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327 · Oct 2016
Rose
Hidden behind the vast varieties of
wonderful flowers ,
All a different breed ,
All a different colour ,
Non alike.
She sat quietly in the over growing crowed,
Happy to be as she was.  
Maybe it was luck ,
Maybe it was a coincidence,
Maybe it was destiny,
But
I found her ,
She was more bewitching than any other I can and will come across,  
Her beauty captured more than my eyes ,
She captured my being,
She captured my soul,
She was a rose
Unlike any in existence,
But
Her worth
Her beauty
Her being
Unappreciated by passers.
One can only give into her charms
One can only break to her soft whispers,
She was a rose blossoming
More and more every day,
Growing more pulchritudinous.
326 · Nov 2015
you can call me
I never wanted a movie scene
Or song lyrical
Love.
I never wanted you to be
My damsel in distress.
I never wanted you to be perfect.
All I ever wanted was for you to be mine
Errors and defects.
I never wanted to get hurt
I never wanted you to get hurt.
But
You can call me yours if you say im with you.
You can fix whats broken all you need to do is say I love you.
You can call me yours if you just come right back too.
I never wanted to see us end and when we did I fell apart
When we did I lost half a heart.
You can call me yours if you just hold on.
Hold on to what we once owned.
You can call me yours if you just ...
Just say I love you.
323 · May 2016
Last dance.
Step by step ,
Her arms inntwined with mine
A moment stuck in time
Round and round we go with the hope of never letting go.
One more step closer to the end
One more beat closer to the end.
I look deep within her eyes and I see her looking into my soul ,her sympathy shows she sees my woes.
She holds me close
She kills the cold
And round and round we go.
Her grip loosens
She lets go.
Round and round I go all alone
Left to forever hold on to our last dance.
Voices
Voices all around me
Screaming your name
Screaming my pain
Voices telling me our denied love story
The voices are all over me
They are a gift of my insanity
I should fear them
I should run from them
But they welcome me
They fill my void
They fill the empty space you once took up.
The voices speak of our love
The voices cry over our love
The voices fade
Slowly into the dark abyss,
As I fade into my dreams
And before I sink into the kaleidoscope of colors that flood my cerebral cortex
The voices screetch
''YOU LOVED HER YESTERDAY , YOU LOVED HER TODAY , YOU WILL LOVE HER TOMORROW !".
The kaleidoscope of colors take over and into a world of blur and haze I disapear in search of my sanity , in search of you.
323 · Apr 2016
Why?.
Cruel , you ripped us from paradise.
You were supposed to nurture us,
You were supposed to love and protect us.
Why?.
We fell in your arms,
We gave our hearts and we followed you.
Why?.
You have forsaken us,
Why?.
You have allowed our innocent to be corrupted.
You have thrown objects toward us,
You have dug hole's for us to fall in,
Why?.
Why life , why have you done this.
I broke but I stood again.
Help the others who broke but are still broken.
Why?.
Why do you not speak ?,
Why do you still ask for our defeat ?.
You call us your children but a mother never harms her children,
You tell us we must grow but you push the innocent  toward the darkness of this world.
Why?.
Why?
WHY!?.
Are you not like me sick to the core of whatever soul is left of watching people break and fall towards the darkness.
Are you not sick of the wicked ?.
Why?.
Do I fight alone ?
Do I stand alone ?
Why do you not empower me ?
Why do you not support me in saving the broken ?
Why do you not give me the power to cure the wicked in the innocent ?.
You taught me in the midst of darkness I must be the light but you try to dim that which shines bright ?.
Has the millions of years since he created you corrupted your purpose ?
Has the wickedness of the innocent consumed you ?
Why life have you created a barren waste land for us to squander like rodents while the wickedness of the innocent prevail ?
Yet again you are silent.
But I shall burn bright. The last torch to guide human life and save that which has not yet died. I shall break the wicked of the innocent.
