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Jun 2012 · 397
Who Did They See?
I still wonder
How did it look from the outside in?
Am I depicted as a ***** or a victim?
I pushed away your body
Said "No" between a lot of kisses
Left the room half a dozen times
Yet with each return seemed your pleasure didn't suffer
You did this and that
And I realized you weren't leaving
So was my submission my ending?
I lied down in that bed
And continued with
What was my final regret
That day
All I needed
Was my bed back
My sanctuary
When I invited you over
I thought we'd play games
But the only one playing was you
Your girl never talked to me again
At least I told her the truth
Even if I never could explain
The hate that I felt the whole time
I never blamed you
So even now
A year or so later
I still wonder
Who Did They See When They Knew?
This feeling
It lies
Somewhere in between
Filling me
Or is or just complete emptiness
It itches at me
While summons questions
It's hard to figure out the difference
Between reality and dreams
Or shall I refer to them as "nightmares"
Because each time I wake from them
My chest is heavy
And I feel the tears forming
People don't comprehend this
And nor do I
I can't tell if it's
The depression rising again
Or maybe it's the memories
That I burned
Coming back
Maybe it's me losing
Every bit of strength
I Thought I Had.
Jun 2012 · 377
Strength Isn't In Thought.
I hear the words
They enter my body
Penetrate my soul
Leave me with this aching
An empty hollowness
I fight back tears
Hold them in with might
But instantly
In the pit of me I urge
My mind thinks of it
And there is no turning back
I want that pain now
To feel the blade seep into me
For that one instant I wish to scream
Because this is me fighting myself
This is me at my weakest
And Still Trying To Be Strong.
Jun 2012 · 287
It Was All Of Me...
The Only Thing
I Can Ever Be Sure Of
Is That I Loved You
And I Apologize
That My Heart Wasn't Good Enough
But It's All I Could Offer.
I used to be a floater
I was swept up
In your charisma
Your eyes shun so bright
And I got carried away by clouds
I lost the way
And in the end lost the brightness
Your eyes were my sun
Perhaps I floated to close
Because I sure as hell got burned
I was hypnotized
Those lips
Along with your inch deep dimples
They captured me at first sight
And I didn't stand a chance
Once the words began flowing
They didn't end
You warmed me with just your presence
So quickly I learned
And I found refuge in your voice
I knew from the start it'd end
I just had so much hope
I wanted you so badly
You saved me
And now you've brought me harm
Made me hurt
Ache
Cry too
The cloud I was floating on
Dissipated
And my dear friend the moon
Turned out the light
And let reality finally set in
So I could see
That the sun makes you warm and comforted
But it's only a tease
Because you can't touch it
And you can't hold it
Not without getting burned
Badly.
If I pretend
The pain does end
So I try to forget
Tell myself what we were was a regret
I rebuilt my walls
Trying to ignore my greatest falls
The aching will come
And it makes me easy and lay with ****
I'm no *****
But my heart is in war
And I'm on edge
Slowly trying to pull myself from the ledge
Whenever memories come back
It's as though strength is what I lack
I'm fighting these battles alone
I'm determined to escape the unknown
The images of what was will fade
And by then my heart would've strayed.
Jun 2012 · 1.4k
Pedophiles These Days(10W)
What
Do You
Call
A Man
Who
Goes After
A Teenager?
If I don't think about it
I can't hurt
If I block it out
I won't be reminded
That I poured my everything into you
And in the end lost it all
I've opened my eyes
Learned to build more walls
Now it's clear
I loved only who you use to be
The boy
Who didn't care what the world thought
Who laughed away the aching
Brought endless smiles
I miss him
That guy I met
He warmed my heart
Rescued me endlessly
He put a stop to so many tears
I'm sad
That he had to go
Because I saw the caring in his eyes
And this new you
He's rude
Hurtful
Also
As of today my heart-breaker
I just hope one day
Someone can bring back the boy I loved
Even if it's not me.
Amazing to spend days
With a vibrant smile
To see the heart breaker
With a frown
While you venture off
And learn to be yourself
To just enjoy the little things
The suffering is post-poned
I lay back into this world
Letting life find it's way
Back into my partially empty soul
I'm being completed
And it seems
By absoulutely nothing
For one moment
I believe the darkness
Has finally left me
And I can be Free
Maybe if I believe
This feeling will never go away.
Jun 2012 · 365
Gone Our Own Ways.
There used to be
A softness to your voice
A sweet smell to you
There was a feeling
Between love and desire
That once lived between
