We started out as lust,
and quickly grew from there.

Now everything is different.
What we have is rare.

My fingers lingered a little longer
on the soft lines of your face.

Your kisses went a little deeper;
it was no longer a race.

Your embrace feels a little stronger.
None of this was planned.

My heart beats a little louder
the closer to me you stand.

It hasn’t been very long,
yet I know this is true:
without you, it feels wrong,
and I’m in love with you.

I've known you but a minute,
Though it seems to be forever.
You're an all important person,
Someone I'll remember.

Though time and ocean have seperated us,
The illusion of distance seems to much.
Yet I know well enough,
That soon I'll be able to feel your touch.

If distance was to great a feat,
I would give up, go home, stay away.
But I know better, only a matter of time.
And I sit here counting the days

Hear the words roll off
            his oiled tongue
Sweet song spills from
            his cunning mouth
Promises ooze from
            his chattering teeth

Be aware.
Not everything you hear
is a melody.

Lie in bed with me
                   For here my thoughts can flutter-
Become weightless but are not gone
For that I need you

Your hot pulse against
    My cold aura
                            ignites a light
that plays friendly hide and seek
                            with the dark
Because our deepest desires
            are those which shadows do hide

When the sun cries silently
and weeps across the sky
emotion shall crawl down my face
Us
    this bed does not wish to deny

I've just been broken into two -
The piece that stayed with me
and the piece that went with you.

Oh how I differ from
The youthful beauty of
A pale new flower

Velvet petals of orange,
A stem of vibrant green
leaves as young as I once was

As autumn brings harsh cold
A reining beauty shall fall
Join me and pass away

Your time has ended
As time takes its tithe
your life is now not

Oh Higher Power please!
-Please tell me what I need to know.
Why does my love for him not grow?

Is it stoppered with a blackened promise?
A hateful word, an unfaithful kiss?
Is there something to which I am amiss?

I do not wish to linger here,
drowning in what seems unclear
while suspicion does provoke a tear.
Oh, tell me what I need to hear...

I shall take whatever you care to tell
in the hope that my tears such knowledge will quell,
for not knowing shall inevitably drive me to my hell
Oh Higher Power please...

~Please tell~

The monster sneers
       you succumb
give up
            give in
The monster has total control
        of you
the situation
             your body
The monster is utterly devious
         holding you fast
pleasing you secretly
              manipulating your lust
The monster has what it wants
          your finished
satisfied
               writhihng in a naked sweat

That monster
~is me~

It uses the seatbelt as a vesicle
Slithers across your shoulders,
prickles your chest

With every beat
It pounds into your heart,
wiggles into your veins

You're infected
But it feels so good

Your blood forgets oxygen
and caters to the pulse
flowing throughout your systems

At once, Gravity remembers it's job
angrily it sinks to your feet
pools and tenses

Wearily it exits through the sole
spiders into the floor
the music has left you

You are forever infected
And it feels so good

Golden rays melt
into vast amounts of white
Not a drop of loss was felt
Unfortuneatly that was then
Unfortuneatly this is now

Sparkles used to be the only
Product of the light
When beauty was
just a silent grace
not a silent threat

Ice ruled humbly
A creature at its side
Magnificent and mighty
Paws like frosty boulders
Spirit intertwined with cold

Together they seemed
unstoppable
unbreakable   inseperable
They were unbeatable
So solid

As the gas fills the air
It allies with golden rays
And as the ice shrinks back
weakened, beaten, damaged
The icebear follows suit
Gems of the North are disappearing
going
going
Gone.

Poseidon's steeds rise from the ocean
silhouetted against the twinkling lights of an English village

They kick out at the sea,
making their presence heard.
Like the rumbling of a million bees,
it's hard to see,
but when you do they are magnificent.
Pawing the ocean,
stirring the current,
they rise above the rocks.
I look at the clock.
The horses are bringing in the tide
I might get stuck between the beach
and the thundering of hooves,
but I don't move.
I am still
while the ocean is in turmoil.
I toil.
Shall I retreat?
Shall I wait in defeat?
The horses call my name
offering a ride
to where?
I couldn't say but I kind of want to try.
I walk closer to the edge;
thank god it's not a ledge
or I'd never jump.

