I know there isn't much I can do. But the thought of you harming yourself pains me in every way possible. The thought of you depressed kills me slowly. This is suffocating me because I'd love to take the pain away from you. There is a pound in my chest that takes my breath away. The weight on my shoulders brought me to my knees. My darling I know it's tough right now, it will take a long time to be okay. It really will. But I'd love to be your dose you take to suppress your fears. I can't say I'll always be there to save you, but I'll always be here to treat you.

She told me she fell for me, raked up a good side of me. Love piled like leaves. Before I fall, what do you plan on doing? How am I of worthy? No one understands it because I'm normally lonely. I talk to myself more than anybody. She fell for me? My love tried to hide but she found it for me.

A lot of you know about my paranoia,
I don't need the vouchers for the trips.
I've got a pass to relocate anywhere, but I chose to fight back. **** a anxiety I know I deserve better than that. I stomp the nope ropes chilling in my lawn, I stitched the wounds from my back. But I still managed to fall in the trap. Guilty of sin, in love with the pleasure. Ask my journal who clearly understood better. I wrote depression a love letter. But I'm a marry the greatest depression.... just to divorce it. Teach the darkness a lesson, light up my heart because self love will be my only weapon. A shot hit me to catch a buzz. Drunk mentally, sober pain. Back to square one, anger taunting me with a hit and a run. But I demand myself to stand my ground. Can't find me because I'm out in the open. You're searching for the broken. But I've made the repairs, my paper held me together with a pen. You can shred me all you want. I'm not about to let the anxiety to win, even if I have to refund my pass to return to hell. I'll dig up my demons to **** anxiety up. No amount of paranoia will take flight once I'm free. I'm a fight for me.

I don't want to just fall for love, I want love to fall for me. Simply or simply not meant to be. Either way I found myself lonely. I've got scars and flaws to make up. But sometimes tear drops wipe them away, sleeves can only cover so much. Just please don't hurt me the way I've hurted myself. For that I refuse to seek out help.  There was a illusion that filled my head. I don't want to classified as delusional so I keep **** myself instead. With the fear surrounding my fall, I find myself deeply in love with false hope. I predict no future but I predicted what would hurt the most. Little did I believe, I said I dint feel no ghost, but I'm haunted by any attention. I'm a open person, I forget to close my heart. A warming person who feels cold from the start. I've been so close as I've been distant and I know that's my bad habit. But how do you quit a bad habit if there wasn't even a commitment? Just feels like I'm wasting time finding no achievement. I don't think I can settle to anyone's agreement. I've always known me less, but others the best.

I know she ain't really been a mom. Everyone ended up leaving you in town. Life's been a mess lately with out dad. We hide depression by being upset and mad. This is the life I didn't want for you. I really wish there was a thing I can do. But we're Hall's we always pull through. Kills me knowing there isn't a solution. I wished you to have everything for you to receive nothing. My hearts breaks, I die a little. I cried a bit. Now I sit, now I wonder... what would dad do?