315 · Dec 2015
Appreciation
Someone to want my love
Someone to need me
Someone to be
Someone to appreciate me
Thats all I ever needed
No money
No fame or fortune
No adventure
Just someone.
Never have I felt the feeling of being wanted , needed or loved.
So to myself I ask
So to the public I scream
What is the point ?
The point of calling you mine?
The point of me being yours ?
The point of our relationship?
The point of an us?
If im not needed
If im not wanted
So to the point I conclude
There is no point
Guess thats why its called appreciation.
314 · Sep 2014
Confusion
is this love worth it ,
is it worth the effort will it last or will it end
the same way the others did
, so much confusion so much doubt
so much love yet so little trust ,
is this the meaning of love to be
hurt and to love again with the fear of being hurt again
what is this
why is it so hard to know whether she loves truly or whether she
loves falsely
whether her love is honest and real or another game
im yet to play.
When we love the sky is more blue than usual,
When we love the sun shines more bright than normal.
When we love the dark sadness decays .
We voyage into uncharted territory, sailing seas both calm and chaotic, pulling day and night to better our voyage to feel the pleasant joy of happiness love gives.
But when we lose...
When we lose our love ,
The voyage to paradise turns into a nightmare of shipwreck,  
We find ourselves shipwrecked on an island of solitude,
left to lick the wounds of our broken ship where we made so many happy memories.
The previous blue skies
Are now no more than
a grey empty abyss ,
and we find ourselves alone left to wonder where it all went wrong.
You suddenly realise that forever was only as long as unearned happiness provided shelter from the world.
Now reality is all that's left of a broken heart and tainted soul.
314 · Dec 2015
Hearts aloud
Like a light you gave me guidance.
I question my decision-
Was I wrong to fall for you ?
is my heart wrong for calling to you?
But like a test I cannot change the answers ,nor can I change the outcome.
Am I ruining a friendship
Or
Am I opening a relationship
Either choice that comes I hope neither takes you away from me my love.
For after more time then I care to count
My silent heart has found its sound.
My silent words choose to speak aloud but my fear still remains safe and sound.
307 · Dec 2014
Castle with broken wall
Everyday I wake up to the cold feeling of a cloudy sky , its been like this since you left, I dread the feeling of my feet reaching for the cold floor , there's no warmth , no light ,this place is nothing but an empty box filled with memories of you and I , every tear that drops is a crack in my heart, all I see is the moment you left , the pain in your eyes and the curse of a love so strong but yet so fragile , every moment I spend thinking of you makes me want to run as far away from my own thoughts , but the voice of pain won't let me shut it out. I beg myself not to give up , I make a promise that you'll come back but maybe our love story was a sonnet short and sweet. Maybe our love stories not over , maybe you'll fight for me , but enough maybes , I beg you come back , I plead with you come home , let's fix our castle with broken walls , we never crumble and fall apart , our walls only collapsed. I cannot live without you , I cannot breathe my own air as long as your not around , I fear myself more then I fear what's hidden in the dark, but then again you are my light in the dark.
305 · Dec 2016
My love
My love suffering was all I knew before I met you.
My love I thought my fate was sealed and I let it go, I forgot anything and everything to do with love.
I lived and cared for myself and only myself, I gave up and gave in to the darkest parts of who I was.
What changed ?.
My love I don't even know.
What I do know is that I've found my happiness,  my faith and strength in your smile , I found my missing pieces in your laughter my love.
I found life in you , I saw my future in an instant when our eyes met.
I remember the night we met as clear as I remember my own name ,i remember thinking how gorgeous you were  and how you probably made the stars jealous that night.
There are not enough words or phrases to tell you how much you mean to me or how fast my heart beats when I see you or think of you.
God alone knows when our time is up , all I can pray for is that when my time comes to an end you are by my side so I may see you the way I saw you that first night.
In your own amazing world of glory awaiting to show me a beautiful future and I you.
