I think I might
secretly love attention
But have no idea
how to accept it

The night's cold wind
blows gently across my face
carefully pushing my hair into vision
With an assertive finger
I put it back in place
out of the way

and question
what I did
to deserve this

Clear Ice Shard
marked with the blood of woe
Sins have been conducted
and are visible in the snow

Trail on the path
footsteps in the snow covered mud
A body is being dragged
and follows tracks of blood

Into the frozen forest
and far out of sight
Further the capter drags you
in the darkest of night

Past the rugged shrubs
and on beyond the snowy rocks
Besides a smoking campfire
does he the body drops

Ponder and wonder
to what will now follow
Bring he forth a trunk
contents which are hollow

And in this cold night
motionless the body cannot speak
But frighten the capter
as he hears a vile screech

As the crows surround
gazing upon the ****** pile
Attracted they are
to a stench so vile

Words muttered
and a blunt knife
Searing through a body
that recently contained life

In the cold night
his catch no longer warm
Torn and shredded into pieces
As winds turn to storm

Nails black and red
blood soaked skin
A unshaven beard
and the smell of gin

Bones fill the ground
and mark the den of the beast
As another is consumed
and you have become part of the cannibals feast

beating
yet broken
can't find my voice

numbness leaks
from her lacking presence
filling me, eroding my core
overflowing with inaction

unable to breath
drowning in teardrops
and buried in mountains of memories

Struggling to get up
out of that caring bed which I lie
Pulling on some clothes
while wiping the sleep from my eye

Such a horrible morning
have to admit I feel like ****
Can't make the slightest conversation
unable to eat the slightest bit

And of course today had to be the day
in which my luck turned around
Waiting for the elevator
on the level ground

As a beautiful girl stands beside me
who I had never met before
Seems that we were both
heading to the third floor

And as we went up
I honestly couldn't find anything to say
The lift raised in silence
I just didn't have the energy today

If only I had slept earlier
then perhaps the moment could have been saved
I will remember this always
and never ever again forget to shave

The orange leaves
fall again
Showing to all
that yet another has come to end

Landing in the pond below
only to float away
Experiences and past shades
no longer that color today

Shoved along
with a winded blast
Never expecting such warmth
to long last

Light fading behind horizon
day coming to end
Disjointed from tree t'last
no longer can pretend

But one thing lay
beyond the corner
Although distant from 't
can no longer harm her

To lay still
a decomposing corpse
Living on to fade away
a life of such remorse

As to dust it crumples
no longer tree view
Silently alone
as fresh leaves grow anew

Fight for your life
Tear down your walls
Walk all over your problems
As every crumbling brick falls
Contending every insecurity
The endless battle mauls
Each day it continues
The same tiring brawls
Battered and beaten
Everyone covered in sores
Hurt and defeated
Dropping down on all fours
Laying motionless; defeated
While your insecurities still crawls

Within the starlight gaze
grow shrooms below
lightly decorating
the silent grove
filling a place of beauty
with a touch of mystery
and gently covering the dirt

Young hearts
mold together under mistle arc
The beginning is always perfect
initial love always feels stark

As time progresses
and they lay in park
Just like the dogs around
they too begin to bark

To each other become weary
no longer holding that precious spark
They grow tired of each others company
and push their love into the dark

Two of a pair
Always seen side by side
Even in rough times
The other was always along for the ride

But as time passed
And things became rotten
Those close little memories
Like each other were forgotten

And it wasn't long
before each other they couldn't stand
Another awkward encounter
He wasn't even willing to take my hand

And now my old brother
Watch as I slam your face into the mud
You can't get out of this, *******
it was written in blood

Tears and ashes
just another life sold
Suffer shall the innocent
left out in the cold
Shift the blame on me
public's mind they shall mold
How dare you judge me
when your hands are covered in gold

A hooded figure
walks the night
Walking in shadows
keeping out of sight

The road he travels
walked on by all
Heartbreak and tragedy
not hearing mercy's call

