reside.
460 · Apr 2011
The rain
The rain makes me feel sane and today the rain has to fade and now I'm insane and I'm stuck feeling pain because you've sprained my heart it'll never be the same I'll try to restrain,my hatred for you is contained will this feeling ever be sustained?...
460 · Nov 2013
Special Love
I think our love is special
Because we never give up
Not ever
And because for us
There is no limit
We believe in each other
In the same way we believe in our love
With all of our hearts
And I think we have every right
To think that our love is special
Because every love story is
And when that love story
Can outrun the sands of time
We will still remain
Strong and unswayed
For our love is undying and true
We are fighters
And we fight for what we love
We fight for each other
So that we're never alone.
460 · Sep 2022
Silence
I think about reaching out all the time

But I know I would care too much

And you wouldn't care at all

I know if I did I would hurt

So each day I hold myself back

Because I have nothing and everything to say

And I know it's best to leave things the way they are.
459 · Dec 2012
The Zoo
I want
To go to
The zoo
With you
Point out
Our favorite
Animals
And least favorite
I want to take a picture
Of the animals
With you at my side
And maybe capture
That amazing smile of yours
I want to do so much
But I'd love to see you
With me
At the zoo.
458 · Oct 2016
Broken Rambles 818
Every ounce of joy
Is gathered and destroyed for me
And that is the way of life
I am so use to people hurting me
I am so use to being left
And as time goes on
My too big heart
Will finally wither
You can only take so many hits
Before they stop hurting.
458 · May 2012
Love Illconcieved
Each day I remember
Our November
The moment that started it all
The ones that for months after made me bawl
One day you were mine
And everything was fine
Then I saw you leave
And it took me a while to beileve
When I did I couldn't cope
All I had left was some sort of hope
But you let me down
Made me more than frown
Some cuts on my shoulder
The weight of my emotions one heavy boulder
With my blood I said good-bye
Knowing your love was a lie
And my broken heart was a trophy of my failing try.
457 · Sep 2011
Someone else(The way)
I guess it's okay you don't love me anymore,
I'll find someone else to kiss me,
I'll find someone else to be my best friend,
I'll find someone else to hug me,
I'll find someone else to love me.


But Inside I'll know,
They can't compare
To the way you kissed me,
To the way you were there for me,
To the way you hugged me,
Or to the way you loved me.
The only love I've known
Is a love that to this day breaks my heart,
Loving him,
It was so cold,
Like a blizzard in the of middle winter,
Freezing yet beautiful,
He loved me,or did he?
I'm still not sure,
All I know is that he won't even look my way,
I sometimes see him even running away,
Not even a hello,
If your wondering what I did wrong I'll tell you,
I might've mentioned him to my friends,
I guess they asked if he knew me,
And he replied"No." ?!
Such a liar,
And I loved him!
I still do,
The only difference now
is I don't want to,
I would do anything to forget him,
All he did was hurt me,
I can't stand remembering,
Not anymore.
457 · Aug 2012
Just Need To Make Sure.
I wish
I could kiss you
One last time
To make sure
We lost our spark
To ensure
No feelings
Will come back
I wish
I could make sure
That my love
Will never
Return
To make sure
That you'll
Never
Break my heart
Again
I just need
To affirm
That you're
No longer capable
Of hurting me
Ever again
456 · Feb 2012
"Come Closer"
You try to make it okay,
Try to make me laugh,
Try to make me smile
But all you have to do is wipe away the tears.
Give me an **** hug
And put your hand in mine.
I want you,
I need your raw skin to match mine,
I have such a desire to feel your warmth,
Please come closer,
Just stay,
Just be the only person not to walk away.
Trying to express how much I want him...
To My Limbo Love.
455 · Apr 2013
Dreamy One
The only dream
That ever came
True
Was you.
454 · Mar 2014
Condolences
He patted my back
As if that would console me
Instead though I cringed at the touch
Because it wasn't your hand
Because it reminded me
You'll never console me again.
I whispered
Everything would be alright
You shrugged your shoulders