So to you my love I thank for fixing all my shattered parts and shedding light onto my dark soul may I always be there to burn the light in your path so you'll never feel alone in the dark or ever be cold.
303 · Feb 2016
Tears
Like acid it falls leaving a burning pain
Like a bullet your memories come fast and loud and before you know it you're in pain.
Night after night only the moon knows how you cry.
Wishful you hold on, hoping that through some miracle the pain finds it's exit.
But when it does you're already numb.
All that's left is you staring into an empty space in search of your broken pieces that scattered when you broke before the last tear fell.
Comfort becomes a misplaced item and you can no longer find it.
Happiness like ice became cold and solid
Your heart becomes your antagonist.
And in an instance the pain of nostalgia comes back.
300 · Oct 2014
Tough times
You've been here before, not once, not twice  ,Yes it got harder then it was , yes the load got heavier  And those people who said they'd never leave , just disappeared  But your not weak , you say your not a fool  yet you keep looking back and holding on to those who left , holding on to what was instead of what will be. Life was designed to break you , tough times where designed to teach you , but only you alone can make 'you' ,empires grew and fall , skyscrapers were built and broken down ,so what goes up must come down.It will rain for a month but the sun will always rise  hope is always in reach all you have to do is grab it or die trying, its time to do or die because tough times dont last tough people do so keep the faith and fight on for success.
298 · May 2016
philosophers or poets ?.
Two of a kind yet worlds apart.
We are one yet born apart.
They say poetry is meaning and philosophy is understanding.
Is understanding not the meaning of life ?.
We write poetry with emotion.
We write philosophy with logic.
We are but logically emotional beings.
We are but philosophical poets creating a world of basic understanding of the meaning and questioning of what is life ? , why do we love ?, and what is my purpose ?.
295 · Jul 2015
anticipation.
A white sky haunts me
As the clouds cry a sorrowful
Moment of unkind tears.
Tears that hold a burden for every soul that look's up at the sky and confesses all their sorrows.
I to am one of many who burden the sky ,
With one constant question
"Why?"
"Why not now?"
"Why not soon?"
All the 'why's' but none of the awnsers.
People keep their secrets -
In a box,
In a book,
In a person,
Or
In their hearts,
But I keep my secrets in a place I know is safe, a place no soul will hear it , a place no person will learn it , a place only I hold the key too. A place up in the clouds.
But the biggest secret I hold is the anticipation of waiting for the day I find her along with all my awnsers , the who I question about , the ghost who haunts my dreams the one who will change the world I dreadfully live in.
294 · Sep 2015
How long will I ?
Time no longer has value
It once took hours to do what merely takes seconds
It once stopped for the lovers who first met now let's them walk right past each other.
I can't help ease my heart from the question you fear to ask.
The question your heart holds but eyes ask,
The question I wish I could truly awnser .
"How long will you love me?"
I can't give an exsact date or time if any .
But I know this for as long as there's a beat in my heart I will love you,
As long as there's fish in the water I'll keep coming back to you
As long there's life on this earth I'll protect you
As long as there's life in me I'll always be by you
I can't gurantee any of this but I can promise that for as long as you and I are together I'll always , always love you
294 · Sep 2014
the life of a follower
we build a life holding on to others opinions and ideas of us ,
how they see us and want us to be , what they don't like we change
what they want we keep.

How long are we going to live on their beliefs , their ideas and live the life of another.

what I see is people who live to follow and not to create their own path

the most important thing is when you wake up and look in the mirror who you see is and what you think if them is the most important opinion in life no one elses
291 · Nov 2015
My fair
Broken bones cannot compare
A broken heart seams to no longer care
But still this pain is leaving me in despair
Forever is a long time
But thats how long it seams to have been since the warmth , the light , The joy that is your love has left my life.
Every poem
Every song
Every drawing
Every ounce of creativity I have seams to confess my love for you.