The darkness he walks in
hides but his face
Not the tears or thoughts
or the memories he tries to erase

Blankets of shadow
cover arms crying with the mark
But everything is okay
as long as he remains in the dark

**** with me baby
Let's play your twisted little games
And watch us fall to the floor
Let's erase everything
Destroy my world
and I will gladly destroy yours too
I hope you're ready love
because it's time to burn

Angel with broken wings
i beg you be brave
For as useless as I am
help you i shall save

For you see not of such beauty
and hate who you are
Try convince you otherwise
but all that is returned are scar

That perfect hair
and those beautiful eyes
Self inflicted wounds
and filled with manifesting lies

Don't listen to them
just try find yourself
You are more than them
more than just another book on the shelf

And I don't care how long it takes
till this for you I prove
I shall you protect
and your wounds try soothe

Maybe I can't help
but then I will die trying
Because I cannot just sit around
when an angel is crying

Self indulged in rage-infested thought
Remain I my last resort
Dreams of cheer and plans we lay
Foolishly thinking we would come to that day

For then we thought we would ever last
Not to shatter to pieces in'a sudden blast
Talking on how we would name our children
Deep inside I feel as if I hav't **** them

Left alone in a sleepless night
Nothing but guilt, spil't left and right
For one who had such a clear conscience
To a mind of pain and other worthless nonsense

Dare I wish I you never met
Or hope you find a cruel death
For my mind has no place to lie
Filled with graves of the dreams you let die

"Just kidding"
a simple harmful joke being said.
Not seeing what follows
with the child crying under their bed

An insult
followed by a punch thrown
Those bruises are nothing
compared to when he gets home

Unincluded and unwanted
love left amissed
Better ways to deal with the pain
now holding scars on his wrists

Relations destroyed
life in complete dismay
A blood pile covers the floor
beside a suicide letter lay

A cold winters day
staring thoughtlessly out of a clear window
watching as the rain drops carelessly
onto the soaked brickwork below
without a single thought
I close my eyes
for no particular reason
and listen to the rain
hearing the drops
feeling them as if they landed on my bare skin
the cold freezing all doubt within me
and leaving me desolate
but not unhappy

accepting
that like the rain
everything
is cold
but in its own way
beautiful

Crystal drops
and unified faith
Heated motions frozen
at the hand of love's wraith

Cry out your eyes
Scream all you can
Get lost in another world
far from reality you ran

Rip open your sleeves
Question whether you are sane
We all need our own way
to deal with the pain

A blissful aroma
in a field of gray
Scattered ashes beside
a path battered with dismay

Many are brought
but few return
Their stories are taught
while few do learn

Within the jungle
lay many a beast
Which only to a larger
are found a feast

For our confidence
betrays us, leads us astray
We can't see the knife behind us
while forcing a smile onto display

In the attempts of others lessen
with self-thought cunning reave
Find ourselves caught
in the webs we ourselves had weave

Comparing towers of coin
while'st flinging the blame
As we are drowning in holy water
and others are shining within flame

no
how can you leave now
after swaying my heart
eroding my doubts
and filling those holes
with seeds of dreams
for our future

Look down on me
Point, laugh or stare
Just because of the way I dress
or the length of my hair

Why don't you just make a joke
See if I ******* care
I'll beat the **** out of you
say it to my face if you dare

These scars contain meaning
not because of trash like you
Mention them one more time
and I'll give you a few

I think it's time you back up
and back in your seat you sit
For I may not be the strongest
but I won't take nobodies ****

And I swear if you push me
that you will regret
I'll have you begging for your life
before I even begin to sweat

Contest and you'll see
I'll put the trash in the bin
I may be a loser
but in this I will win

Caught in the blaze
Burning in the apocalyptic fire
Scorching in the moment
Words escape me
And turn to ethers
Burning before they were born
The pit of my stomach
Encages the answer I seek
But those winged faeries
Stand with me but dont speak
Held back by fear
Trapped behind trembling lips
And unnecessary doubt
Burning me
but not letting the warmth in

