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Niranjan Jul 2020
About the girl in yellow


Not so long ago,
I met a friend of my own
We had a time of short
where we explained each other what we saw.

Grey or white buildings in the horizon she said
Endless night skies i replied
The gang of vagabonds blabbered about ***** and women inside
whilst the vagabond outside blabbered to a girl in ecstasy

Quarrels and intervals came along
Not for long but for eternity i thought
The way i missed it, i missed it like none other
They way i cried about it, i cried about it like none other

Then came the mystic fog
Blurred up the past even the future for both of us
but at present i had a lamp
for me the fog was clear

Then there came a time i stumbled upon a friend i thought was long lost
Now she meant something more
As i knew i saw her inner light
Now it reflected on me as to guide me in the nightstorm

A storm so dark and dusty
as i coughed and cried my lungs out, preaching to the all known for a better way out
The light, the inner one took me and put me aside as an irish selki

Now i see in a better state
Better worse or better good yet to find out
Nonetheless iam calm as i hear her whispers

Breeze in my hair
I exhale and inhale good air
Unpredicted lustful reactions in me as i hear each word.
Maybe of grief or of gold it tickles in all of me

When i dream i am her
I think like her
I move like her
I talk and i hug and i kiss like her to myself
Here, i am no different
theres no shame in being a feminine while masculine
I am the way i dreamt about you
The way i thought
About the girl in yellow.
Niranjan May 2021
Kiss me she said,
I kissed her hard.
Now with more effort
'My Lips', she said.
I kissed her hard,
but shook her head
and came more close.
"The other lip", she whispered.
Niranjan Mar 2021
She slid my hands through her thighs and wishpered, " Your parchment, your pen, now write that poetry as our lips moisten sippin on each others words.”
Niranjan Aug 2020
Humane
.
.
No one stood up for me...
No one stood up for me...
I overheard this and I didn't even move a muscle
Niranjan Aug 2022
Lacing your moon with something of mine
In search of flashes...
I remember,
your scarf, red as i recollect....
Oh my, it had small stitch bumps,
now i remember.
The day was a literal sunshine,
i long and long for even more of those meets.
We listened to Damru..
We sat and read what all We've been writting..
A critic of a kind you are...
a nihilist of other sorts too.
yet, that is true it seems...
Your eyes were dialating as the moonrise on the 7th of May.
You remember May, don't you?
That's the day i had my hands inside you.
That's the day i felt what you are in flesh and not in mind.
And in that process
i found what you thought about, even things you are yet to know.
Inside you.., while we looked at each other.., without breaths..,with ecstacy
And inside, my hands searched for a pen to write all of this and a cigarette to smoke.
Niranjan Jul 2020
Last letter to Maya

Maya ,
I could hear the living
as i closed my eyes....
while when opened ignorance was a godly gift

A godly gift
of every man
ignorance liketh thee
as thou liketh ignorance
And as i am ignorant
         as ignorant i am

Maya,
I don't care for myself
as i thought i am no mortal
just as ignorance..,
'Twas stupidity

Maya ,
I am fed up
Discomforted , numb , beaten down ,
scars of lashes upon my woven back..
Woven with silk but covered by calluses of burdensome
I heave of being tired
every time i close my eyes

Maya,
'Twas the day i saw the beach
In sand i stood as i heaved for forgiveness
I walked to water
and found Im no God

I closed my eyes,
what a beautiful sight
I closed my eyes and heard the living,
It said .......
Niranjan Dec 2023
I saw a lynx as you left..
The dusk fog lighter, a bitter sweet brighter that makes it clear...
  Under the nest, by the trees.. The mythic lynx who sees through walls..
  Unravels hidden truths, the clairvoyant cat.
The nest up, holds our folk.
Each twig making sense, each twig an essence.
The wind may come, it could knock the nest.
The mythic fox in the blue, light dust, lighter fog,
Shows of a fire from faraway land.
The wind may come, carrying it, it could come.
Ashes could be carried in the following wind to the next cove.

Seedling are born when a hand plants them.
A stranded seedling is an act of war, not of logic.
The war s within, invicible within the folk you've built, above the lynx in the nest you've built.
Remember, the lynx is mythic, it has clear vision.

   A child's eye captures amazement in all..
   A broom is a horse, a stick is a sword.

A farmers duty is to water and love.
As it is essential, it's another twig, another part.
Unguided rage will bloom in those,
who were never touched by the farmers hand.
As that hand disipates the folk disipates.

One more thought, the lynx sighs.
Your horse neighs, the path is thick.
It neighs when hope seems far.
The path is thick the fog is bigger.
Travel safely, reach home early.

