Lost another from home, lately I feel like I'm a be more alone. Due time the fear of getting closer, I don't want to be sober. Wish they didn't leave the family tree where the branch broke, now the branch is in the dirt. Hearing the news really ******* hurt.
Everyone here? I'm lost and I'm a have me a beer. Can't really hear, my mind isn't clear.
The drink isn't strong enough, you're just so ******* young! I'm a give this bottle of whiskey a good chug! You've always had my love! You were like my brother! You and the others! A happy broken family, I can't believe this **** we was always so happy! Wasn't much but it was real! Now I'm sipping whiskey ugly crying to deal.
It was you that took me in when no one gave a ****, it was you to cheer me up when I was down. I've always owed my world to you and all you wanted was my loyalty.

I wouldn't trade love for the world, but I'd trade my world for love. A beautiful soul? I think my personality would be more than enough. I've beat myself up for the sake of mental health! Not once had I attempted to seek help. Sober today..... Gone tonight, I best put my self on do not disturb so I can avoid a fight. Had a girl once tell me I've got a beautiful crack in my smile, just a tad broken. Tender, love, and care should do the trick. Her being around was more than enough. Just like my broken smile she had left, left me with a frown. I guess I shouldn't allow anyone to pick me up when I'm down. Vulnerability stays open, I just refuse to allow ya ******* to see me broken.

I apologize for taking forever, to be honest I'm just trying to puzzle others back together. I'm forgetting my mental health can't take any longer, I'm forgetting simple tasks and I've stored **** in my locker. Hours of contemplating with concern got me to drown deeper in water, it got cold but it burns as if it got hotter. They'll never get the chance to comprehend my feelings because not one but most forget to pay attention. Especially when I'm expressing my words with passion. But depression for them had to happen. It's no different than talking to my pillow because when I'm depressed I lie down too. Faith in my ears for others for me to listen too. My lips go through the motion but not a sound left, now I've got no idea what to do. It's a far road to one's heaven, but it's closer to a loved ones hell. Suicide is everyone's option, but there's always some sort of help. I wish the losing streak wouldn't belong to mental health. If I've got to be there I'll be the last one to know, because I'm mentally afraid of having to be at another funeral. Please just call, it's not worth leaving this planet. You've got my love and now my attentions are woken up here ya go you can have it.

**** never works, I've been choked up I forgot how to use my words. I swear I've been bad luck since birth, probably will continue til I'm under the dirt. But I swear I've got some worth! I don't compare or compete my trauma from his or hers from better or worse. This isn't a race nor a challenge. I swear to God I'd help one in need. But for **** sakes I forgot how to feel complete. Just ******* lonely in all honesty. Last thing that never happened was some false hope, now I'm alone. Fat and broke. Just enough to get by, the last one I liked asked for every cent. But my attention had to be spent. I said no more and blocked the witch, I'm no one's ATM nor anyone's *****. If I'm being honest I'd rather have be alone, beats having a fake. It's just a shame there is so much potential, I just want to rise with someone and feel special. Maybe even.... one day be successful.

I'm a man, I'm a good man.
This is what I don't understand....
I'm not the best, but I'll be the best you'll ever have. I'll always kiss the scars on your back. But this is what I don't get...
I'm a man not a bank. I'm trying to date. But lately I feel like your ATM, why must I pay for a smile or a compliment. But get degraded and unhuman when I say no. **** man, why must I become the ghost. Rest in peace the dating life. It's not like I can help every broke girl. I am just trying to be that man but not that loan. Might as well stay alone. Because now my motivations in the negatives.