But you still don't show a flare.
What did I do
What did I say
To see you no longer care.
As I stand and try not to care
All I see is a sky of white
Who's drops of rain burn my veins and breaks my might all  because you left me bare.
We , you and me, lived in a daze where we loved and enjoyed the craze maybe it was just a phase but we walked through the haze and everyone stared at the dream we created until it became a nightmare.
To you my fair love I keep my love as I promised you can come in a 50 years and you'll still find me there waiting for this nightmare to end so come soon my fair and  love me with all your care
288 · Nov 2014
I miss you
Days go by but I still stand there slowly walking through the lonely streets of this dead city now that your gone there's no more plan.
I once woke up to sight of you in my arms now I wake up from dreams when there was a time you were in my arms
Your laugh haunts the halls of this.  house where we once shared a love for the ages.
What happened to us I'll never know , where you drifted to I'll never find and why you ran I'll never understand.
I guess all I can say now is
I miss you
I miss you like the waves miss the moon
I miss you like a sun flower misses the sun in the icy depths of winter
I miss you like the lonely sailor misses his home.
I can use all the descriptions in the world but they will all mean the same I miss you.
Everyday I miss you I sink deeper and deeper soon will I reach the sea bed , a place where there's no need for words or explanations.
I dream of the day you come back but then again its just a dream.
Along with you is my light my hope my will and my love for you are my life and I miss you, cause your the one that I want the one that I need the one that I have to have just to succeed , when I saw you that first time I knew it was destiny , I remember when I first held in my arms and I knew it was real now where's all those days gone just disappeared like a dream , every night is a dream and everyday is a nightmare. I need you and I miss you and I love you and I really need to hold because my souls falling apart come back baby let's fix our world and stop this apocalypse and keep our paradise forever.
287 · Jul 2014
Goodbye my love
Sometimes I and think of all the little things we had,  of the time we spent together , the kisses we shared , the memories we made and the love we had. Maybe it was our little dance or short song that had to quickly end , but I know that I practice our moves and listen to us sing over and over just to get some closure on the fact your gone and we're done. Maybe it was my ego maybe it me was taking whatever we had for granted but as they say you only when something is gone will you truly understand its value.
Goodbye my love goodbye our memories always remember I love till the day I die
283 · May 2016
Realisation
We all have that one person who broke us more than we'd admit but sometimes they break us for all the right reasons but in the wrong way.
Our basic human nature is to love and be loved but our basic human defence is to avoid pain.
We fear love in the torment of pain but we embrace it in the gentle calligraphic visualisation that we call love.
We create a contradiction within the balance of our soul causing us to love the hate of love and we create a perfect imbalance within us and our results are no more than complete and utter self destruction.
280 · Jul 2014
Darkness
as I look into the mirror , I see not only my reflection , along with my reflection is my dark side my demon that I will soon loose control of. I'm dying ,my soul is broken along with my heart and the demons patience soon will be paid of when it finally has control. People will soon see the repercussions of their doings to me they will meet the person ive been trying to conceal, the person who follows me in my shadow , the deap dark merciless fool who lives and feasts on the pain of others. I give up on fighting against him , lately it seams his stronger then I am , strong enough to fight the world and dark enough to destroy the people who try to break me.
274 · Dec 2014
Fear.
I love you, but I'm afraid of loving you , I feel like I'm doomed to a history bound to repeat itself , a path of pain I never chose to walk on. You say words but how do I believe you how do I believe what you don't show , how do I know loving you won't be the same as putting a bullet through me. I don't know why but I can't stop loving you , I can't get through my doubt and pain grows like an infection. But sadly all I see is loving you might be the end of me
272 · Dec 2015
Fountain.
One by one they come.
Slowly.
Each with a burden different to the next.
They gather around it
With all their hope in only a few coins.
They throw it with all their hope and they wish for it to come true.
I am too one of the foolish few.
