Yesterday was really cloudy
Todays really sunny
But I'm just as bipolar
I've been cold all season and winters just about over
Been ready for a change
But this month is full of storms and rainbows from the rain
Some sunshine for us to go out and play
Next weekend it'll be warm and foggy
Hours later it'll be bright and muggy
That's to be expected from sunshine's & rain

I can't help to have a episode.
I enjoy the discomfort a bit too much.
Maybe I enjoy it all being rough.
I know I'm mentally weak,
Sometimes I can't sleep.
I sometimes don't eat.
I need help but I forgot how to speak.
I don't wish this struggle upon anyone else.
I still struggle with this mental health.
I swore upon god that I'm in hell.
My guardian Angel had fell.
Can't increase anxiety any further, this is a dark place I know far too well.
I want this pain to cure my episodes.
But I am also afraid of being hurt.
Am I a masochists'?
Am I just ******?
I've attempted to find help.
But destruction was the first responder.
Guilt hit me up after.
Depression gave me a place to stay.
Guess what anger brought me?
  PTSD

I've been paralyzed as soon as the light leaves me.
Paranoid by sound because every sound I hear maybe sinister.
I grip my blankets as if I were in a safe zone.
The darkness creeps on me when I'm alone.
I swear the silence in this area Screams at me to get out.
I don't want to be here.
I just want to sleep in peace,
but I fear I'll end up six feet below your feet.
Body aches from tensing up,
I don't think I'm alone anymore.
Eyes glancing all around to to be sure,
But I feel like I'm being watched and I don't feel so secure.
I'm trapped here Until Dawn.
Hello Darkness, how have you been?
I am unsure if you met my depression my good old friend.

Woke up with your touch.
Nothing was just good enough.
I'm a go and get buzzed,
Arguments been a bit tough.
I would tell the world, you were already my only girl.
But things come to a end.
I'm a grab a drink and play pretend
Pretend your sincere compliments were enough to keep up the attention.
Good morning and good nights
Have a good day and let's come home to more pointless fights.
The hellos and now good byes.
**** do you think would happen when my happiness became a priority.
Sorry my emotions had seniority.
I'm a get better now without your smile to picture.
I Frame up my flaws to move forward with out looking back.
This is the new chapter of a new act.
You called them **** ups, I've made room for improvements.
**** the love I've once brought, then we make up and still fought.
What did I do I already forgot.
How and I to reach the top.
You've been my anchored, but the homies supported me with a life jacket.
Sorry drownings for the weak and I know you can't hack it.

Take a moment to breathe
Breathing is free go at your own pace
Tell anxiety this is my space
Conquer the moment
Remember your hustle like you own it
The world isn't watching
Just the haters
They jealous of your success
They only know flaws
Allow yourself to reset
It's okay to fail and restart
Take that rep
Take a breath
Repeat the cycle again
🧡

She brings a mans hope
She's perfect in every way
But the man is shot down
she lost interest before a chance was even given