Misery
dressed up in her favorite shade
Curled to perfection
and drowning within raw unexposed beauty

How my mind loves to surprise me
Ripping away at my hopes, while
flirting with happiness
and ticking away at my sanity

Madness?
To which do you address?
Countless blessings lay unwanted
Torn from one thought to another

Emptiness remains, always.
To experience, never to forget
Burning eternally within
infinite faces lay without name

We each have our moment
within the sour beam of light
and with this absolute clarity
see us more about them than ourselves

Forgive me, oh mistake-less brothers
banish all my foul sins
Keep me from the water
and shower me in flame

For I am a believer
that everything has a consequence
But why are you to decide
who possesses the gleaming innocence

Fear once covered me
and sheltered me like a blanket
How it held me down
but protected me from the colds of the storm

With the two lights of my life
in endless conflict
For guidance, I can't help
but look towards the shadow

Dare I sleep
when I fear to dream
Everything I wanted
slipping away at the seams
Try not to get lost in it
As true as it seems
That face isn't real
even if for you the smile gleams

You may want to run away
and hide there forever
Just give up
and quietly surrender
Fading out
as her beauty begins to render
To sacrifice it all
once again to feel love so tender

Forgive me for remembering
what should not be remembered
Forgive me for questioning
what should not be questioned
Forgive me for apprehending
what should not be apprehended
Forgive me for persisting
what should not be persisted

Forgive me for pretending
what should not be pretended
Forgive me for enjoying
what should not be enjoyed
Forgive me for hurting
what should not be hurt
Forgive me for aiding
what should not be aid

Forgive me for trying
what should not be tried
Forgive me for fighting
what should not be fought
Forgive me for letting go
what should not be let go
Forgive me for thinking
what should not be thought

Forgive me for starting
what should not have started
Forgive me for ending
what should not have ended
Forgive me for breaking
what should not have been broken
Forgive me for forgetting
what should not have been forgotten

The death of friendship
allows negativity to seer
Watch your back naive hypocrite
that closed door is the birthplace of fear

Walking side by side
holding what I thought a mutual respect
I have nothing against you
and you've never given me reason to

You would always give me a bump when I needed you
or kept clear out of my way

Never have I felt to doubt you
or put you in a bad light
While you kept your distance
I was always grateful you kept me in your sight

Hollow but sweet Misfortune
I'm afraid I too have arrived at your boat
And while I walk with his lies
my dear Friendship, slips a knife in Love's throat

Regardless of the season
No matter the reason
I'll always remain by your side

For all time and existance
No matter the distance
Never let your feelings hide


Anything you have to say
I'll always be here
Even if I can't help
I'll always lend an ear

For the friendship we hold
is more than they could ever see
I'll always be here for you
as I know you would be for me

Smiles and rainbows
Within the epicenter of joy
A state of overwhelming happiness
that nothing could possibly destroy

The thought of being with her
Such images could not be dispatched
With her face in mind
that of beauty unmatched

But this warm sensation
now holds a tinge of frost
And for this evening of perfection
soon hope shall be lost

For he approaches
with no fear in mind
Only confidence to be shown
no doubt to be left behind

But as they meet
concern begins to grow
As the happiness that was on his face
on hers does not show

And the love drunk boy
is now painfully sober
In two simple words he is crushed
when hearing "it's over"

unforgiving silence
flesh on vacant sheets

the usual shadow prison
creeps closer
grips tighter
than ever before

relentless
the fingers of uncertainty
restrict thought

this hold it has
won't be leaving
for many moons

as clocks turn
these violent spectres
become increasingly aggressive

until the hollow shell
has become swallowed
by the darkness feared
that under the affectionate guise
was let in

Vicious shades of beauty
painted perfectly upon sheets
Leave eyes immobilized
Glowing radiantly
from head to feet

