If I fail
To deliver this message
Remember what I do
No one can tell
How I feel for you
Times seem cold
Conversations have ended
No reason for what we do
The pain is there
So is the beauty
Emptiness may be haunting
But we still care

I will go
If you say so
Can't trust me
I understand completely
I'm not about drama and ****
Just stuck in the middle of it
But do I involve you no
It's not all I know
Yes I fight
Yes it isn't right
There's more to me
I protect persistently
I wonder if you care
If I share
Does it matter at all
If I text or call
You have things to do
I try to stay away from you
Your space I respect
So yeah protect
So I'm a friend
So let's not pretend
What do you see
A homie in me
If it's just game
Would be a shame
So with a smile
I'll be gone for a while
Not a choice I'll enjoy
But I'm a man not a boy
If you need a shoulder
When emotions colder
A ear to listen when troubled
My attention will be doubled
I know you're strong and tough
Yet sometimes it gets too rough
I'm drawn to you like a magnet
But this mistrust gets stagnant

I'm simple
Not much to see
Drifting here
Over there
Wasting time
Jotting a rhyme
Thinking heavily
About nothing
Silly right
Wasting time
Going nowhere fast
Shouldn't last
Expiration past
No one left to fight
Isn't right
Whatever
Seemed clever
But am I
So simple

There is pleasure
There is pain
This I treasure
Drives me insane
I've known joy
I've known misery
Simple little boy
Man fighting viciously
Tasted lips sweet
Left there heartbroken
My skipping heartbeat
Hurtful words spoken
Passion so intense
Loneliness even more
Just made sense
Just as before
Smiling all day
Dropping of tears
Happiness at play
Love just disappears
Floating on air
Drowning so fast
Hope is everywhere
It doesn't last
It's so clear
Yet I'm confused
Sublime in here
Emotions being misused

In my head
I do dread
What I see
Inside of me
Through the years
And the tears
I felt insane
From the pain
All the confusion
And the dillusion
There's no escape
From the hate
Years of abuse
And substance use
****** and ****
Fist they hit
Across my face
Frustration they misplace
Ugliness became me
Innocence ripped viciously
Saw a ******
I dove further
Insomnia now arrives
Nightmares now thrives
Beatings more violent
I'm more irrelevant
Let's fast forward
Life more horrid
Another ******* death
Friend's last breath
He committed suicide
Emptiness consumes inside
Youth in hell
Where I dwell
Gunsmoke choking me
Monsters hunting me
Now the cage
Woman's misplaced rage
Here's the twist
With my fist
With much force
I'm the source
A chilling beast
Wicked I feast
A menacing fool
Violence my tool
Scars go deep
No longer weep
Burden crushing shoulder
I grow colder
Bloodstained hands tremble
Now I resemble
What I despise
**** no surprise
Daughters ripped away
Shame on display
Tears soaking inside
Emotions must hide
People judging me
Reacting so ignorantly
When I'm down
Kicking me around
When I'm soaring
Good times roaring
Now I'm grown
I'm more alone
Hard to feel
Need to heal
I am dying
But I'm trying
But this rage
Is a cage
Do you see
Beauty in me
Is it there
I'm so unaware
Please I say
I'm on display
I do try
That's no lie

That child is gone
Left to die years past
Innocence did not last
Normally it's true
But this isn't the case
The trauma I try to erase
Isolated seems better
Avoiding love so long
It always feel wrong
How can I be open
When my emotions speak
I am labeled weak
Could I be so different
Why should I care at all
When only hatred comes to call
I can never breathe
Suffocated by my pain
With these nightmares I contain
What is normal or mature
I wish I knew
So I could share that with you
If I say I care
How if I stay away
Afraid of what I may say

Insomnia
I can't sleep
I can't sleep
I can't sleep
**** I'm tired
Exhausted not expired
So much transpired
Their hate inspired
So many desired
Heart on fire
**** seems dire
Some still conspire
Label me liar
You I desire
It is clear
I'm still here
I have fear
But I persevere
Suffering always near
What to say
Push me away
Strength on display
I don't play
Held at bay
So you know
Let it show
Let it go
Take It slow
We can grow
If we share
Will we care
Things weren't fair
If we dare
End this despair
Insomnia
I can't sleep
Nightmares still creep
May not weep
Still cuts deep
I can't sleep
Thinking of you
Away from you
Laughing with you
Snapping on you
Inspired by you
Insomnia