As I attempt to move forward,
I catch myself going the wrong direction.
The temptations in my head lead me to self conversations,
but I hold back do to self motivations.

**** a temptation when I have myself.
I will throw success at my mental health.
Some have lost their lives,
Maybe they'll find themselves on the other side.

I avoid myself because I scare myself when I careless,
I've always wanted to avoid my regrets.
It got tougher when everyone I loved left.

Always needed that company
Never wanted anyone to speak
Just sit in the room silent with me
The comfort of a silent conversation dulled a loud discomfort
Just sit close with some comfort

This work place put me through the ringer
A busy bee avoiding the stinger
Not a better place for a bee
I've been put to work for my honey
Beautiful flowers to bloom
Plenty of pollination in this room
Orders from the Queen
21 day cycle and I'll go on repeat
That's the way it's supposed to bee
Working for my Queen
Lavender to coat my scent
A sunflower to watch open
I'm plenty of busy
I'll fly around 20 miles a hour to collect goods from a rosemary
The beauty of a drone, a true natural nature grown
Worker bees protecting a Queens home

Her smile is like Autumn, I fall for it everytime. Like the leaves, I've raked up some colors pure as gold. Let's bag our love for one another, live together and watch each other get old. I'd take her out for some coffee, she'll talk about her day :)
Her eyes kept me awake
Better for me to wish upon a star with her gaze
I can fall for her all day
Her love would be my field trip, but a adventure on repeat

I've shared your love
I've shared it everytime I felt hollow
With the way my lips were touched it'd be impossible to swallow
But then a bottle of emotions drowned with my thoughts
The way it's all empty, the way the sudden goodbyes made me feel so numb
I lie there pretending to be okay as these sleeping pills make me feel so awake
Maybe another pill might take the edge off.
I look at her eyes as if they saw my prescription
Diagnosed love failure, happens more than once a day
Then I've realized I've overdosed off of her smiles and touch
I'd a gave my life to those bottles
A sip of desire, one shot of pleasure.
But a dose of our toxic habits and goodbyes.
Sorry love, you don't get to worry about my addictions anymore.
I ruined it....remember?

I'll be your superman, your shattered heart will be my kryptonite.
I'll hug you so tight. But as long as you fall I'll take you out so we're in flight. Depression and pain is something we'll always fight.
Remember when we used to talk through dawn? The times we called our home phone, or the endless skating sessions and the top of Pinehurst was our throne?
Well it still is, we're just cloquet kids. For you I'd never put away my cape! But in the end it'd be you who saved the day. You've got the sweetest heart, I swear it was a cavity. But with you I'll always be happy. Darling you were my shooting star and you're now a granted wish.