The space we occupied
Our stares began cute
Smiling without realizing
There used to be
A feeling you gave me
It made my heart jump
And leap
Twist and turn
With such passion
I never wanted to break
What was growing
But everything changed
And now
Your frustration is clear
Or is it a cold cut mocking
I put myself on the line
Admitted my desires
And you cowered away
Like the little boy you are
Your eyes connect with mine
And I feel the connection
Breaking
I feel the discomfort radiating
Off the both of us
And it collides
And it creates
What we have become
Are we enemies
Strangers
I'm unsure
I'll just be glad
When I get to say
All love has gone
And a aggrivation
Has grown in the place
I'm sorry it had to end this way
I'm sorry I have to let go
And forget all the good
Because you so obviously have
And you let the bad overcome it
Now this is done
And we
Have Gone Our Own Ways.
There was a basic interview
Where we asked
What you liked
Who you were
And you responded
With so many words
That sounded like angels
Whispering in my ears
Your everything I want
And the thing is
I barely know you
I know facts
I know this insticnt
It draws me to you
I smile and say hi
You smile and wave in return
Our eyes in constant lock
Never breaking
Until we're walking in
Opposite directions
I **** the urge to follow you
To follow and keep staring
Into those eyes
I'm tempted to talk
But there is this fear
That you aren't everything I want
Even though
My heart screams
Your Just Right.
In case you haven't noticed
You get whatever you want
Those two melons you carry
They get you any guy you want
And you stupidly fall into every trap
But can't you see the games they play
They want your body
They want what I use to give
*** and a good time to forget about later on
But darling when you had my heart
I used think you were brave and strong
You used to have my head and heart spinning
And now you look at me
And smile because you once again have what you want
All I have are the memories of my past longings
And how because I'm me they've gone unfilled
And since your you all your dreams come true.
In the beginning
I believed in you
I thought you were kind
Caring and so secure
But to know now that you
Are just like the rest breaks me
You were so inspired by my eyes
And I was lit up by yours
Our laughter once was endless
Now our glares don't even last
You once warmed me heart with your smile
Now I feel as though your mocking me
You began so bright and good
But along the way
Darkness grew in you
And your indivuality
The thing I loved
It dissapeared
And you let the dark fill you
So this is over
The love I had is through
And I swear to only think bad thoughts
About this new you.
Jun 2012 · 737
Love Is A Curse And Gift.
Inspired By It
Destroyed By It
Made Because Of It
Love is the key to life
Yet
It has been my enemy
As well as my friend
It brought me rejection
So much pain and misery
But it brought me joy
Acceptance and sucess
It built me up
So high I never thought I'd fall
But just as courage grew
Love betrayed me
Brought me to the ground
It buried me in this hole
And now love
I must tell you
You Begin So Well
But End In A Story
For The World To Know And Tell.
May 2012 · 401
Here I Am In My Weak Glory.
Here I am
With weakness
Rotting the body
Tears streaming
Aching heart
Memories
Of all my mistakes
All the regrets
Piling on
The things I cannot have
Here I am
With nothing
But the failures
Surrounding what's left of me.
May 2012 · 323
Burned Me With My Own Love.
This is it
I'm playing all my cards
Showing you myself
In all of it's weak glory
Here I am
On my knees
Telling you
I Love You
Admitting all I denied
I'll walk away
Pretend I don't care
That you don't love me
I will try not to care
Knowing I'm not good enough
But if you catch me alone
My eyes
Will be bleeding endless tears
My heart torn
And my body now hallow
Because pain
Burned me to deep
To deep this time.
May 2012 · 1.5k
Orgasmic Love Is Eternal.
Indulging in thoughts
The ******* feeling
Filling me
Sending me into oblivion
Panting and moaning
As I think of us
Our hot bodies colliding
Your emerged in me
Devouring anything you can
And I lavish in this
The feeling
Of our bodies entwined
And as we finish
I know this will never end
Our Love Is Eternal.
May 2012 · 499
A Hell Of My Own
I Need Escape
This place has me trapped
Hate evolved
It's beyond containment
These walls are collapsing
And all evil is being set free
I'm itching
To run away
Get out
Never come back
These minor inconviences
Have become unlivable circumstances
I Will Find A Way Out
I Will Escape This Hell.
May 2012 · 429
Erique,I Love You.
Everytime I smile your near
Rarely I don't want you
I** Can't help loving you
Quietly I stare from across the room
Unbelievably you catch me
Everytime you do my heart skips a beat