An arm wraps around me,
pulling me away.
But I feel the ocean, it wants me back.
His warmth wraps around me
and it puts me back on track.
I forgot I was cold.
I didn't mean to be so bold,
as to walk into his kingdom
and see the great unknown.

I'm resigned to this life,
walking among mortals.
After all it's not so bad,
when you have someone
that keeps you sane when you feel sad.

And** then the world breaks
Light is moved by shadows
Never will it be the same
Gave to us by misunderstanding
The upheavel we experience
Darkness rises from its hiding place
A new Earth begins to shape
Chance is given to those left behind
To regain their lost dignity
Shine like the new stars created by those lost

Lately I have found,
that pretty love
makes for prolific poems.

I'm finding that
a tender feeling
makes for tenacious terms
******* in rhyme.

I found that
a shared heart
makes for shy shrines
made up of secretive words.

As the people around me find someone,
I can't help but notice
the pretty poems,
and the prolific love.

I want to say something,
these words I can't keep,
but I'm afraid I'll lose you
after the tiniest peep.

I wish I could tell you
just how I feel,
but I'm afraid it's too much,
and you'll gasp and you'll reel.

I need to touch you
in the most gentle of ways,
but you're miles away,
the swim would take days.

I miss your voice
and your face
and your hair,
having to keep this inside
just doesn't seem fair.

I want you to shout out
how you feel about me.
I need to know
how you feel about me.
I wish you would tell me
how you feel about me,
so I can blurt out this passion
and finally be free.

I wonder what it sounded like
To hear a bullet whizz by your head?

I wonder what it felt like
When you realized you still had another day.

I wonder why you did it
why you put your life at risk.

I wonder what you were thinking
as your bullet swallowed a life.

And I wonder what you thought
when you realized you were going home.

The glory of war all but evaporated
With every round you shot
The spoils faded slowly
With every drop you spilt

The events that haunt you daily
Will try to make you fall
Your past will try to tag you
And so you build a wall

Your safe, no fear, no death
But you still fear death in safety
The poppy stills your thoughts
So you wear one
Remembering

It's been so long.
My vase has been empty
for fear of selfish gardening.
I had almost given up completely.

My favourite flower was always an orchid.
I thought I had found it long ago,
but it seems my orchid is a rarer breed;
it takes much more care to sow.

I happened across it on a lively night
in a garden full of flowers.
My lily had just turned to poison;
it's amazing what lust devours.

My orchid had seen many vases,
some much nicer than mine
and yet it chose to flower then
and look entrancingly divine.

For a couple years I watered it
from far away, safe from my touch of war
I was afraid that I would squander it,
like I had so many times before.

But the orchid was just like me,
adventurous and curious.
Though we couldn't be together
we let each other be flirtatious.

And silently we grew together,
and my orchid came to me,
and my whole world came together
even if only very briefly.

Now I sit here writing this,
looking at my orchid, in my vase, on my window sill,
and I look back at myself and realize;
I'm HIS flower, in HIS vase, on HIS window sill.

He won't go
He won't go
I whisper to the dark
lying on my back, arms crossed
of course he is going

He'll visit me
He'll visit me
I mumble to the shadows
trembling, trying to stay composed
I'll never see him again

He will call everyday
He will call everyday
I cry out to the moon
tears cascading down my face
I'll never hear his voice again

My nose plugs
My throat swells
My body quivers
and breathless sobs escape me

*That night I dreamed of all that could have been

Violence destroys more
Spreads faster
Lives longer
Burns hotter
Than wildfire

Violence tunnels into our hearts
Embeds itself deep within our souls
Turns us inside out, upside down
Corrupts our minds, taints our thoughts

Violence will not control us
Will not shape us
Will not mold our being

We will fight it
Destroy it
Combat it
Annihilate it
Prevail against it.