I tried to tell you calm down
It's okay this will pass
You looked right past me
Your eyes glazed with your
Rage and frustration

I tried to distract you
Make you smile
Make you laugh
Send relief into your soul
And you frowned
And apologized

You went searching
Because I wasn't there
I had vanished
And you needed me
I left
As I was helping you
I was losing another bit of strength
I sacrificed for you
And you hardly noticed
So I left
I left
Breaking myself
So that I could try to save us both.
Just a random poem that came to me :T
454 · Sep 2019
Wince
A kiss so sinfully delicious
That the devil himself
Cannot bare to watch.
454 · Mar 2014
Northern Lights
With you in my life
My smile is so genuine
They never understand why
We go to and fro
And always end up
Together
But i try to explain
Because to me it's quite simple

You're my sun in the cold
And my wind when I'm hot
When I look at you
I think of the northern lights
And I can almost
See them dancing
In your eyes when you look at me
My heart is aflame
With passion
With words that my lips
Never fathom

You will always be my weakness
And my strength in life
And I hope we never part ways
I hope this love is as eternal
As it seems to me
I believe your it
Your the only one
I want to spend the
Rest of my life with

You will always be my sunshine
Even on the cloudiest days
You will aways be my king and I shall
Eternally be your queen
We are a love unlike any other

Nothing in the world
Can change the connection we have,
The way my heart still
Skips,jumps and tingles
Nothing will ever change
The fact that I love you.
454 · Sep 2011
I'm hoping
I'm hoping our memories will one day mean nothing to me,
But I know they already mean nothing to you,
I'm hoping one day I really won't love you anymore,
But I know you already stopped loving me,
I'm hoping one day I won't daydream about confiding in you,
I'm hoping one day the tears I cry won't be for you,
I'm hoping one day I can say I let go and actually mean it,
I hate loving you and I hope one day I won't.
Loving you is like loving Satan
Except I think it hurts more loving you.
454 · Mar 2013
Dreamed A Dream 10w
Like a dream
Come true
You came back to me.
453 · Aug 2011
Love?
Through my life I found that love is unexplainable,it can survive the depths of hell and high of heaven and still simply be only one thing,Love.How can one emotion,one word live so strongly within us without fading....
Your stronger than this
But your not
It was all his game
But it felt like you were winning
You can't hold on
But you don't know how to let go
You can't believe
But that's all you've done
You need to bury the memories
You already dug them up
You can just ignore him
But you don't want to
You hate him*
But you love him more
452 · Feb 2013
Obsessive (Don't Look)
I feel like her
That mutant girl
Who was
Intoxicated
By everything
That involved
The very essence of you
You see
I wake up
With an aching
Missing you
Hoping to see you
Hear your voice
See your words
Oh how I
Would give anything
For some sign of
Your existence
I go through my day
Bored and hopeful
Searching for you
Hoping that every
Phone call is yours
Or every noise outside is
You calling me to be by your side
I fall asleep
Wishing
I could be lulled
By your voice
Whispering
Good-night
Or something
Sweeter
Like an I love you
I feel like her
That monster that
Drove you away
And I'm afraid if I
Let on how badly
I need you
Or how scary things are
That you'll feel pressured
To stay
Which will
Make you want
To go away
I'm afraid of who I was
I can't handle this mutant girl
She's needy
Most when there
Is no one to help
And she falls apart
Pull one string too hard
And her whole structure
May collapse
I don't want to seem
Obsessive
I'm fine, I swear
*I swear
Feeling Horrible
Curled up beside you
I sleep
No longer needing dreams
No longer
Does my subconscious
Long
For I have
And completion
Fills me up
I exude love for you
My every pore
My every living moment
Is spent
Thinking of you
And the future ahead of us.
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