I've prayed,
I've made a deal with the devil,
I've done the unimaginable ,
All for you my love
But now I must do the last of what I can do.
As my hope glides through the air allowing gravity to pull it into liquid despair
I can't help but realise -
Our love was like a coin thrown into a fountain with all hope of a wish coming true.
It was no more than a gambit
A shamble
It was as good as placing a bet on red in roulette
It was a fifty fifty bet
So now I'll leave the fountain to do the rest.
272 · Jan 2016
Same
Like rewind it's back again
Like cancer it never left me.
I thought with you it will be different
but like the others you do the same.
You're here only to break me
Only to hurt me
Take whatevers left and desert me.
But to your loss I have no more for you to break.
If you were death I'd hug you with love for im ready to go.
If you were an enemy ready to **** me I'd hand you the blade.
I have no more
For you to take
I have no more to lose
I have lost the war of love and can no longer be abused.
My heart no more then a pump now and my soul no less than a flickering light.
**** me
Break me
Or
Hurt me
I dont expect anymore than that from you than I have from the others..
270 · Nov 2015
stranger
From the moment you left
Till the moment I broke .
I knew who I was
And
I knew who you were.
Not a day went past
Nor does a day go by
Where you aren't on my mind.
But forgive me my love
Cause I have to speak my mind.
We were perfect strangers
Then we were perfect lovers
And now  ,are no more then perfect  nothing.
The day I lost you I knew who you were
But as today progresses I cant help but forget who you are.
Everyday that passes without you , makes me forget everything about you
Now if I think of you
All that comes to mind is a perfect stranger im glad I didn't meet
But forgive me my love.
Maybe you are praying to god
To make me forget you.
Or maybe my heart is praying to god to help me forget you.
But god almighty knows a love this strong will still play on even when your long gone on and forgotten.
269 · Jun 2015
love again.
Loving again almost seams impossible now.
But yet I still bow down to your feet begging for your mercy
Asking you not to hurt me.
Then I wake up and a feeling of bitter coldness passes through me and I think back to a time when we still tried and then just the thought of love is a painful reminder
Everything that once belonged to me now belongs to another.
266 · Jul 2014
Goodbye
The hardest goodbyes are the ones where we know are needed and the ones we know are real and the last words you'll ever tell that person, we dont want to Say goodbye but we must , we don't know how to tell the person why we are leaving only knowing its for a good cause , but goodbyes are more painful then daggers through the chest coz we know we never gonna see them again and in that moment of departure a tear will fall a tear with words hidden in It words to painful to say and to complicated to understand so we tell them with a tear drop and we walk away with the goodbye of never coming back
266 · Jul 2014
To you my love
There are things in this world we will never understand , love , hatred and jealousy is a few examples of those things. I don't understand something and thats why I love you half as much as I do , even though we are apart when I close my eyes and put my hand out it feels as if your holding it. In this crazy world we learn to build up walls some people break it, some never build it and others never let anyone in , you were never ment to come behind my wall but you did and how I have no clue, but since you're here you've become my life. Forgive me my weakness but I cant see you go I wont see you walk away , I'll fight and fight till my last and even when im gone ill still come back and I'll keep coming back till we spend forever together, this heart beats for one and thats you , your my life support my reason to wake up in the morning, when I feel like giving up I close my eyes and think of you and I keep going for you.
264 · Jul 2014
Give up
This relationship is like a walk in a desert , feels like I've been walking forever,
feels like the sun got me down
feels like you the hot  unkind sand enjoys my pain
feels like all I am is another just passing by
feels like all you want is to drag me down and watch me lay for waste as I decay and slowly suffer a painful death, but the shame is on me for loving you and not being able to let go guess I love the pain and I guess I give up
263 · Jun 2015
This night.
Hold onto me through the night,
So that I may feel your heart beat with mine,
So that I feel the warmth of your arms once more ,
So that I may see the light of dawn once more,
For when dawn breaks so will this hold we've shared through the night.