I never want to say goodbye

Loving you is what I do best
Obviously I've tried to stop
Very often infact yet
Each day I see you and know

Your the one for me
On each day I see you I feel whole
Unspoken words just keep me here though
May 2012 · 857
Happy Birthday Star.
Happy Birthday Darling
If no one else says it
I will
My girl
Your older now
On your way
To becoming a grown up
Your no joke
You are strong
You Keep me going
I can only try
To describe you
I would say your
Funny
Bright
Pretty
Smart
Loyal
And Honest
I trust you
Your an amazing person
And star you light up my day.
May 2012 · 373
Don't Go I Need You.
Kiss away the scars
Hug away the tears
And just be mine
Don't go
Come close
Tell me
You love me
You can't go
Stay near
You warm everything
I was a cold heart
And with you
I can feel
I'm me
I can smile
And laugh
I feel complete
In your presence
So please
Don't Go.
The world was full once
Endless possibilities
I breathed in the hope
And exhaled sucess
The world was my oyster
Holding a unclaimed pearl
But the moment I turn away
And let someone interfer
I return to find my oyster
Cracked open
And containing nothing
The world suddenly got dark
Sucess became only dreams
And they would go unfufilled
The world showed me the truth
There Is Darkness Within Everything.
Within love is hate
Within light is dark
Within Smiles are unsed tears.
May 2012 · 5.0k
Be Mine,I Want You.
You see the way I look
At someone else
But you can't see
The way I look at you
The hunger that's rising
The urges that I can't control
My desire
To just press your lips
Right against mine
To hold you and not let go
I would risk it all
To keep you
Have you whisper "I'm yours"
I wanna lie in bed
Curled up next to you
And tell you
How amazing you truly are
And no matter what anyone says
You don't need to change
Not for me darling
And not for anyone else.
For Someone Special...Wonder If They Know It's For Them...
May 2012 · 10.6k
My Brown Eyed Boy.
Our eyes meet
And yours
Pierce my heart
And for one moment
I lack air
My heart stops
And I'm lost
Somewhere
Deep in those brown eyes
I need your help
To find a way out
And then
When before I ask
For the escape route
You break the look
And leave me
Both breathless
And with
An increase heart rate
This heart
Also knows now
That I love you
Brown eyed boy
I can sleep now
Knowing you
And your
Sparkling eyes
Exist.
I wake up every morning
Knowing I can't hold you
With the facts running
They grab me and won't let go
Remind me
I will never get to wake up
Beside you
Won't hold your hand
Or kiss those lips
I'll never hear the words
That I ache to hear
Never get to feel
Me in your arms
I have to settle
For a look
A word that
Can make my heart soar
I have to settle
Living my life
Knowing we'll never
Be anything more
Than the nothing we are now.
May 2012 · 622
Fighting Love(10W)
Yell
Scream
Argue
Explain
Listen
Hurt
Ache
And
We
Understand.
I need to hold you close
Pull your body near mine
Kiss your neck
Then your lips
To feel you body in my arms
Bring it closer
For our lips to never part
The moments I could spend
Holding you
And exploring you
These moments can be
Part of magic memories
Magic moments.
May 2012 · 422
I Can't And I Won't
I can't pretend
We finally reached our end
I won't pretend
I'm unable to call you a friend
I can't forget
All the good things you made me regret
I won't threat
Though my hate is a unpaid debt
I can't say goodbye
Somehow refuse to see past your lie
I won't try
Just leave you with a whimpering cry
I can't think of you
No longer love you too
I won't call you mine
It's finally our time.
May 2012 · 352
Do Me(10W)
I want you
In bed
With me
Right ******* now!!
I would never see you again