The lynx bows when in retreat,
I bow in respect.
The wind is coming, have to prepare.
The fallen twigs can be put togather again.
Niranjan Jul 2020
Made love

Its affection ,not in your beauty but in your beauty
Even when you are miles away i feel you close to my lips
Im moist even the scorch melts down the clouds within

Your lips i crave for..,
a touch, not from the fingertips but from the wet upper lip..
I'll bite them soft as you close your eyes in the essence of our kiss

I close my eyes
now not far but near as
i drift wavy in my sleep
And,
the ***** i have when i
wake up is the love thats
left within
Niranjan Dec 2023
Dire thoughts of abandonment were the first to rush in..
The family, the folk would tear apart.
From hatching, catching flight and wandering,
  a bird's life writtten in stone.
Each twig collected with joy, each effort painful as it is made with hope.
With it, built, the nest, the folk.
The day of the high winds, dusk and dawn,
with it dust, debris and perils of another land.
Saw the nest, knocked on the ground
In disorder existence becomes unnatural.
In disorder existence becomes meaningless.
The nest, the folk, its debris on ground..
In disorder existence becomes a replica.
A hand can make us whole.
A thought escapes my mind,
  of ever being whole..  again..

A desire to be whole becomes an illusion.
Niranjan Oct 2022
Ode from an Asylum

He called me and called me and once more it happened.
Could feel the sadness that glooms in his voice.
Could feel the clouded future in his head.
Imaginary, invisible shackles chained to his limbs
Marks of swollen skin ankles and wrists.
Eyes black, insomniac. Even though sleep was there by side.
Nonsense, Nonsense, No sense of Euphoria in anything done. Felt his way, d
Felt his anger, saw the act he did for me. Hardly he kept it, tiredly his soul seemed.
In shackles he is, In shambles he is.
Tired he is, gloomy he is.
Voice breaking with intervals of laughter.. is it for real or are they for me.
I fear of failure. Failure of me and failure he never was.
Cannot see him go into the abyss, where buildings are down under with windows not built.
Help he wanted, asking he was not.
I knew, help he wanted, which i am not aware of.
Help he wanted, someone help me.
Help he wanted, nowhere to be seen.
Niranjan Aug 2020
Room

Im in a room filled with books wine and music
In the corner there is  a bench where my cat sleeps in peace along side the flowers i just bought...lillies.

Through  the window i could see sunlight even when its night..
After all its always morning but barricaded by the clouds.

Theres a sewer outside the room which has a pleasant aroma cause it holds the rich peoples waste..ain't that true..?

Im in my good clothes..i smell good...i have shoes..and my arms are crossed
Still ican't stand up, i cant move..like the earth is above me..

My room is clean but not to others..
They see sand in it flesh in it rotting..degrading
After all they put me here..,in my coffin

And i'll be here in my room for the rest of the time cause above me my tombstone reads
I was there
I am here and
I will be there..
Niranjan Sep 2020
Sleep well my child

So many ways we part the sea,
still always a bowl not free from thee.

Taverns were full
Streets were empty
Corners with rags
and lust reek of
blood and puke.

Lullaby's were heard from far up towers
Towers of guards with guns and nukes.
Their chants of stories make them doze...
Goodnight, sleep-well
if you wake up it's luck

Most men dead if       sins they've done
Most men living with praise of sins
Stories of women with lavish lives reeks of greed and lustful crime.

Along came wars of race and hood
Along came slaughter of love and care
Along came mornings with smell of blood
Along came nights of wandering souls

Sirens were heard in  
place of roosters
Lights were dim in
place of moon
Knives were used to  
part and share
Well know its used
to **** all thoughts

So, sleep-well my child the fire will rise..
Better luck next time if you are shot.
Niranjan Oct 2020
Statue By the River

A stone white statue was built
by someone on the banks of
the foggy river by the pines

The statue was sitting on a
wooden bench,
the way it was built
white as snow and lone as the artic

The day came, that i saw
A man sitting there with the
statue of a lady, white as snow
and lone as the artic

A distant view i had of them
He held her hand as if
trying to get a part of her
sadness...whilst looking at a
pale eye with a dead stare

I thought to myself
why the sculptor made this,
if to e left lonely by the banks

The man talked and spend time with her
in a way as if she was alive
by each day the pale woman was more and more alive

I had seen him laughing with her
I had seen him contemplating
the beauty of the foggy river with her

The day came i saw him on her lap
resting his head while crying
as she moved her fingers through his fine light hair

That day she was more human than any of us coukd ever be...

Feeling ones pain and sitting there in scilence,
contemplating, it was more human than any godily miracle

I gazed upon my hand,
to see me holding the statue the other day
looking at a pale eye with a dead stare....
a drop of tear
           of joy
           of completion

Now i know why the sculptor built this..,
not to e left lonely y the anks of the foggy river
But,
for the ones who are left lonely
Niranjan Aug 2020
Train to

The train to the place was long
thick,hot,and locked..

Friends..,Indians..,countrymen...
People from all corners gathered in a long chain of dispensary boxcars..
waving their hands in traverse

A little girl stumbled upon the wilderness of the gang...
Laughing while taunting the gang
And crying while rejection of her taunts..

Nomadic **** the gang smoked
whilst  boxcars swept the wind along with the exhales...
the roads and the boxcars dazed...

The chain started to shrink..
those countrymen slept.., it became cool and everyone was liberal...