I shall have to leave once more just as the night
And
What was merely hours of holding you through the night felt like years - 10 or 20 I seam to have lost track of time but
I will forever cherish these moments we've shared through this night and this night : this night will forever be not the worlds night but forever more so our night.
263 · Sep 2015
prayer
God help me
i cant breathe
i cant feel
she has taken over me
she has ruined me
she has broken me
every minute of everyday since the day she left i've lived in hell
since the day she left i've lost all hope
god help me
i miss her so much
i cannot love another
god help me
this pain is killing me inside
take this pain away i beg for your mercy please take this pain away or take me
this life you've gifted me is falling apart
god please help me
its killing me
i can no longer numb this pain inside
god please help me
i've begun to dig my own grave because she's killing me
this love i have for her is killing me
god please help me
Yes i miss her unconditionally , yes i wish she was here with me  
but oh lord im dying theres no more tears left to cry
theres no more rope left to climb
god please i beg you please god help me take away this pain take me lord its killing me
262 · Dec 2015
Love
A fire that burns
A flame that stays calm within our hearts-
Then we meet them
The gasoline to our flame
The oxygen to our flame
The life of our flame.
The simple wait for it
The smart look for it
The brave fight for it
But
The hurt hide from it.
Because
A flame will always do what its made to do
A flame will always burn
I've lost my flame
Many have but someday the sun will rise again until then the dark shall settle and night will be my light in hope of a moon to give some light and maybs some day the sun will rise and the flame the love will live again.
262 · Oct 2015
Us
Us
Maybe there was an us to fight for
But all I know is that-
You gave up the battle before the war.
So now live the life you saw without me
And pray
Its better then the life you saw with me.
Cause now as I move on you'll realise what's truly gone and that's when you'll truly be torn.
but
thank you cause as they say
your darkest hour will come before your dawn.
258 · Aug 2015
sick of you.
I'm tired of this monotonous ritual I've been performing.
I'm tired of this cold feeling I've been holding.
I'm tired of missing you.
People say time heals , its been so long and this pain , this lonely pain of you being gone for so long has eaten every part of my hope , its become my cancer , you've become my cancer.
Just as the lyrics from music runs through our minds so does all your truthful lies.
And like a beacon one part of our love stands out the part with all your promises full of lies.
I can't pretend I'm okay any longer
I can't pretend I'm not sick
Because I'm sick , I'm sick of you , I'm sick of missing you , I'm sick of silently screaming for you to come back , I'm sick of not wanting to love anyone else.
The day you left was the day I died , the day you left was the day the world lost me. The day I become sick the day love , hope , faith and trust all broke like the ties and bridges we made together.
254 · Dec 2015
How
How
Like a shooting star
You came in the blink of an eye
Made me wish
Made me hope
then disappeared leaving me with no more then a wish.
How ?
How do I let go of you?
How do I say goodbye
To all the memories , the love , ?
How do I say goodbye and let go of us ?
Like a bird I'll lose my wings
Like a fish I'll swallow water
Like glass I'll shatter.
No one's going to love you like I do
No one's going to hold you like I did.
But no one's going to put me through what you did...
As painful as it tasted I loved the pain
As cold as it is I love the frost bite
As broken as I am I love putting myself together
But a piece of me will always be with you
Like a pendent keep it safe and wear it on your chest for every heartbeat you have I'll feel it on my half for the signal shall never be low.
253 · May 2016
philosophers or poets ?.
Two of a kind yet worlds apart.
We are one yet born apart.
They say poetry is meaning and philosophy is understanding.
Is understanding not the meaning of life ?.
We write poetry with emotion.
We write philosophy with logic.
We are but logically emotional beings.
We are but philosophical poets creating a world of basic understanding of the meaning and questioning of what is life ? , why do we love ?, and what is my purpose ?.