I let the thought fill me
Walking away
I thought of us
And I tried
Just to remember
The look in your eyes
The sound of your voice
The curve of you
The lips that were mine
The hand I once held
I captured everything
And then I decided
This truly was
Good-bye
Even if I wish
It was still a hello.
May 2012 · 486
Not Love But Desire.
A growing want
The thoughts
Racing on by
Can't steer clear
Thinking
Of you
The possibilities
We could share
Kisses
Hugs
Love
I want you
My need fuels me
Just to feel
Your warm body
Lying next to me
And know
It's not gonna go
Maybe this
Isn't love
But it is as
Close as I can get.
This was honestly about my friend (female) that I have a crush on.
May 2012 · 1.1k
Divorced Princesses(10W)
Even the princesses got divorced,
They just never showed it.
May 2012 · 638
Fairy Tale Love Ends.
Once upon a time
You were my prince
My knight in armor
You rode up on your stallion
Rescued me from hell
The smell of you
Clean and new
Enticing me to get closer
The feeling of your arms
As they wrapped around me
Warming any coldness
And causing my heart
To quicken its beating
Then one day
The feel of your lips
As they fought with mine
Your the victor though
You wanted your dominance
Need it too
The touch of your hand
Leaving me breathless
Making me desire more
Knowing I could not have it
Teasing me with touches and kisses
The love we shared then
Has faded away
Died and disspeared
Your sword slashed me
And memories
Burn as a reminder
We lost each other
And now
My prince
My adorable knight
Has become nothing
But a distant memory
A part of a life
I never truly could stay in
My fairy tale ended
Because fairy tales
Are not real.
May 2012 · 430
I Will Always Love Him.
A smile to hid his demons
Pretend he's okay
  Better than he seems
   But with my love
     I see past it all
      Beneath his eyes
       Past his smile
        Away from his dimples
          Somewhere in there
            Beyond all his perfections
              I see his pain
                The emptiness
                   His agony
                     And lack
                       of trying
                         With only
                          The belief
                            That no one cares
                               Even though
                            I'm right here
                      And I would never leave him
                  Even when he breaks my heart
              I will always love him whole or incomplete.
They answer hate with hate
I answer it with silence
A lack of participation
Trying to keep locked up
Not to reveal my anger
To assure safety
No hate for me
Though hate grows
I'll keep it in
Sure not to show it
Or my weakness
Hate is not solved with hate
Or silence
Hate is solved
Only by a better understanding.
May 2012 · 368
Maybe A Human Heart.
I can hear your heart
As we lie in bed together
I'm shocked at the beating
The vibrations so soothing
But a monster is the owner
He's a user
A heart breaker
and the biggest liar I've ever met
But when I lie with him
And I feel his heart
I think for just a moment
Maybe he's human
Maybe his heart is his
And perhaps I have a chance to steal it.
May 2012 · 478
True To Monster Life.
If we are all labeled for the things we do
or the things we let happen
you would be the devil
A heart-breaker
You would be the humidity that people hate
The hail pelting you down
you would be the meteor people wish on
and get let down by
You would be a facade of all the good things
And then reveal yourself  for the monster you truly are.
May 2012 · 521
Given Up.
I never gave up on you
I refused to give up on us
We created memories
and I loved making them
Even if now I hate remembering them