The train to the place was all that moved...
Niranjan Aug 2020
Tranquil taste

Nothing was too short
not even sorrows of light and dawn or even the virtues which she still beholds..

Not many were able to see
the glimmer that made them glow..
Not many were able to hear the tales of fortune left behind.

What was she a garden of solitude or a grave of fireflies
Or imagine being a garden full of fireflies  
were stars came down and skies teased them back

Not wind nay storm
Nor flood of any kind
No cries of immortal pain
Never starve for unwanted graves
Or ever beg for blasphemy in love..

She may uphold the virtues she had
the world may think of creeps and crawls
While she may think of nothing but more
than a blissful moment of tranquil taste.
Niranjan Jan 18
I found this person one day in daylight of December.
Sleepy eyes felt a bit uptight and never expected to be connected..
This person turned out to be the person i needed.
I needed this companion, this beautiful soul..
To laugh was easy, vulnerable so much.
This person, this friend has a unique quality.
In the sense, this person can talk, I mean talk straight.
This person, this soul, can see through walls..
Shakes me, traps me, till I drop my act.
It's new that an influence like this can clear things up.. More like it's rare that someone can tear right through..
The prince of my barren ego went out for a walk
The door is still open, wait, if he comes back..
Niranjan Aug 19
I have my pills my love but i forgot how much i took
Light white is emerging from both sides of my eyes
I feel a slow rundown of cool wind down my spine, something up and coming down from my gut..
this shiver up my spine reaching my neck
air slowly retreating out of my ears,
out of my mouth
My vision fully white now and all I here is an echo of my heart
It’s getting far, its fading, its leaving like a train from its station.
Niranjan Aug 2022
Edo, don't worry about the things you hear.
It's all a happening.
Everything happens as to let you know,
these are what you have to bear.
What you lack, lack in life.
Lack in life that tears you apart,
which you always lick from
which you take for granted.
My Dear,
Don't be sad.
Don't be sad when I'm with you.
Tell me all that makes you numb.
I will,
We will,
Make it love.
Your confusions & anger is always natural.
Neutral in ways it or ee help you through.
Signs these are, realisations these are.
Nowadays we stink in our own shoes.
Move to the other persons shoes,
find what they are.
Move to the other and look at you.
You'll see what you lack,
You'll find what you lost.
Go Vaanaprastha.
Meaning,
Find your jungle, go for an exile ,
look back home and see what's happening, through which you see what you did, what happened and what all you took.
What made your head weigh and bow down,
Even when you pushed your muscles to hold it  Up.
It's normal and beautiful to die,
By killing your most minute ego.
By devouvering the skins of those creatures
that hold you in chains.
It's a dual choice to go which way.
Choose yours by knowing yourself,
by finding what you are,
When someone asks.
Speak of who you are in terms of what you do.
   What you read &
   What you listen.
   What you consume &
   What you excrete.
       Rather than,
   Where you come from &
   Where you are going.
   No more tears.
There is no such thing Dear I am here.
It's all nothing but what is now.
Like these moments of time
while reading each of these words.
The breath you take in each second,
as it passes, as it goes away while you were thinking of me.
You were my Early wind,
that brought me  Streams.
Streams of water straight from them hills.
You were the wind which made me walk.
Remember who you were
To me you were the wind, the wind, the wind,
Those early winds.
Early winds i still cry for.
Look for,
The picture of the person that
comes into your mind &
The smell that lingers when seen out of sight.
The smell I found,
Your beautiful smell i found,
Found before a time where
we hadn't even met.
The smell i thought was a myth,
But,
Found in time.
In time, everything happens,
In time, you find what you long for.
When we do it by surrendering ourselves.
Listen to music,
Dance till exhaustion,
Let those sweats fall,
Let the ego burst,
Let me love you &
Let me hold you.
Let me feed you &
Let me have from you.
Everytime you do this,
The healing is done.
Everytime this happens,
It's always a happening.
Hugs & Kisses,
Wake upto me.
It's 6:26 am,
4th of Aughust and im thinking of You.
Niranjan Oct 2022
Your walls don't deserve me
(A conversation)

Had been thinking of ways to end this.
Rapid beats of unusual jazz on my weary skin.
The feeling of being left out
feels like a grape being plucked out and thrown away due to the bitter taste.
Taste, taste, ******* ecstacy.
Drown with me till the last bubble.
Drench in the nights where clouds bring no rain.
Nothing can hold me, I'm not water.
Nothing can entrance me, I'm not wide eyed.
I'm not who you thing &
I don't know what i think.
You can push me to your wall and
paint me all over.
I'll still slide and push you away.
You can throw ropes at me like a mid-west ranger.
I would swirl and dance through the knots.
You can even call a mystic and summon my soul.
Won't be there, its been dead for decades.
You cannot, you cannot hold me, you cannot capture me.
Stand by your wall, stand on your side.
Stand by your voice, stand on your greed.
My place is nowhere &
My place is everywhere.
Now, what do you say, what do you have to say.
.
.
"Nothing much but only this,
Oh dear, even my own walls don't deserve me"

— The End —