248 · Aug 2014
My weakness
Baby in this evil world the people are merciless and cruel they'll feed on your pain and enjoy it and will keep coming back for more even when you have nothing left to give they'll still come.
Because of that I had to become hard and harsh I had to pull myself together and seal my heart , and then I feared no one , and I was an unstoppable force
then you came and now your my only weakness , your the one thing they can hurt to get to me but if they touch you ,
that will be the last they see of anything because even though you are my weakness your love is my strength , my shield and you are the one person I cant live without , loosing you is the one thing I fear and a future with you is the only reason I fight.
244 · Dec 2015
LIE
LIE
I was broken,
Torn apart ,
Left for dead ,
Lived in the dark.
Then you came
You were all I could ask for
Everything and more.
Like the scars that covers my arm
You covered my heart.
But like the darkness I lived in you promised no more than bitter emptiness.
As the slow tears of the sky shower us,
I can't help but contribute to the waterfall of tears.
No matter how hard I cry
Or
scream into the night ,
I can never change the fact
our love was no more than a beautiful lie.
Into the darkness I hide
Holding onto no more than the fading light of our lie.
Maybe you'll come back
Maybe my demons will consume me.
But I loved our lie
I loved you
Even if it all was a lie.
244 · Jun 2015
promises
Our promises were like glass
  So fragile that the slightest touch would break them.
I over looked all the signs of betrayel and held on to the foolish hope that was soon to set sail with you.
You lied and told me the four letter word we both used one to many times.
     At the height of all the lies
    You told me you'd choose me over any and everything grabbed my hand and said we'd fight odds.        and ends to be togther, but when it came down to it you choose the odds over me and we came to the end and all our promises broke like the fragile heart you once clothed with your warm love and affection.
240 · Nov 2015
Young fool
Years ago
When life still held on to what now is memories
I remember I saw you -
Saw you in my dreams.
Oh young fool why
Why did you fall for her from then.
Young fool why did you love a dream that was meant to ****.
Young fool why did you dream.
Oh young fool.
But to you
To you my beautiful I confess,
Not a day since I lost you
Have I not thought about you
And
Its kind of beautiful
Its kind of thoughtful
Its kind of sorrowful
Its a kind of fools
A young fools naive nature
Oh my beautiful I love you
I've loved you from the day a young fool dreamed a dream into reality
239 · Aug 2015
a shameful love.
Looking back at what we had
I close my eyes and look away,
I look away from the memories we made,
I look away from the pain you made.
And then I start to remember when we spoke for hours into the morning light.
When you cried and I broke.
I remember it all.
But I'm ashamed to remember our love , cause I'm just one on the list , not a special one or a meaningful one just another one on the list.
And the pain comes back reminding me after you left you watched me fall apart and did nothing to help , but then again how can you help something you caused.
After everything we've been through I'm ashamed to say I was a fool to love you.
Cause in the end I broke apart falling to pieces hitting the ground and you walked away yet when you fell apart I picked you up , I stood above you when it rained on you, I held you when the world got cold, I I carried you when you gave up hope, I brought the light when darkness to over your might , I'm most ashamed to say I gave you all the love I had and more and you took me for all I got and ran along.
238 · Aug 2014
The end
Dont know why I can see it but I do ,
I see it coming from miles and miles away
I know this is the part where the end starts,
I know it I feel it I see it and my heats crying it , its cracking with every day that passes by its breaking knowing that our world will soon meet its end and you'll be gone.
The nights seam colder and more lonely , the days seams sadder and grey but I guess its because I know your love my warmth will soon be gone , when the day comes I'll let you go not because I don't love you but because I do , I'll live ive always lived but my existence is equal death , all I can do now is enjoy the time I have left with you because you love him he was your mistake but now you realise im the mistake. and you miss him and all I can say is go to him.