There is a cut on my chest.
You put it there

There is a tear in my heart.
It is you

There is a scar left behind.
It was you

Then you walked away
You broke me

My heart
My mind
My soul
My will

You cut a hole in my chest and tore the scar tissue away
You left and swore to me
That you would mend
The cut and the scar
That you would heal
The torn strings of my heart.

You lied.
But thats ok.
Because you tried.

I possess more love
Than that which I confess
But I speak not often of such
For should I happen to falter
I fear it would test
the faith of the rest
and doubt would shadow what's left

When...

I say "I Love You"
Do not be disheartened when that is all I offer
But enlightened
For under sound of tongue
are feelings to be sung

And so...

I veil more love
Than one seems to entail
But only because
I may not confess
what I possess

Seeing is believing,
though we often only look,
missing what we believe,
and seeing nothing.
What a funny routine to be caught up in.

They told me not to get involved
                 it wasn't for me to be meddle
Don't say anything
                 it will blow over
I didn't say a thing

She giggled and laughed
                he smiled and flirted
I was told not to say anything
                this can be skirted
I didn't say a thing

I was told to keep quite
                "you don't want to lose him
because he thinks you're clingy"
                 I shouldn't have listened
I didn't say a thing

I lost what was mine
                 to a girl with no morals
she took off with his heart
                 and left me regretful
*I wish I said something

I snap and lunge
       big dog on a long leash
I show my teeth
        wolf warning
I claw and paw the ground
         leopard to pounce

I cannot be responsible for my actions
when you back me into a corner
with all of your aggressive reactions.

I think my rose is wilting.
The vase chipping,
the thorns softening.

And the Lily calls,
a song on the wind,
a melody in harmony
with pedals and a euphony
of sounds so sweet.

My rose struggles to lift it's weary head
above the edge of the vase,
to look at me,
but I'm looking away.

And the Lily sings
sweet whisperings meant for my ears,
coalesceing me to where it grows
as pedals dry my tears.

I promised I would leave it,
protect it's sweet innocence,
but what does it want?
Can I really deny something that calls
to my very soul, my heart?

Oh, what could we start?

Thou art thine wings
        For souls do fly
             Unto thee

I wept a tear for you
A single, glistening droplet

Shunned from my eye
it cried as it fell
left me with a memory
as though it had a tale to tell

As it teetered on my nose
gravity ended its sovereignty of sorrow
and it fell again
this time to greet my pillow

There it remains
I can't believe I wept a tear for you

We fight and it is so heated
we say things that hurt and sting
we pang with pain and malvolence
And then we say goodbye.
Not, "Good bye hunny! Love you lots!! <3"
No.
Our good bye is brief and harshly punctuated.
And then we huff and puff and stew
Then we ask questions
At first they are angry questions, ones with no answers
"Why is he/she such a ******* *******?" "Why is he/she so stupid?"
And we stew some more...
Then we ask the right questions.
"I wonder why he/she feels that way.." "Why did I say that?"
And we stew, but in a different way now.
We think with our brains instead of our emotions.
And we begin to realize something important
We do not fight because we want to antogonize.
We fight because we are afraid of losing one another. Afraid of saying the last goodbye.
We mull that thought over and I don't know about you
but tears begin to escapre from my eyes and fall gently to my pillow.
Not racking sobs, just small, meaningful tears
I'm sad because I hurt you
I cry because I really hope I didn't make you cry.
I am sorry and I guess what I really want
is to say that to you.

*I'm so sorry...

Distance makes the heart grow fonder
And
Time makes our will grow stronger
But
Life makes our meeting harder
When
Oceans make it so much farther.

Will our love forever smoulder
Or
Will you let us grow colder?

The summer sun falls behind
a horizon of fire.
The last light of day
turns the sky into an ocean,
*and I let myself drown.

Sun fought on to keep the onslaught back,
Night smiled and sent his wispy minion,
who then cascaded down from the heavens,
covering all the land.