For they know what they want
their glances gaze true
Eyes glued upon beauty
undeniably
they desire you

For the sight is merely a taste
it is not the end of the amazement, do not fear
To experience all forms of beauty
onward to this maiden
one must be near

As two bodies connect
and a mood shift does start
Lost in the perfection of her eyes
Feeling nothing more
than the beating of a heart

As for her beauty,
mere words cannot describe
And within the epicenter of perfection
and kindness
to one conclusion I have arrive

That you must be an angel
with a body and heart too fine
Dropped from heaven, to this cruel world
I can't question why
but I am more than grateful,
that you are mine

Closing her eyes
all she can feel is pain
Living in a broken life
nothing left to gain
They couldn't possibly understand
they just question if she is sane
All she wants is to be cared for
not money nor fame
The way they treat her
such as an animal untame
For she did not want to be this way
and herself she will blame
For the things they say to her
she will never be the same
Shred is her skin and heart
no longer this world want remain

Hidden beauty
Dressed in shadow
With you
happiness too does weep

Chipped diamond
reflection unseen
lost in the emptiness
of her own doubt

Crying angel
wither no more
cast the tears away
let your true beauty show

Disguised perfection
let that deceptive mirror
lie no more
and let true colors shine


For it isn't when we look
that we find beauty
It is hidden
to be found by others

If i was to retake my actions
am I to expect no reaction?
If I was to live a lie
is to allow my current reality to die
Happiness may not be all of which I relies
but I need the comfort this position provides
I wouldn't want to live in some perfect life
with the ideal 2.5 children and fair wife
I may not like my choices of the past
but I know this hardship won't forever last
The results of our decisions you can see have rosen
not perfect, but it is what I have chosen.

How I love you
But I hate you so much
How I feel when I see your smile
and the look on your face when you blush
makes my my mind go fuzzy
and my blood rapidly rush

I couldn't possibly live without you
Without I'd surely die
But knowing I can no longer be with you
always forces me to cry
Time again and again myself I hurt
but I always seem to try

It feels as if you came from a dream
Body so perfect, face as surreal
But the heart of a devil
Honestly what's the deal?
You act so innocent, flirting away
Why do this, you know my heart you steal

No matter how many times I'm told
I still dish it out on a tray
Watching you trample all over me
knowing how much you me betray
And after all I know so well
I still can't seem to look away

When inspiration dries
and compassion has expired
I am left crying
and bent on my knees
Not for my current misery
but for my realization
And while I may love you
I know it is more than true
That you are beautiful, baby
but you are not the one

How I'm dying to speak to you
but I dare not say a word
My reasons may be a little coward
but I swear beyond it's looks,
it is more complex

Unforgotten
distant memories
And mind-torn scars
Leave me in absolute awe,
devastation and regret

For in my absence
I sense that
we both have grown
grown happier
and further apart

And while I miss you
and would love to hear your voice
I fear to hurt
what you have tried so hard to create
How you tried so hard
to escape how things were with me

And if you have
grown into your own new
happy little world
then who am I
to push inside and damage it
To create doubt
and uncertainty
To show you a ****** love
and half truths

And while it hurts inside
as if a blade is run through my chest
each time I consider picking up the phone
and calling you,
to hear that beautiful voice one more time
But resist I shall,
be strong I will,
for I care too much about you
to dare tear apart your life again
or even let the thought of me scratch it

Please forgive me
but when you call
I shall not answer
when you text
I won't reply
even if you knock at my door
I won't be home
because you are better off without me
and I am better off without you
to leave our perfect dream behind
and begin our own incompletable lives

You say that things will be better now
that we can go back to how things were
Smiling I say nothing
I wish I could believe you

