I hunted through the foggy meadows
Weary of all the shadows
Spear held low
Aimed at one figure
I didn't realize my insanity
Creeping up from behind
I hunted my sanity
Yet I became prey to my insanity
Fangs tearing into my throat
Blood spewing from my jugular
I felt no pain
Once the hunter now the prey
Fed on every time I searched for my next meal
I guess it's a famine
My sanity became extinct
Long before it shattered from my parents torment
It was only an illusion
A hallucination to cover up the scars
My body only scarring never amputated
It's a monster I feed
When I become like my egregore
Starved and boney
Hatred and anger became my poison
Finding my sanity could be the cure
No matter how careful I am
I'm still the feast my insanity awaits

I don't need a god
Or any idol before me
I'd rather not kneel and show my weakness
I'd rather weep the tears
Mourn a final time
To show how scared I am
I don't need a cross to hold
I don't need a bottle or blade
I need the silence of a vacant altar
What I need is never what I get
What I want is nothing
But **** it I require a voice to say it'll be ok
For something or somebody
To comfort me in the darkest of days
Even those who love the dark fear it
They know all to well the monsters created
The demons that awaken
It's more than just a nightmare
It's a abyss always drowning its victims
With their own fears
I just pray to my insanity
Maybe my depression
Or perhaps the dark
To allow me one more river of tears
So I can finally swim out of this desert
I've loved and lossed
Lived and learned
Made mistakes invaluable
My proof is the scars
I doubt you'll ever believe the story to
This isn't just an atheists prayer
This is the plea of a monster with no conscious
To finally feel an emotion rather than anger and hate
Depression brings only crimson tears
I just wish somebody can tell me they understand
Yet you'll try and tell me
I should find an anchor in your heavenly father
It's not as easy as saying you believe
I'll never believe in a hypocrite
I'll only believe that one day
My prayer will be answered
With the bringing of boney fingers to my throat
Grains of sands falling
Causing the bells of my demise to toll
Swinging about the sythe to my chest
My prayer is to finally cry
To finally let out all the pain

Mommie
Daddy
I've always wanted to say...
*******!
I've walked these streets
You always kept me shielded from
Never supported what I wanted
I'm not three anymore
How many times do I have to say it
Now I have a new phrase for you
*******!
Your backs are upon me
Thinking I'm the strongest
Just because I'm the biggest
Mom
Dad
Guess what guess what
*******!
The lemons you gave me were rotted
Made the lemonade taste like ****
Couldn't sell it because I'd end up dead
Murdered by the zombie voices eating at my brains
I also would like to say
*******!
Mom
Pops
You just chased out girlfriend #???
*******!
Can't even start making out
Without you busting in and acting like you didn't see this coming
Hey guess what
I've already grown my *****
My ***** dropped
You can go check out the crater they left
So here's a riddle for you
what has 7 letters its a phrase I use quite often
The answer is simple
*******
Mom
Pops
I'm leaving this place
Don't bother coming to my graduation
I don't want you there
You never supported me in school
You just told me what to do
Left me on my own to figure out what the **** to do
Thanks for being an anchor
These currents are really strong
Good thing I'm a good swimmer
Because then I would have let this life **** me
This world will not determine when I die
I will
So *******
*******
*******
I'm tired of hearing you call yourselves parents
You never earned that title
You think having a few kids
Changing diapers and feeding bottle after bottle
Makes you a parent
You're dead wrong
It's the nightmares
You're suppose to help me fight
It's the school bully
You're suppose to help me get rid of
It's the blade across my wrist
You were suppose to notice
Not once did you ever see my pain
You just mocked me when I confided in you that I was scared
You call yourselves parents
Yet all I see are people who fed me nothing but *******
So saying *******
Is my thank you
Without it I wouldn't have learned how to live
How to survive a world
You thought was too wild for me
You only encouraged a monster too wild for this world
******* to the people that have no value to me

Today is my birthday
***** *** real bad
I'm sick
Nobody even noticed
I'm 18 yrs old
Finally made it
Didn't think I would actually
Suprisingly I did
Just have to love my life
Couldn't even express my feelings to the girl I like
Without her pushing me away
But it doesn't matter
I won't be around for much longer
Getting me another job
Moving somewhere quiet
Where only the ocean screams at me

*****
****
*****
*****
Nerd
Punk
******
First words out of your mouth
On the last day of my life
So moments before I pass away
I'll take the time to write them all
On the skin you feared would give you ***
******
Transvestite
Dweeb
*******
Seriously?
You don't remember it
The moments we bumped into each other
In almost every bathroom
Stuffing my face into the fresh ****
You just so happenly dropped
And had all your friends **** on me
As you flushed the toilet over and over again
I'm suprised
You were just joking about it in 5th hour
So allow me to introduce myself again
Hi my name is...
Not going to finish the statement
You usually do with
Queer
***
Short ****
My name has become whatever you decide to call me
And never once do you ever use the same one twice
But today I've kept track
Every name
Every moment in my high school history
Hell even in elementary and middle
You've been there every step of the way
Bullying me even more
Pounding me in the playground
Well I guess I'll show you what you called me
With the bruised body you left me
But I'll finish this off with my actual name *******
My name is Robert Guerrero
I was a poet, the voice to all the people
You thought were your stepping stones to success
Now I'm the corpse you left nameless

With crimson tears in my eyes
I needed you
I wanted those joyful kisses
That always made the day
Worth fighting through
I told you I loved you
I told you I missed you
I told you I was wrong
I swallowed my ego
Through away my pride
Knelt before you
Like the altar of god before
With open arms
Repenting all the sins I did to you
You were my everything
No matter the distance between us
It just made my heart grow stronger
Taking the black hole of nothingness
Turning it into the altar of every mans worship
Wishing their love could be as strong as mine
I told you I would marry you
Give you love happiness and everything
I knew that I would never obtain
Yet again you proved me wrong
You made me the immortal statue
Set in love not stone

Tonight when you feel depressed
Just remember
all it takes is the ****** if a knife
To end it all
Feel the sharp metal
Sink in your skin
Cutting through you life
Feel it slip from your body
All your problems
Going away
All the times your were called
An emo freak, antisocial
Just end it all with that knife
Make it all end
Make it all go away
Never cry again
Never say good bye
Let them know its their fault
Just ****** the blade in your chest
And make it all go away