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Mystery Girl Aug 2016
Bottle after bottle
Pulling me in
I'm drowning in the buzz
My life jacket in this misery
The only thing keeping me afloat
Under the crushing weight
Of my uselessness
Mystery Girl Aug 2016
It always starts with just a sip
Maybe a shot
Then the games begin
And I want it
The burning in my throat
The room keeps spinning
Round and round
I keep downing more and more
Prolonging the buzz
Until it's more than just a tingle
Mystery Girl Jun 2016
It's not a competition
This idea you argue,
That someone has to have it worse,
Is only doing damage
To already broken people
There's no need for comparison
We all have problems
I trusted you with my secret
So that we could help each other,
Because what are we here for
If not one another,
It wasn't for you to judge me
Or tell me that your problems are worse
I didn't tell you
So you could make me feel bad
I came to you
In the confidence of friendship
Because I thought that you,
Of all people, would understand
Since you're dealing with your own issues
And I wouldn't feel so alone
I never realized I could be wrong
In thinking you had my back
But I surely won't make that mistake again
Why do you do this?
IT HAS TO STOP
We can't bully each other
About these illnesses
Fighting accomplishes nothing
And I will be the first to admit
That I need to work on who I am
But we all do
In our own different ways
Because the situations are not equal
Don't pretend that they are
My situation affects me
And yours affects you
Differently
It may seem like nothing to you
But it's breaking me down inside
Destroying my world
Swallowing me whole
And because of you
Because you would rather hurt me
Than help me
I only have two options
I can either figure it out on my own,
It wouldn't be the first time,
Or I can let it make me sick
So sick that I "look the part"
So no one can deny it anymore
But by then it will be too late
And I will only be an example
Of how no one cares
Until it's too late to help
So let's be a better example
For those of us to come
Mystery Girl May 2016
I'M NOT OKAY
And I am so sick of pretending
That everything is fine
There is something wrong
I can feel it
I just don't know what it is yet
Mystery Girl Mar 2016
You ease my fears
Calm my worries
With your soft voice
Gentle touch
Tender kisses
You soothe my soul
Mystery Girl Mar 2016
With paint covered fingers
The sky paints the sunset
Breathtakingly beautiful
Warming the souls
Of all who see it
Mystery Girl Mar 2016
Feeling the warmth of the sun
Shining down on my face
The cool breeze blowing in my hair
Petrichor and the rain
Washing through me
The taste of freshly made desserts
Painting my taste buds with joy
Watercolors and acrylics
Paintings that turned out decent
Sketches not half bad
Small smiles on my face
Happy memories popping up
These things give me hope
That there is more
More than this numbness
I've grown so used to
They give me hope that one day
I won't have to hurt anymore
Hope that I can be free
To trust and love
Hope that I can live again
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