Weak beams tried to pry open the sky,
and take back Sun's rightful place.
Grey fog creeped into the scene,
and thwarted all hopes of escape.

Not all stories end happily.
Sun's rays were beaten and retired.
Fog thickened in triumph.
Night paraded in early.

The fog welcomed in the Night,
and the Night laughed at the Sun.

You are in control
I thought maybe I was
         oh boy was I wrong

I thought I had the upper hand
the only reason it was upper
        was because you pinned it there

I mirror your movements
because mirror is all I can do
         if I am to keep up with you

Take control
Take the lead
        take me

I crash
My mind hits the rocks
The tide sweeps away hope
Prevention was in the clocks

Time was ticking
The old father knew
sooner or later
Reality would blast a hole brand new

My beliefs and my Hope
My imagination ran wild
Malicious Reality intervened
Cunning Fate sat back and smiled

In one brief moment
All I thought was real
Laughs in my face
The vault is resealed

Realizations hit me
I sit and I cry
I am left beaten and empty
Silenting hoping no one will pry

Love and Faith
Take pity on my soul
The ways of the world are not my own
And carefully, I fill in the hole

Oh, the frosted trees
the North Wind blows
like delicate skeletons
at home in the snow

Sway and shed
your frosty attire
down warm necks
like icy spires

There is fun to be had
in the frost bitten forest
dropping wint'ry surprises
all over the tourists

It is sad to think all fun
must come to an end
as the warm sun smiles
to melt malicious pretend

The cold creeps into my fingers;
it lingers and I shiver.

The ice pushes into my core;
I adore the sensation.

I can't feel my face,
or my toes, or my hands.
I don't understand why...

...my skin prickles,
the cold tickles,
as it moves in ripples.

It feels good.
This feeling.
I feel alive,
I can thrive.

The cold seems just that,
but it's old and familiar.
Like a friend
here to mend
the heat of pretend.

I knew I should have left it
alone where it grew.

The lily is wilting
it quivers and shakes.
My selfish hands have killed it
waiting for another to take its place.

The orchid has gone sour
its petals ooze a poison.

It grew so far away I thought
another would surely tend it.
Oh how I was wrong,
now I'll sit here trying to mend it.

It seems I'm a selfish gardener
and though I wish it not so,
I know that I have damaged
what I wished to grow.

From the flowers that I hoped to till,
it's punishment that none will be
the flower, in my vase, on my window sill.

With eyes like fire
and breath to match
Fear swoops in on us
Wings ablaze
Tail like a whip
Hate wells up
Legs scream power
Talons ooze poison
Terror cries in our hearts

And with Fear, Hate and Terror
Comes, distrust, misunderstanding
prejudice.
A mighty Dragon is slain
An emblem of Earth destroyed
All because we didn't wait
We judged, misjudged
Now we have lost a great creature

I have a flower, in a vase, sitting on my window sill
There are no other flowers on my window sill
        Just a rose.
This rose is special,
It hasn't died since I picked it.

The life of this rose depends on me.
No other flowers can exist on my window sill,
No other flowers can fit in the vase.
Just that flower, in that vase, on my window sill.

Walking through a garden, I see another flower.
Better than the rose in some ways,
but not in others.
      This flower is a lily.
My heart immediatly begins to tear in two.

So now I face a dilema.
Pick the lily, or let it die.
Keep the rose, or let it die.
Either way, one must die.
And I am stuck between two beauties.
I need a flower, in a vase, on my window sill.

So I delve deep.
I think broadly.
I remember something.
My favorite flower is an orchid.
I have a feeling my orchid is in a distant garden,
waiting to be picked --
       by me.
This orchid will be
My flower, in my vase, on my window sill.

