It's curse in your blood
It's a shake in your step
But I can't stress enough
It's the rush in your head
The rush you leave in my head
Cause I love each flaw
Like the creases in your hands
And the bow in your back.

Yes yes and more yes please
The only answer that should exsist
Not for me
I like no
No is it's own motivation
Movtivation for activation
Earning your way in this tiresome world
I like no.
It doesn't stunt your growth
Indeed the opposite

Give you miles of rope
Hang us from gallows
Flute stuck in our throats


I wonder why you chose to let us
Struggle and choke.

Count back from 10
Calm your mind
Calm your heart
How can I ?
I let you in
I think it's enough to let you see
That I'm hurting
Turning
Burning
Yearning
My words ring so empty to you
So you play with words so beautifully
And sometimes not at all
I'm growing in distance
Your growing so distant
I'm wondering when my head will give up
Holding my heart for you
Consciously I love you
Consciously I'm trying
I know the universe understands
My emptyness
My lonelyness
But do you?

I can see the silhouette of

Your shoulder blade stained against the back of your shirt.

And the way to

Your house is still

Muscle memory even though its been a year.

When I hugged you hello

My body didn’t want to ever let go

And just like old times

Your hairs clung to my clothes from the static between us.

You could be the skin on my bones

But still not be as close as

I want you.

Without conscious thought or deliberation

Our fingers worked their way around each other,

The red string coiling around our wrists and settling in the ridges of our palms.

Except this time, I did not feel the hurt that I used to

When our hands brushed.

This time there was no gnaw because our lips won’t touch.

This time I was happy that

I could love you,

I could love you without hurting myself.

And though i have love for you i can have love again and you can too.

Scatter pieces of me through the universe

its been a year in this golden hearse

No victories just a curse of pain to bleed.

and now your here staining me

youve shown me so much in this year of change

and youll never feel strange to me

your the heaven i thought id never see

and i can understand your lack of belie

There are cityscapes tucked into the crook of your neck

And my lips have been lost for as long as I can remember.

You told me that underneath the steel work

There are catacombs of all the people that have ever tried to love you,

But darling I am not afraid of death.

I heard a story once that the grim reaper

Was just a man who could not die

So to cope,

He shed his skin

And his flesh,

Began taking the souls of everybody else.

I found that I’m the same way;

A man who cannot be loved

So I’ve become toxic in the arms of others.

According to the mathematics

Two negatives together should bring a positive outcome,

But according to science

We can never atomically touch.

According to faith

I am still a believer.

According to my heart

It’s such a shame because

I never wanted to be a traveler