But I know
things will never
be the same

personally I have nothing against him
his reckless ways of going without a care
why she loves him
is something i couldn't possibly comprehend
for I know him not
but he is all i stand against
perfection by his side
but he continues to resent
care not for him
but for her sake I fear.
a girl of such beauty
forever cast in tear

for he doesn't even notice
if he did he just doesn't care
what could she ever do
to recieve this despair

and helplessly here i stand
with motive but no action
i'd love to save the princess
but i am no hero
she wants him
and i am but an observer
treated as if i have no shade
but knowing i would never hurt her
what id do for her to notice me
and no longer hurt further.
for the grip he holds over
seems like her hearts ******

and helplessly here i stand
all i do is pages worden
but as i try to help her
standing in her way i seem a burden

missed calls
texts left on read

why?

how did we get here?

we went from
obnoxious surpluses of excitement
to crushing quantities of hesitation
and restraint

eyes clouded
as check-marks
turn to green
and active status fades out

unable to move
staring motionlessly at
texts, as unwanted as myself
trapped by a prison of thoughts
gazing through tearful vision

You open your mouth
and more inside me dies
Your reasons, your excuses
I'm getting ******* sick of your lies

You tell me how he is like a brother
nothing more than just a friend
While sharing jokes behind my back
but hear nothing I shall pretend

Going out you say,
but wont tell me where
Deep down I know and fear
but buried I will remain in this despair

For I fear to lose you
my feelings have grown to you like rust
But after all the things you do
do you really expect to hold my trust?

To call this a relationship
would be an utter disgrace
How am I supposed to care for you
when you ******* lie to my face?

Here's one for the gamers
dungeon dwellers, competitors and casual players
Whether they're at home or at a friend,
footballers, car racers or dragon slayers

To the world that looks down on us
for those who's hobbies least appeal
Just because they don't understand the reason
or share the passion we feel

Gamers like acheivements
each to their own
Whether its to vanquish the opposition
build, or break their enemies throne

Is that so different
perhaps they spend a lot of time at home
But isn't playing online with their friends
a little better than just sitting alone on ones phone?

The world of gaming has evolved
and adapted so much
It's a common to see a mother aligning fruit
or a child with a flapping duck

And is it such a bad thing
if the players are actually having fun
It may not be making them better
but I can think of many worse things they could have done

They say games encourage violence
but these people are some of the kindest I've ever seen
Theft, ****** and street racing
would it not be better if these things were only done behind a computer screen?

For many, its more than just a game
and can lead to some desperation
But people need to know the limits
and play in moderation

For some
it's to do things they wouldn't normally do or say on a daily basis
A couch potato wanting to explore the world
avoid boredom, keep their mind from stasis

To feel the breeze of a challenge
drive a fast car or
sword-fight,
maybe even do some parkour

Whether they want to skydive
or skate over a hill
To be able to do something dangerous
without having to sign a medical bill

We all have our reasons
some play casually while others play to vent
E-gaming has become so popular
now hosting world tournaments and many gaming event

This is how we are
so please let us be
Our motives are like captured birds
are we are just setting them free

Whether you want to be a princess
or guardian of a banana tree
You can do whatever you want
just follow your dream

People will always be different
this is just another sub-culture; like fans of a band
But we are the gamers
and by this title proudly we stand

Show me those fake smiles
allow me them all consume
Fill me up with your empty happiness
or allow the despair to resume

Staring at the carnage
emotions left to dry
Cavities and loose bearings
lost in the vacancy of the night sky

Lost but never alone
beneath their shadows I hide
In the heaven of happiness
but that love I am denied

Presence as solid as fear
and soul whittled and torn
Scared to even breath
footsteps covered and life forlorn

Sip on his poison
lay your defenses waste
Pour down his toxin
Overwhelmed by the taste

You don't know why you do it
But now you are in his grasp
Foolishly signing the contract
Without seeing what's behind the mask

Young beauty
offers her heart without a clue
Unaware of the devious intentions
His affection always untrue

In the devils den
The clueless girl smiles
Among the scent of others unloved
He another beauty defiles