235 · Jul 2014
My home
We all give up hope and think that fairy tale love only exists in the movies but this time round its different I didn't just find that fairy tale love I found that love that we see in our grand parents when they are 80 years old and still look at each other like they did that first day I know I am not the best looking guy I don't have great skin I have pimples I don't have a perfect body but I have what other guys don't I have the heart to deal with pain n betrayal and still be faithful to one girl I know who I am now because of you and I know whatever I am going to do n become is because of us. No matter what happens I'll always look at u like I did the first time and I will always hold you where I promised and that is the right side of my chest and the reason im alive everyday that's your home and no one can take your place
231 · Nov 2014
The true monsters
I followed the path of light I went straight through hell and watched the demons rip off my flesh and drain my blood ,I dug up back to earth only to swim in a pool of blood shed by the greedy merciless hungry politicians , children lay dead, bodies soulless and eyes filled with more pain then a bullet in a gun , when I awoke to this when I saw this I missed hell for there even there in the fiery pit of hell there's mercy to the wicked of wicked to the sinners of sinners but here on earth men are worst then the devil himself , even he fears what man has become, we fear monsters under our beds and in the dark , but the truth is we fear the monsters in the mirror for that reflection the true monsters monsters are showen
220 · Sep 2014
the life of a follower
we build a life holding on to others opinions and ideas of us ,
how they see us and want us to be , what they don't like we change
what they want we keep.

How long are we going to live on their beliefs , their ideas and live the life of another.

what I see is people who live to follow and not to create their own path

the most important thing is when you wake up and look in the mirror who you see is and what you think if them is the most important opinion in life no one elses
219 · Sep 2015
remembering to forget you
how long will this pain last
how long will my slain heart cry?
They all tell me to forget you
like i have'nt been trying
they all say move on
but how do i with only half a heart left to love
they say so much
so much for their futile ideas
ideas i've tried
ideas that have made me cry
in the end all i an do is lie
just lie to them all to satisfy their hopeless hope with a sense of help
i dont know where you are or where to start but i cant forget you or our love
i cant forget anything.
Least of all you
but then again how do i forget you while remembering to forget you.
216 · Jul 2014
you
you
As I look up at the moon tonight I just cant but help myself and think of you , times have been tough the roads been bumpy and I lost my love , I once thought I loved someone else but the thing that kept my heart true to you was the three words 8 letters n u can say it in over 40 languages but in our case I say it once and it has more meaning to you then it will ever have on anyone else. You're my guiding light , my guardian angel your not just my companion  your my best friend my everything and you make a world worth living so no matter how many times I. Say it , 1 time 7 times 99 times it doesn't matter because its just words but when you hold me close , or close your eyes and think of me I know it will have more effect because my love for you isn't in the world its in my heart and my soul which ive given up to you along time ago so to you I say I love you
214 · Jul 2016
Self destruction
Is it funny that till today I can't love another ?.
My silence holds me prisoner in my own asylum of solitude ,
while I torture myself ,
while:
I break my bones ,
I break my spirit ,
I break my soul,
by looking back at our memories trying to make myself whole.
Your voice echoes across my mind destroying my ear drums, I shut my eyes in pain and the only relief is the very thing that tortures me.
You fix me and you break me.
You love me and you hate me.
You forget me and you remember me.
All I can chant in this fortress of self destruction is,
"My love for you was always eternal ,
But
My destruction is internal!."
All this pain and this torture and I still say "I love you" ,
And I still ask do you not love me too?.
205 · Jul 2014
waiting
Why am I waiting for you ?
why am I waiting for you to see my love?
why am I waiting and suffering ?, why do I sit and allow tears holding a thousands words fall in vein ?, why cant you love me the way I love you? , why is it you and those before you found joy im my pain? , is this some game ?, am I the joker of the castle? , is my duty to entertain you and be thrown aside?, why am I waiting for you? , why cant I just let you go and tell you leave?, why are you my weakness? ,why is there no answers to all my questions just empty cold darkness
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