Nothing

Nothing Nov 2013

Untitled

Can I
Chop off all my hair without anyone noticing?
Who would really care.
Can I paint my body deep, bloodred and
Purple because thats how i feel?
Would anybody
Anyone?
Ask if im okay?
Can i see a show of hands
A count of maybe two
Because like in PE, they are raising their hands,
Supporting halfheartedly a decision they
Havent made.
Are the warning signs coming true?
What if i gave away my bike,
My books?
Things i loved, things that were part of me.
Stripped away.
Would someone notice,
Say "hey, you're not okay?"
Its pretty hopeless so why
Am i still here?
Im not worth it
And you're living in a ball of fear.
Uncurl yourself,
Your shell is too thick.
When you dont let me in,
Maybe you'll wish you did.

Nothing Nov 2013

Black Hole

You would think
That everyday that i don't do it,
Is a day I've survived.

But in reality,
Everyday i suspend,
I sink further into this
Black hole
Pit of nothing that is
Eating up everything.

I can truly see the light for you,
It's only a little on ahead.
You just keep pushing,
Leave me for dead.

Nothing Nov 2013

Lock and Key

A long time ago,
I locked away my heart and soul.
Took the key, threw it away.
No one really knows, even to this day.

You think you know it all,
Everything about me.
You don't, not even i do.
Primarily,
You don't know what I'm afraid to tell you.
So i keep everything locked up;
Its better that way.

Whenever i've ever
Told someone something personal,
Given them my
Unbroken trust,
They've held it in their palms,
Told me it was precious.
They when i unlocked,
They squeezed it
So tight it split.
Its been taped, roughed up,
Bruised,
So many times,
Its barely there.

The darkness is a veil,
A thin black sheet in front of everything i do,
I can't escape,
Can never see through.

A weird compilation of thoughts and bits of everything else.

Nothing Nov 2013

Heart of Glass

So easily shattered
Shards pricking picky fingers
Trying to put pieces back together
Impossible.
Leaving blood drops
Drips
Ruining pristine white.

Nothing Nov 2013

Escape

B A N G
You hear the slam of the front door and flinch because
The worst and best woman in the world
Is home.
6:04
The question is,
Four minutes late which person will she be tonight?

Fast forward
10:04
And her blurred english runs with the fourth glass
Of jack daniels that night.
You try to stay out of it,
But soon,
M and her are screaming.
Unseen,
You escape carfully,
Quietly
Fearfully
To your room,
Its always best to wait out a storm.
S L A P*
And you can hear fist connecting with jaw
What next.

11:04
You hear
Him try to stop her,
But
Every
Single
Time
Its too late, no use.

11:33
You call me.
Its not uncommon for me to get these texts:
Hey. Sorry its late. Im coming over.*
And you creep out of your home in the dark
And crawl to mine.
My mother always questions the
Black under your eyes,
The blue of your lips,
The purple of your jaw.

Is a house really a home when
You're completely alone?

Nothing Nov 2013

Promise

another thing
that someone else is
grasping tight to,
knuckles white,

just for it to slip away

broken

i lied

Nothing Nov 2013

You Are

You are
Poetry.
The way your tiny, nimble fingers
Flow freely up and down the frets,
Reminds me of the way you can sing and
Get lost in a song,
Everything almost forgotten.
Reminds me of the way you could probably
Spit bars accurately like someone who
belongs,
Because everything else comes so easy;
Why not?

You are
Music.
The way you write
Seems to hum harmoniously with the tune of
Mournful sadness or
Drowned happiness.
The music of you enthralls all
Capturing, reminds me of the story you carry,
A twisted
Fairy tale,
Scribbled in scars and watercolor
Inscribed on pages of forgotten notebooks.
Trailing off, leaving a sweet, high, melodic note
Haunting
With a flourish.

had a lot of inspiration for this one.
happy birthday.