Legs cramping
Heart burning
Tears bounce off your cheek
I don't want to do this anymore
But at the same time
I want to feel my bones
My ribs protruding
Through my translucent skin
I want both
The sad reality is
I can't have both
Pulling between two continents
The continent of life and death
I spent too long
In the death continent
Of the world
The continent of life
Is calling my name
Can my feet let me
Travel that far?
Life is waiting for me
To seek my potential
In a non-destructive world

I feel like i'm living a lie
Dajavue
Go to school
Come home
Say what i'm supposed to say
Do what's right

At 15 this isn't
What i pictured for myself
Broken and manic
In every which way
This isn't what i wanted
I'm done
Lost forever

I'm a shameful secret
That you try with every ounce of your strength
To hide from the world
No sound
No breath
Invisible
Dead to the world
No point in hiding the facts
Despicable human being
I'm sorry
I don't know what to say

Happy mothers day
I know you will always stay
You've been there with me
Through everything
I couldn't be more grateful
Even when i am sometimes hateful
You have taught me so much
You are the rock
You are a hard worker
A great mother
I love you
Happy mother's day

I never want you to feel
Like i don't love
And care for you
I love you
And want you all to know
This isn't me
A demon has taken me away
And refuses to set me free
I'm sorry
I might not physically show it
But i love you with all my heart

All i want
Is to eat
Like any regular human would
I want to exercise for fun
Not to burn calories
ED controls me now
I can't retriete out of my mind
For any length of time
It always comes back
In a force that
Is too strong to bare