Terrified
That i will be like this
Forever
I don't want this to be real
At the same time
I love this
I like the feeling of numbness
Countless of other things
That make up anorexia
I just want to be fragile
Like a baby
I want to be baby

No one should ever
Want this demon
To take over them
It's evil
Takes over
Your entire being
Something that
I wish i knew
Thin doesn't equal happiness
Control doesn't give you power
It makes you miserable
In every sense of the word
All it does
Is have
A deadly obsession
With the scale
That never changes
Nothing ever satisfies
Your starving soul

Someone hold me
Someone to carry me
Someone to tell me
You love me
Just tell me
You love me

There's a fleeting moment
When i feel beautiful
Like i can do anything
Everything
95% of the time
I feel like an elephant
In the circus
Getting picked on
Fold what to do
All day
Every day
I'm as fat
As an elephant
Who would be lucky
To be beautiful

All i want to do
Is to eat
Like a normal human
I don't understand
Why they chose me
To get trapped
By this evil
Blood *******
Weight obsessed
Demon
In my head

Criticizing bodies
Every where i turn
Feel like a judgmental fool
This disorder
Has changed the way
I perceive other humans
I'm embarrassed
I care so much
I realize
I'm a abnormal creature
Why do i care so much?
I don't understand
Why the devil choose
To ruin my body and soul

My mind
Is a confusing place
My parents
Think i'm crazy
I don't know
What to say
I'm not normal
I'm not myself
I'm a shell of a girl
Who wants to be thin
How hard is that to understand?