I never gave up on you
Even when my broken heart knew
You had already given up on me.
May 2012 · 391
You Changed Me.
You changed me
Made a smile grow
Helped a heart learn love
Taught me how good a kiss could be
Showed me we could have a future

You changed me
Made laughter become cries
Helped a heart learn how to break
Taught me a kiss can end badly
Showed me I was just a memory.
May 2012 · 533
Queen Of Heart Break
They whisper with stares
I answer with my tears
My heart is racing
Hands trembling
I am the fool in the crowd
Yet I'm part of the out crowd only
I'm the ghost girl wisping by
The nobody you see
So messed up
The complete opposite of right
Perhaps the devils daughter
Could aphrodite and hades mate?
They seem to have made me
A darkness so full and complete
A never ending love filled to the brim
She is some new creature
I am
A mistake by the gods
The Queen
The Goddess of Heart break.
You were supposed to be my future
                                                             My Heart was yours
I thought we'd last forever
                                                       We lived through rough times and still cared
But caring wasn't good enough
                                                       I dreamed you'd be my husband
My future sons' father
                                                     We intertwined so perfectly
You can love someone else now
                                                                                             And apparently a whole lot longer
I was the vast sky and you were the stars that filled me
                                                                                            Now your my past
An aching that doesn't quit
                                                  When I think you've left my life
You appear like magic
                                                     To hurt me more
Wound a already broken heart
                                                    And watch as I go down
I loved you once upon a time
                                                                 But now I just wish you'd leave
Just like you did when we were together
                                                                     Except this time
Please don't come back
                                           You've caused enough pain.
You left me with a kiss
                             Your good-bye was the sweetness on my lips
      The tenderness
             The warmth
                       The comfort that I found nowhere else
Every kiss after
          Poison on my tongue
                          A sour taste that couldn't be killed

Their lips nothing like yours
           It is not their faults
               For you are the only one I truly loved
                    And for that every other mouth
Was like toxic waste on my lips
        Numbness at every battle
Knowing this was another fight my tongue would lose
     Out of disgust
I'm sorry that we kissed
  Because now I'm in withdrawal
And if I do not kiss one of my loves soon
       Every kiss may taste horrid
            And I certainly don't want that.


;P
May 2012 · 348
Wanted You Always
I Want You More Than Anything Else In The World
I wanted you before I knew I wanted you
I wanted you before I knew you
I wanted you before I knew me
I want you baby
Now And Forever.
You put up your battle shield
Pretended nothing hurt
But I could see the pain in your eyes
Why'd you bother getting high for me?
Did I sever something I thought did not exist?
Our war is a unsettled love
And even when we keep apart
They see
Some pair us
Because they see
The way I look at you
And the way you look at me
A deep pain we avoid
We could have been something
Should have been everything
Would have been perfect
But you were silent of your hearts yearning
And I was too afraid
And I ran
Now all we seem to be are strangers
But we know
The world knows
Even the imbeciles of this Earth can see it
Our eyes scream love and heart break
Even if we speak of hate and ignorance.
We were never anything
Just friends
But I loved you
And somewhere things got messed up
I hurt you
You hurt me
But my heart was still yours
You captured the real me
And every time your away
I'm here and incomplete
I love you
I want you
As friends
As more
As everything
And I know good-bye was said
Another may be on the way
Just know I don't want to let you go
Another good-bye could break my heart
So just look at me reluctantly
Say my name or a hello
Just stay in my life until we must part
And let me hope that day may never come.
May 2012 · 464
When We're In The Same Room
When we're in a room
even at a distance
I feel you

When I close my eyes
I hear your laughter
your perfect voice blessing the air

When I block out the noise
I see your smile
the dimples almost clear to see
Your long lashes
The lush lips that I want
your apperance that warms me

When I open my heart
I feel yours
the heart that hurt me
only when I hurt it
the heart I want
it's beating that soothes me
and takes away every bit of pain

When we're in the same room
I know I love you
and every other part of you
May 2012 · 370
My River Story.
Instead of tears
I'll cry a river of blood
Throw in the story of me
The heart ache
confusion
stress
innocence robbed
the abandonment
the lack of love recieved
and my every moment of pain
and then my river
It will cover the world.
I loved once upon a time
but he wore a crafty mask
made up of smiles
laughter
a defiant gaze
his brown eyes would shine
such hope was found there
his poor mask
worn by a cruel master
who turned out to be
only a fool
in the process of breaking my heart
I got to break part of his
and while I may never completely recover
I hope he doesn't either
because he doesn't deserve to be whole.
May 2012 · 344
Dear Hushboy.
You didn't understand
I loved you
Hell I still do
Not that I'd ever admit it
If I just pretend maybe It'll go away
But I feel it
Everytime you walk into a room
When ever our eyes accidently meet
And each time I hear your voice
I've said good-bye
And I've written it to
But My Heart Still Says Hello.
You meant nothing and I remember us
Holding hands
Kissing
And being what others desired.

You meant everything and I tried to forget
Our hands entwined
Our lips matching with every second
The love that emitted from my every pore.

You made me happy and I wanted to create things
Moments of love
Hands that never let go
Lustful times
And A future.

The only common factor is me
And how I ended up broken.
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