can i stop giving
your words meaning
those that are
but a slip of the tongue
god
it ******* angers me
how much
i think of you

n.b.

you are like an addiction
that i cannot beat
an affliction
at the core
when i speak
and think
of you
like a need
winning every time
and i lie
to those around
me

and take another hit
of you

n.b.

A Blasphemous insult
to road rages
gutted pigs
and pixie tricks lying
on the headboard
over my too-small bed.

i am malicious
in the way that i am so far
but so very
in
and out
of my head.

dangerous foreplay
numbing cigarette snubs of kitten licks
i pull and tug
at the cancerous death
of Life.

wicked ends of
nights begins
and your lips all over mine.
on repeat.
like a broken cassette until i lay
vomiting over
this projectile mess.

and i search for
words that could
would
describe this
. . .
lingo of broken down
younglings
who for god sings,
and screams,
and do not know.

God, they do not know.

they who have screamed,
for Adam and Eve
and lay wrapped in each others tongues.
noses bleeding,
never-ending
eyes perceiving
what we all have been needing
darkness.

its shrieking
shivering
cries of madness toppled onto
eyes
you have been searching for your whole
Life.

and the mind-numbing
drugs
that you inflict upon yourself
digging your fingers into your skin
searching for flesh
and possibly a soul within.

we are the knocked out
lie living
generation of drunks

losing ourselves
in what we call
love.


n.b.

ive been two
ten - a billion people
and tonight i found out
i like guys

n.b.

feeling like i need to slit my wrists and just die
this loneliness is killing me
i just might
take the knife to my chest
rip my insides open and press
at my beating heart
yet im still depressed
thinking of her

and the sound of nothingness
is soothing
yet i need someone here with me

n.b

I think Jealousy is a shameful feeling

A sacred pact made with
an unknown demon

A bitter resentment of a past
complication

A mirrored messiah judging
all your thinking

Tuberculosis fit in the modern human

mind

and body stained with a dark
religion

Jealousy is a monsters making

Yet, perhaps,
the most Human of feelings

n.b.

Autumn colored leaves
The soft humming
of the busy streets.
The blooming wind
in its cold daze
making its way throughout your hair

“Wow,”

My voice breaks
this scenic scene
forever grateful,
that you are here with me.

And though,
you turn your head
ever-so-slightly
your eyes pierce
my whole being.

And then you look back
down at the ground,
the trees,
anywhere but me
until the day seizes to be.

n.b.