And so I can live with the outcome of the lily
      or the rose
And I just hope they don't die
that someone else's favorite flower
     is a lily
     or a rose.
Because I know that something is going to happen
that will bring me closer to my favorite flower.
So I must be patient.
And just wait for
My perfect flower, in my perfect vase, on my window sill

The eerie and the creepy,
come out to play in the early,
hours of the night.
If you are afraid of the dark,
stay out of the park

Soon the goblins and the ghosts,
will be your spooky hosts,
waiting on your fears,
serving up your tears

They'll bask in your fright,
for it fuels their night,
taking advantage of you,
then the taunting turns cruel

Stay behind locked doors,
for the graveyards, battlefields, and moors,
are coming back to life,
and looking for your strife

You're just beyond that door.
I can see you beckoning me through the window.
My heart races.

The key fits, but the lock won't turn.
It burns.
I yearn.

My mind whirs and my heart beats
My bones creak
My stomach lurches
My organs motor on.
Yet, for all of this,
I am calm.
I am serene.
I sit quietly,
despite my machine.

I'm falling awake
yes it can be done
wakefulness falls upon you
just as effectively as sleep
your mind clears
your eyes flutter
you yawn
It is very possible to fall awake

I especially enjoy falling awake
to grinace at you,
yes, grinace.

I need to forget; the fun we've had
I need to progress; leave behind the past
I need to believe; I am worth everything she is
I need to remember; you're only one person
I need to look back; not repeat the past

The power to be someone else,
to live a different life,
make different choices.
Oh what a power that would be.

What if I told you,
that you could?

You could choose to be
a scientist
a doctor
an activist
a lawyer
a volunteer
anything that you wanted.

What if I told you,
you could learn from your mistakes,
make new choices,
and new mistakes?

What if I told you,
it is as simple as

Change. Determination. Choice.

My rose is not just any rose,
It is very special, one-of-a-kind.
The keeper of the vase on my window sill

The lily that I found,
So beautiful, so delicate, so pure,
So unbelievably uncorrupt,
I couldn't pick it.
My fingers I fear,
Wouldn't fail to wither it.

See, my rose has thorns,
a tough outer layer.
The lily is so soft,
So delicate,
I couldn't risk the chance.
So I offer just one last glance.

I will leave the lily where it grows,
To dodge my trowel, and those of others.
Until it finds the tenderness of real love
to pick it from its lonely plot of soil.
Where it will sit on someone's window sill,
in a vase, thriving in all the spoils.

A rose by any other name
would smell as sweet

A rose gazed upon through tears
can never be as meaningful
as the day it was given in
love

Black streaks race down
the flushed flesh of my face

A rose that stood for love
now stands for something lost

A rose sways solemnly
in a bed of forgotten flowers
the life ****** from its
youthful petals
though Death will ne'er take it

A rose by any other name
has thorns that pierce

These words you said
fall down my face
even after they have dried
their route I still trace

We love from afar
and take no part in the fear
but sometimes we break
and we let out a tear

From where we both stand
our hearts far apart
we know what we've planned
to bring them to start

Yet there are moments
when life is too much
and a double edged comment
makes both of us lurch

Love is doubted
loyalties challenged
tears break the glass
and all that we've managed

Do not fear
what we can be free of
just remember that no matter what
It will always be you I love

These tears you make me shed...
we can still be rid of.

The silence across the ocean stirred
my worry
was silently creeping up on me

Idle thoughts grew and peaked
my interest
caused me to speak to you

My sun that sets a world away
grew cold
or so it seemed to me

You shine upon another
and who am I to judge?
The little pangs of jealousy
still hurt
they still sting my eyes.

I don't know if you'll be back someday
to shine on me once more.
If you do I hope you're closer
so we can shine together
and I don't have to feel the sting
of losing you anymore.

You are my dream; you are my wish, my sun –
You shine like hope, and I need that today—
You are my only, it’s to you I run,
When skies are grey, illuminate my way.
I don’t think you know, you are very rare,
Dear, my love grows with every breath I take,
You are unaware of how much I care,
A reason to live is what you will make.
So please don’t close your eyes, I’m always here,
Don’t take my sun away, just keep shining –
Now that you’re here, there is nothing to fear,
So now I must ask something defining.
Why don’t you spend forever just with me?
The sun shall never set upon our tree.