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chris Jan 2016
i promised myself*                                      

                                                             *i wouldn't cry
chris Feb 2016
please stay
chris Jan 2016
you are not mine,
but sometimes
i pretend that
you wish you were

i create this idea
that you secretly
want me

and i often forget
it's just something
i've made up
chris Oct 2015
i sit here,
watching the
darkness, as it
swallows the
light of the day.

i sit here,
while the
moon climbs
its way up to
the dark sky,
and settles
itself, on the
high chair of
clouds in the
sky.

i sit here,
while the
chilly wind
hugs me,
and takes
my thoughts
with them.

i sit here,
waiting for
something
that will
never come.

i sit here,
out in the
moonlit city,
gazing up at
the stars.

the stars,
that gleam
with hope.

i sit here,
watching
stars that
gleam with
hope and
desire.
chris Jan 2016
"i'm sick of people"
chris Jan 2016
DANCING IN THE DARK
IN THE PALE MOONLIGHT
chris Jan 2016
paper heat demise
convoluted happiness
ended with sad words
chris Jan 2016
we
build
walls
around
our
hearts
and
wonder
why
no
one
loves
us
chris Jan 2016
you said you'd be back
but then you left like that
chris Jan 2016
and now you hang out with

the people you said you hated.
chris Jan 2016
i'm a damsel in distress
where's my knight in shining armour?
chris Jan 2016
and i see me


and i don't like what i see
chris Jan 2016
i don't belong here
"you never did"
chris Nov 2015
and then i stood there

alone

feeling like

i was

nothing.
chris Feb 2016
did you ever love somebody

but the timing was off?
chris Nov 2015
when i get upset, i shut down.  i feel like i should be crying or
screaming or something but i can't because i'm turned off.  
i go silent and don't talk very much.  i just sit there, and think.
chris Jan 2016
it is such
a sad thing
to see
when a girl
falls in love
with the words
he says
rather than
the actions
he makes
chris Jan 2016
everything was lovely

when she loved me
chris Jan 2016
i run my hands through his hair
as he grabs my waist and pulls
me toward him and whispers,

*"i love you"
chris Feb 2016
you made me so ******* heartless
chris Jan 2016
maybe if we can use
     the darkness
           the torment
                 the shambles of our hearts and our heads
and turn it into something beautiful
      poetry,
            music,
                 artwork.
then maybe it won't be so
                                              bad.
chris Jan 2016
do you honestly think
forever exists?
it is the most beautifully created
illusion known to mankind.
crafted from lies
wonder, and hope
so please
do not promise me
what will never come.
chris Jan 2016
it's not wrong to cry

the sky has to rain sometimes

just know that i'm here
chris Mar 2020
i didn't used to be so weak

i'm usually headstrong.
never backing down.
optimistic.
confident.
happy.
when did it come to this?
chris Jan 2016
i guess goodbyes are the
only perfect things left for us
goodbye
chris Nov 2015
i said,
            "i want to jump out a plane
            or off a cliff or maybe
            the edge of the earth.
            i want to close my eyes
            and step into traffic
            or the ocean or maybe
            the bed of a stranger."

he said,
             "if you're looking to do
             something that terrifies you,
             why don't you just
             open up?"
chris Nov 2015
roses were red
violets were blue
no one could make
me happier than you

but

roses are now grey
violets are no longer blue
you left me when you realised
i had fallen for you
chris Jan 2016
but after a while
the small cuts become
big ones
and after a while
it doesn't really help
anymore so
you start finding other ways
to destroy yourself
like never sleeping and
drinking too much liquor and
kissing strangers and
letting your friends slowly drift away
chris Nov 2016
the more you love, the more you suffer
chris Jan 2017
make a story out of a story
chris Nov 2016
beating heart
closing eyes
blank mind
cold touch
numb feet
chris Dec 2016
i welcome death with open arms
and a small smile
chris Feb 2017
them butterflies they come alive
chris Feb 2016
and then i fell in love with you
chris Jan 2017
he stands behind her

         she is watching the blue sky

but he cannot fly
chris Nov 2016
choose me or lose me
chris Jul 2016

lost my senses
I’m defenceless
chris Nov 2016
baby, just say yes
chris Dec 2016
-

what do you care what i think anyway? i don’t even count, right? i could disappear forever and it wouldn’t make any difference.
chris Jan 2017
i don't think i have the capability to feel
chris Jan 2017
dreams…
…dreams

rain on you
in little drops
chris Nov 2016
highkey care too much
lowkey tryna hide it from you
chris Feb 2016
everybody wants to throw us away
broken boy meets broken girl
chris Nov 2016
they tried to bury us

but they didn't know

we were seeds
chris Mar 2016
listen to your eyes
chris Oct 2017
no matter what anyone said


                      I only lived how I wanted,


                                      guided by my own beliefs
chris Dec 2016
you must think that it's fun
picking up the pieces to my
already broken heart.
chris Feb 2016
playlist of memories,
play the happy thoughts,
stop the pain, loneliness,
and rewind the memories.
chris Mar 2017
i have never let anybody
try to decipher the code
that my heart beats in

✏︎

because i am much too
terrified that nobody
will care enough
to crack it
chris Jan 2016
a cup of coffee still sitting there,
i keep telling myself i'll be alright, i won't
i know it can't get worse than today, sitting here
she's trying to rehearse what she'll say,
she's in the bathroom, hoping i'm not in earshot
she's getting used to hearing the sound of her teardrops

splash, i hear it hit the towel
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